Should i bother with therapy 42 to 56 years after?

[D.Duck]

I think I'm a bundle of maladaptive ways of coping that could use a bit of unraveling . . . and I agree with you. Thank you, and I normally hate this expression but think it fits, but it is what it is. I was dealt a less than stellar hand, but as you put it, "after therapy.. I know.. I understand....." I think that's worth listening to.

 

[D.Duck]

Short Answer: 1) Treatment 1st began in 1990 (32 yo) for anxiety with a diagnosis of depression about 1994 and BPII in 2000 (42 yo). 2) While being treated year 18 (2018, 60 yo) for BPII, my psychologist of three yrs consulted with both a 2nd psychologist who has more experience with CPTSD and simultaneously my psychiatrist of three years as well. The 2nd psychologist of the three as well my psychiatrist agreed with my regular psychologist. My shrink tells me I'm Counterphobic, a source of some of my trouble.

Looo. . . . . I was 1st diagnosed in 1990 with anxiety and given Ativan. I was diagnosed about 1993 with depression and put on Prozac along with talk therapy accomplishing nothing. I moved in 1996, acquired a new doctor who continued the previous doctor's treatments of Ativan and Prozac until his license was suspended about 2000 for an inappropriate sexual relationship with a female patient. It was then my now ex and I went to marriage counseling and the counselor, using a PC screening program flagged me as potentially BP. She referred me to a psychiatrist who confirmed BPII. I, being the trusting soul I'm really not, insisted on a diagnosis from a local University Medical teaching Hospital. They weren't happy when I wouldn't tell them what I'd been diagnosed with (I didn't want to prime them) and they came back with BPII as well. My parents were visiting as well and were interviewed by both sets of doctors and everyone agreed BP likely started for me around 14 or 15. So I went undiagnosed and untreated if you believe the doctors, from 15 to 42 for BP and 4 yo to 60 for CPTSD with "final trauma" in 1976 or 18 yo. My shrink tells me I'm Counterphobic, a source of some of my trouble.

*I think the CPTSD would be better started about 8 yo. with 4 yo the beginning of the trauma but w/o the disorder.

I'm sorry, I placed my answer in the wrong location, after the next question or comment but definitely page I think. I'm new. I beg forgiveness.

 

[D.Duck]

I know this is completely out of order, and I have to get to bed, too, but I was wondering if the information I provided helped make sense of what I'd posted before.

 

[ms spock]

Is the BP Bipolar or Borderline Personality or something else?

I don't know if it is still a rule on the forum, but it used to be that abbreviations were discouraged because members come from all over the world, and what is a common sense abbreviation in your part of the world, is just confusing in another part of the world. I often won't respond to a thread if someone is using abbreviations. I just don't have the time to work them out.

What is GSD?

Also abbreviations weren't used as English is not everyone's first language. I would suggest, if you want more responses, maybe cut out the abbreviations? I know I forget and use them sometimes as well.

Yes, yes, yes yes! It is worth it!

I have 30/40/45/48 years since my traumas. Doing the trauma therapy is changing my life in ways I didn't know that were possible. Even my experience of my actual physical pain has changed. It is not easy. It won't be easy at all. Is it worth the pain, time and effort. Absolutely!

My question, finally, is whether there is any point in therapy when the trauma is so far removed from today? Reviewing the symptoms is uncanny in how close they fit and how well they explain problems in both employment and personal relationships. I'd like to pursue it, but there's the 50-year gap. Suggestions appreciated. Oh, the traumatization. Beatings, beatdowns with weaponry, etc. She says I'm counterphobic which helps explain why I kept going back for more.

It is absolutely worth it, despite there being a 50 year gap! Absolutely it is worth it! It won't feel like it for periods of time, but that is part of the process. Grab the therapy with both hands and embrace it! It will give you connections and options that you aren't even aware of, and it will assist you in social connectedness and relationships in ways you aren't even aware of as being possible.

I am also counterphobic.

It means you won't pass as much stuff down to the next generation as well.

 

[Sweetleaf]

You have suffered for long enough without having therapy for it, it's time you end that. It makes me hurt when I see that people have gone without treatment for their PTSD or CPTSD for any amount of time.

I don't know how I would handle this stuff without therapy and all the other support I'm getting. You may have gone a long time without, but it's never too late to reach out for help and get therapy for your trauma.

 

[D.Duck]

I know this is completely out of order, and I have to get to bed, too, but I was wondering if the inform...

Is the BP Bipolar or Borderline Personality or something else?

I don't know if it is still...

I'm sorry. BP stands for Bipolar Disorder in the States. BP is usually either BP I or BP II. BP alone is simply generic Bipolar. GSD = German Shepherd Dog distinguishing it from a human German Shepherd as a German friend has repeatedly pointed out to me. I'll make certain I don't use abbreviations going forward. I hope this isn't more confusing.

 

[void]

So, 1st of all, @D.Duck...........a warm welcome!

So I went undiagnosed and untreated if you believe the doctors, from 15 to 42 for BP and 4 yo to 60 for CPTSD with "final trauma" in 1976 or 18 yo

2nd...it sickens me to the core that you were failed by Society and these professions to this degree. Sadly, I can relate, but this is not about me.

There IS still time and you ARE WORTH getting competent professional help.

A skilled T. would recognize BP II in only a few sessions, same goes for the trauma aspect. You were let down horribly. You have the right to feel anger, sadness etc... about that fact.

Do you have confidence in your current T or T's, that they REALLY get you??

 

[recoveringfromptsd]

My trauma began 55 years ago, and the worse (severe) 40 years ago, I have been in psych care since I was 14. First Hospitalization at 17. I am still in care. I kind of see it as maintenance of my miserable existence. C-PTSD together with BP is hard to diagnose, it took over 40 years to get my C-PTSD diagnosis and BP 1 diagnosis. Every DX under the sun until then.

I believe there is good purpose in getting treatment even after so many years, for some of us its what keeps us alive or out of trouble.

 

[ms spock]

I'll make certain I don't use abbreviations going forward. I hope this isn't more confusing.

That is just great. Very clear to me, and not confusing at all.

 

[D.Duck]

So, 1st of all, @D.Duck...........a warm welcome!


2nd...it sickens me to the core that...

Thank you for your words of concern. I do have confidence in my current psychologist and psychiatrist but with Bipolar, not CPTSD. I've seen them three plus years now and would have said goodbye some time ago otherwise. My only problem is that I can't see them while traveling. Skype might help if they're amenable and insurance is too. My "T's" get me alright, including the contained explosive anger and occupation with revenge, though that's never going anywhere. I like them. We get along well enough that I feel comfortable and start "playing" during sessions (it's not really, everything is a chance to test and learn). The Jury's out with CPTSD.

As far as going so long w/o a diagnosis I can't say. It might be from the defenses I've built up over the years may be made worse by the work I chose. Seeing felons as often as I do - even once is too much let alone roughly four times/year is stressful and might make me hunker down more - could add layers of protection to cut through even if I am counterphobic as I was told.

OTOH, I could be making excuses for people I really don't know anything about. At this point, I'm more confused than anything. Maybe once I get my bearings I can level some specific criticism but till then keep my powder dry. I really appreciate your worry and input.

 

[EveHarrington]

If your treatment team couldn’t spot cptsd in you, they aren’t equipped to treat you.

I’d try to find a trauma specialist.

 

[D.Duck]

I understand what you're saying. The one shrink in the practice with experience noticed it from my regular psych's notes. Maybe I should switch to her. My insurance, such as it is is limiting though worth a look given your comment. I think my regular Psychologist can't wait to get started tomorrow so I'll hear her out.

Out of curiosity, and because this is new for me, what do you think they should have noticed? I know you're not a professional, but is there anything in particular I can use tomorrow, like how could you have missed this or that for three years? Thanks for your help.