Dom Violence Powerful hashtag

[dulcia]

I just ran across tweets with the #MaybeHeDoesntHitYou hashtag and it is so validating.

 

[somerandomguy]

Someday, somewhere, somehow there will be a gender neutral hashtag. This one kind of sucks since studies appear to show that women emotionally abuse men more often than the opposite. (Men physically abuse women far more, of course.)

I apologize for being petty about this. I understand why it exists and I'm glad it does. But if I tried to start the same hashtag with the other pronoun, I suspect it would not go well.

 

[dulcia]

Valid point, in regards to gender neutral and non-hetero relationships. Although there are some #MaybeSheDoesntHitYou posts in the thread too, for what it's worth..

 

[somerandomguy]

Well I held my breath and googled it. Looks like it's a really old hashtag, dating to 2016 or so. It seems to be coming around again.

It looks like it is a rare case where there was very little pushback against men using the same (though gender-swapped) tag.
The Importance Of #MaybeSheDoesntHitYou
25+ Men Reveal How Women Abuse Them, And You Might Be Doing It Too
Link Removed

I apologize for my kneejerk reaction. I'm very happy to be wrong!

 

[EveHarrington]

Not to be an ass, but with no less than 2,485 ways to describe someone’s sexuality/gender these days, it really should use “they”.

 

[somerandomguy]

#MaybeTheyDon'tHitYou has the advantage of being able to be used by anyone.

No hits on Google for that one, unfortunately.

 

[hithere]

Someday, somewhere, somehow there will be a gender neutral hashtag. This one kind of sucks since s...

THANK YOU SO MUCH @somerandomguy These hashtags upset me-- women murder their partners every f*cking month and no one f*cking cares

 

[dulcia]

This felt too personal for me to share on social media, but, as I said, I felt validated reading so many experiences that mirrored mine. These comments now, though, are having the exact opposite effect so I guess I'm out :tup:

 

[hithere]

This felt too personal for me to share on social media, but, as I said, I felt validated reading so many...

I'm truly sorry if I hurt you. The hashtag really triggered me, and I just came from a horrible therapy session that left me triggered and one of my main traumas--and of course I knew no one would believe me, that there is no way for a woman to abuse a man. So I truly want you to feel validated. but for those of us who have been told that a woman cannot be violent and cruel--or else the man did something so bad to make her behave that way--well I'm just in a really, really bad place right now. So again. I do truly apologize if I have hurt you with my comments. just right now I'm in a really highly triggered state. Violence against a partner is horrible. I truly am sorry for your situation.

 

[somerandomguy]

Yeah, I just kind of took over this thread. Sorry about that. :(

 

[Suzetig]

These hashtags upset me-- women murder their partners every f*cking month and no one f*cking cares

Do you have evidence for this? In England and Wales two women every week are murdered by their male partner/ex partner, add in Scotland and Northern Ireland and the figures increase. Those stats literally haven’t changes in the time I’ve been working in this field, so approximately 20 years. There are no comparable stats for men killed by female partners/ex partner or in same sex relationships. I’m not saying for a second that abuse doesn’t happen in those relationships, merely that research shows it’s much much less likely to end in the death of a partner.

There’s a standardised tool now available for assessing the risk of death to a woman at the hands of her male partner, this is possible because of the wealth of data availabile because so many women die under these circumstances. There simply isn’t the same evidence base for men being killed by female partners so if you have figures that challenge this, I’d love to see them.

 

[hithere]

yes but too f*cked up today to deal with this