What common aftermath do you experience?

[HëllaBubz]

I have this thing. Mostly it gets set off, but on occasion it doesn't get set off.

It usually happens when I'm enjoying life being normal and then all of a sudden something doesn't feel right, I ask for it to stop and then after a moment's worried silence, I break into tears, keening quietly and curl up in a little ball.

I'm talking about being tickled, or horsing around on the bed.

You know when you're enjoying a hug, or a cuddle, and you poke an eye, wet willy and ear, pull a hair and the faux annoyance on their face has you laughing so hard they mock retaliate?

Some people when annoyed are *so* much fun to annoy that you just get a fit of the giggles and you just can't stop!

But the aftermath......Christ.....the aftermath.

When I've finished sobbing while my supporter wraps his arms around me and pats my back, I get gently shoved to the shower because he knows I need some stimulation to pull myself out of it.

If it's too hot, I feel like I'm suffocating.
Then the crushing migraine comes which won't leave until I take codeine which dulls it slightly.
Then I spend the day drained.
Temperature sensitive.
Dropped core temperature sensation.
Exhausted like I've run a damn marathon and can't keep awake.
Body starts aching like I've got the flu.
Muscles go like rocks around my neck and shoulders.
EDIT: I forgot all things gastrointestinal - man oh man does that go to hell! Random stomach pains, bloating, upset digestion!
I don't know if this could be called a trigger as such, but it sure as f*ck is a nice way to remember that I can't have fun like normal people do......just on case I get too cocky and start actually being fully functioning or something...

 

[shimmerz]

I have heard by a good many healers along the way that the nervous system doesn`t know the difference between having fun and being freaked out. It just gets activated because it is overwhelmed in that moment.

Wondering if the fun could be a trip through some sort of slowed down exposure so the body knows that all is well?

 

[blackemerald1]

I have this thing. Mostly it gets set off, but on occasion it doesn't get set off.

You pretty much nailed my aftermath experiences with your description ^^^ @TheBubzilla - so at least know you are 'not alone'. Not exactly the same but too close for comfort in many ways. and I don't have the kindness of a partner to help me but hey shit happens eh? I will likely get nasty horrible skin conditions that take weeks to resolve. (But probably bc I am so dam old now idk). I know it is auto immune stuff that gets a walk up start after this... fun filled moment. :banghead:

 

[EveHarrington]

I have similar triggers.

They then look at me like “omg what did I do?!?”

 

[HëllaBubz]

Wondering if the fun could be a trip through some sort of slowed down exposure so the body knows that all is well?

I'm sure it could but the problem is that sometimes I forget about the ptsd - I've accepted I have it but I refuse to be held hostage. And so I'll go along enjoying life and then get a fun reminder like this.....

I know it is auto immune stuff that gets a walk up start after this... fun filled moment. :banghead:

Ptsd and autoimmune really go hand in hand don't they!

You pretty much nailed my aftermath experiences with your description ^^^ @TheBubzilla - so at least know you are 'not alone'.

Thank you. It's been a while since I'd been on here and sometimes I struggle to understand if things are PTSD normal or not.....yes, yes, I know there's a broad scope of that too haha

 

[shimmerz]

but the problem is that sometimes I forget about the ptsd

I have a lot of problems, but I gotta tell you I would jump off the Eiffel Tower for this one. Just poking fun, but man oh man, I don't think I have ever forgotten about my PTSD long enough to have fun. Gives me hope that one day..... :confused:

 

[HëllaBubz]

the nervous system doesn`t know the difference between having fun and being freaked out

This would be me on swings at parks.

But here's the interesting thing, I got sent on an adrenaline Tiger Moth aerobatics flight last year - I was really comcerned it would set me off but it didn't and I was begging for more!

Stupid ptsd, make up your mind!

 

[HëllaBubz]

Gives me hope that one day.....

I cracked the shits and decided I was too lazy too ptsd. Brain doing hypervigilance aka scary people all around? Piss off, I can't be assed today. Its not going to happen so stop thinking the worst!
I will work all day, love my job and wontw think about it once.
I'll go horse riding and its just me and the horse.
Play with my daughter - just me and her.
Hell, I was out at a networking for artists function on Friday night, heaps of strangers to socialise with, plus had a guy cracking onto to me heavily with my back pushed up against a bar and I smack him down with a smooth one liner that had him roaring with laughter and he bought me another drink, we parted amicably.

Such a long way for someone who has had her drink spiked, been raped, gang raped, assaulted and couldn't socialise!

I guess I just got resentful of it taking over everything because I had better things to do.
But let me tell you, it took close to 10 years to get to that stage!

 

[shimmerz]

But let me tell you, it took close to 10 years to get to that stage!

That's horrible but that makes the selfish side of me feel better. It has been just over 10 years for me when PTSD hit me like a German air train! Yikes. Thanks @TheBubzilla

 

[HëllaBubz]

makes the selfish side of me feel better

No, it just lets you know that I'm normal too, it does get better and that wonder insta-miracles don't exist so there's nothing wrong with you taking the time you need.

 

[EmmaOwl]

the nervous system doesn`t know the difference between having fun and being freaked out. It just gets activated because it is overwhelmed in that moment.

My therapist is on that note all the time. Fight or flight, even if it is something good gets my heart racing, and I don't know what else to do but be scared. Like I have no choice - if I go out, I'm terrified, if I stay home, I'm terrified... and that's just the problem in its simplest form!

 

[HëllaBubz]

even if it is something good gets my heart racing

This was me yesterday, I usually go for a 2 hour ride and my horse decided that rather than the usual leisurely gallop, we were going to RACE the other horse over really rocky ground.......definitely had my heart in my throat! The other rider looked at me when we pulled our horses up and his face matched mine haha.

Mind you, horses are the LOVE of my life, second only to my child, best friend and dog - but he definitely gave me a few moments worry!