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Responses To Your Therapist That You Will Probably Never Say

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Your deadlines and my life do not dance together.

And not only it ain’t ballet, it f*cks with my jungle tango, too.
By which time I duck. And holler for air support. And take things in minutes and square breathing and phew, everything is fine, that enough.

The only plus side of it is I look presentable for the environs. Because so acutely aware of everyone’s perception and movement I want to throw up at the breeze of a wind. And the lack of fireworks is confusing and more nauseating, not less.
 
Though I appreciate that you consider my self care above that of my dog... when I tell you that I have a new fear/avoidance of walking her due to the rolling flashbacks/panic attack I had last time, my concern is not about how to keep moving, it is about me wanting my dog to be able enjoy the scents and nature of our trails. So quite honestly... your solutions suck.
 
Look, the time I end up feeling I need to apologize for things like being sick, because oh, it does not meet your schedules, something is wrong.

So also trying to remember the other half of Reasonable shit my brain can come up with, being I am supposed to severe or terminate the relatioship, instead of try be using harder and more smashing self injury I been turning to lately.

Tbqh being homeless IS bloody preferable to dealing with all of this stress for nothing. So stop with your catastrophizing scenarios, for they are not mine.
 
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