Only took 50 years to deal with my abuse.

[somerandomguy]

...

 

[somerandomguy]

Hit "edit" on the post with the thing you want to delete.

 

[PTSDGuy]

Hit "edit" on the post with the thing you want to delete.

I graduated University and everything! I can do that editing stuff! (I'm definitely done with the flashback.... )

Thanks.... I guess I'll stick around... There's some really amazing people here.... I'll have to find a new dog pic I guess . ?

 

[Sideways]

I hope it’s ok for me to write here briefly, because the last thing I want to do is upset you. I don’t think you’re a bigot. To the contrary, I think your last post in particular was incredibly brave, and for me personally? It was really powerful.

I happen to be Bi, but I don’t tend to include that in LGBTI debates because I know that I haven’t experienced anything like the type of discrimination and oppression that so many of the community has. I have no idea about just how devastating your experiences have been on your life: not just as a child, but throughout your life. I would never pretend to know what that’s like. And it doesn’t amount to much? But I’m sorry. You should never have gone through that.

All that said, I’m an eternal optimist I think. Here in Australia, we recently voted for (and won) marriage equality. Long overdue, but it was a landslide vote in favour of equality. And that meant that a shiteload of straight people voted for equality. I’m proud of the straight people who voted against discrimination even though they have no first hand experience of homophobia. They aren’t all bad.

Putting our story and our pain out there like you did today is really tough, so I hope you’re being gentle on yourself now. You were heard. Even if the way you said it didn’t fit with the rules of the forum? You were heard. And I hope you’re ok and that you stick around.

 

[Deleted member 47099]

I just wanted to say that I hardly ever post outside of the "diaries" section.

The general threads here are so full of triggered/ triggering/ dysregulated comments - it's incredible.

I'm trying to view it as "people on a PTSD forum are gonna be triggered and dysregulated a lot of the time" and just completely ignore it and blank it out.

I just refuse to/ can't engage with it.

Somehow being dysregulated brings out the WORST in people.

I've got about 35 people and threads on "ignore" right now :facepalm:

Dysregulated peeps are the worst :p

Hope you stick around and make copious use of your "ignore" button and just throw everything on a big pile of "incredibly crap stuff people say when dysregulated".

Even people who are pretty nice/ sensitive/ thoughtful/ respectful when regulated can be plain AWFUL when dysregulated.

:hug: if you accept

Edit to add: I'm not making specific comments about the particular thread - I haven't gone to look at it again, after it was initially posted. I'm just referring to the kind of stuff that gets said around here a lot.

 

[PTSDGuy]

:hug: if you accept

Thank you. I really appreciate the reply. I'm just having a hard time right now with everything in life... My husband told me yesterday that he doesn't think there's room in the relationship for my PTSD. Then I got banned from the thread...

I was hoping I'd feel better after a night of sleep, but I'm still feeling like I just want to escape everything.

I think I had an hour or two after EMDR this week that I thought things were improving. Nope. Same hell, different day.

 

[Deleted member 47099]

he doesn't think there's room in the relationship for my PTSD

Crikey.


:hug:

 

[PTSDGuy]

Crikey.


:hug:

I'm sorry, I shouldn't be dumping my stuff on people...

 

[Deleted member 47099]

I'm sorry, I shouldn't be dumping my stuff on people...

Eh..! That's negative old PTSD thoughts from childhood :P

This is your trauma diary, OF COURSE you're meant to dump stuff here!! :)

I hope your husband's just overwhelmed right now, and struggling to catch up.

Us starting our PTSD journey can be reeeeally overwhelming for those around us too.

Some people truly cannot cope with it tho. That's very difficult to accept.

I hope he catches up! :)

:hug:

 

[PTSDGuy]

I'm sure me suddenly expecting him to pay attention to my stuff isn't easy. My T tells me that I basically traded a narcissistic pedophile abuser for a narcissistic husband... Which I'm realizing is probably true, unfortunately.

 

[Deleted member 47099]

Sometimes we make those kind of relationship choices, yes.

I guess time will tell?

Have you asked him to come to a therapy session with you?

Maybe it could be good to just have a general conversation with you, him and your T about how it's difficult for partners to deal with PTSD and what might be helpful, what he find difficult, etc... ?

Maybe best to ask/ suggest this once he's calmed down tho and isn't feeling negative about/ overwhelmed by your PTSD stuff?

 

[PTSDGuy]

I hope it’s ok for me to write here briefly, because the last thing I want to do is upset you. I don’t think you’re a bigot. To the contrary, I think your last post in particular was incredibly brave, and for me personally? It was really powerful.

I happen to be Bi, but I don’t tend to include that in LGBTI debates because I know that I haven’t experienced anything like the type of discrimination and oppression that so many of the community has. I have no idea about just how devastating your experiences have been on your life: not just as a child, but throughout your life. I would never pretend to know what that’s like. And it doesn’t amount to much? But I’m sorry. You should never have gone through that.

All that said, I’m an eternal optimist I think. Here in Australia, we recently voted for (and won) marriage equality. Long overdue, but it was a landslide vote in favour of equality. And that meant that a shiteload of straight people voted for equality. I’m proud of the straight people who voted against discrimination even though they have no first hand experience of homophobia. They aren’t all bad.

Putting our story and our pain out there like you did today is really tough, so I hope you’re being gentle on yourself now. You were heard. Even if the way you said it didn’t fit with the rules of the forum? You were heard. And I hope you’re ok and that you stick around.

I'm sorry I didn't respond til now... @Sideways, your message means a lot to me right now... I didn't respond, but it really touched me... I've spent all night beating myself up for posting it... I put really personal stuff out there, and got told I'm a bigot... It shouldn't bother me, but it does...

My point wasn't really saying straight people shouldn't have a say in LGBT rights... I was just trying to explain stuff so they'd get how personal the discussion was for me.... But it doesn't matter...

Thank your for the message. :hug: