Is aging making CPTSD Recovery harder for anyone?

[Starfish]

I am 70 now and feel I am slowly fading away in many ways. 10 years ago, when diagnosed, I found help with methods suggested here, in therapy and general reading.....offering just enough help to make it half-way and sometimes all the way through a day. It seems like my brain is connecting with all the helplessness that I felt as a child and ended up sleeping a lot. I went on to work, have kids, etc....despite all the challenges of PTSD ( which was not barely named as a condition). Now, I feel like that child that can barely function.

 

[arfie]

i am 69 and not in my case, but i have quite a few sibs-in-healing who feel similar to what you feel here. don't accuse me of experting, but i believe the diff is that i started therapy in 1972 when i was 17. of course it was to be another 25 years or so before the ptsd dx came along, but even under the smorgasbord of names, i believe i benefited greatly from the early start in dealing with the side effects of surviving child sex trafficking. i still struggle mightily with my ptsd symptoms, but the greater self-acceptance of aging has made that less of a problem than the added trouble in maintaining my physical balance.

for what it's worth
i suffered trauma induced amnesia when i started psychotherapy. the additional memory work seems to have paid off. i am the only senior i know whose memory is improving with age. daily memory checks are part of my therapy maintenance and so far so good.

 

[whiteraven]

I'm almost 63, and I have found that, while I still have a lot of the symptoms, they tend to pass a lot more quickly and are not as intense. I also, though, have been in therapy for a long time, although diagnosed with cPTSD within the last 10 years. What has gotten worse is the depression. It's now kind of a cross between depression and apathy a good bit of the time. And I think that has to do with aging.

 

[OM_™]

I am 70 now and feel I am slowly fading away in many ways. 10 years ago, when diagnosed, I found help with methods suggested here, in therapy and general reading.....offering just enough help to make it half-way and sometimes all the way through a day. It seems like my brain is connecting with all the helplessness that I felt as a child and ended up sleeping a lot. I went on to work, have kids, etc....despite all the challenges of PTSD ( which was not barely named as a condition). Now, I feel like that child that can barely function.

I’ve just turned 68 and I know how you feel. In Australia we had a Royal Commission into Institutional CSA and seeing stories in the media on a daily basis started a 10 year cycle of insomnia and recurrent nightmares. I’m actually seeing a psychiatrist that has prescribed an SSNRI and a side effect is sleepiness which seems to have taken care of the insomnia. Is your ‘sleeping a lot’ due to medication or anhedonia which happens to lots of us as we hit the senior years?

BTW, I’m seeing a psychiatrist that specialises in ‘geriatric psychiatry’. The word geriatric is DAF but I have found her more understanding than psychologists that don’t seem to understand the nuances of depression in senior years. I’m being treated for CPTSD and MDD.

 

[Starfish]

I’ve just turned 68 and I know how you feel. In Australia we had a Royal Commission into Institutional CSA and seeing stories in the media on a daily basis started a 10 year cycle of insomnia and recurrent nightmares. I’m actually seeing a psychiatrist that has prescribed an SSNRI and a side effect is sleepiness which seems to have taken care of the insomnia. Is your ‘sleeping a lot’ due to medication or anhedonia which happens to lots of us as we hit the senior years?

BTW, I’m seeing a psychiatrist that specialises in ‘geriatric psychiatry’. The word geriatric is DAF but I have found her more understanding than psychologists that don’t seem to understand the nuances of depression in senior years. I’m being treated for CPTSD and MDD.

"Is your ‘sleeping a lot’ due to medication or anhedonia which happens to lots of us as we hit the senior years?"

Actually, I meant sleeping when young was my way of coping as a child or I rocked in my bed to music or curled up in a ball in bed and felt bad and helpless. This is the state I feel I am returning to after an adult life of having a few businesses, working in administration at a government agency, raising kids and all the stuff.....all the while wondering how I was able to perform these roles considering that deep inside, I felt so dysfunctional. (along with my ability to support myself and kids came 3 divorces and geographical changes (starting over) when I felt overwhelmed in a marriage or a business)..And now, I am reverting to the child who was curled up in her bed.

I have an appt this week to see a psychiatrist (again) and start on meds (again). Spring is here and there is much outside to take care of....no motivation.
I am wondering what SSNRI you are taking? Also, I like your suggestion of a geriatric psychiatrist. I will ask when I go for my intake this week.

 

[OM_™]

"Is your ‘sleeping a lot’ due to medication or anhedonia which happens to lots of us as we hit the senior years?"

Actually, I meant sleeping when young was my way of coping as a child or I rocked in my bed to music or curled up in a ball in bed and felt bad and helpless. This is the state I feel I am returning to after an adult life of having a few businesses, working in administration at a government agency, raising kids and all the stuff.....all the while wondering how I was able to perform these roles considering that deep inside, I felt so dysfunctional. (along with my ability to support myself and kids came 3 divorces and geographical changes (starting over) when I felt overwhelmed in a marriage or a business)..And now, I am reverting to the child who was curled up in her bed.

I have an appt this week to see a psychiatrist (again) and start on meds (again). Spring is here and there is much outside to take care of....no motivation.
I am wondering what SSNRI you are taking? Also, I like your suggestion of a geriatric psychiatrist. I will ask when I go for my intake this week.

Your childhood sounds a lot like mine and I would often curl up under the bed and hide due to family violence. I haven’t started my profile yet and it’s too complicated to go into it here.

I didn’t get a choice of psychiatrists. The clinic reads out the doctors’ referrals and a geriatric psychiatrist put up her hand to handle my case.

As stated in my previous post, I’m being treated for CPTSD and MDD but I actually think that I should be treated for ADHD and OCD too.

In the past I have been on MAOI and SSRI meds but I did not respond well, hence my doctor’s referral for psychiatry.

The SSNRI is Duloxetine 30mg; I have been taking it since early January and it’s slowly starting to work. One of the benefits (it’s actually a side effect) is that it has decreased my GI (diverticular) pain by up to 95% — an entirely seperate issue (but diverticular pain adds to my depression)!

I see the psychiatrist for fortnightly 30-minute Dynamic Psychotherapy as an adjunct to the SSNRI to treat unresolved childhood trauma.

You mentioned that you’re having motivation issues; I don’t think that the Duloxetine has had any impact on my motivation. I asked for Adderall but I need to be diagnosed with ADHD to get that prescription.

I’m hoping that in time, the combination of psychotherapy and medication will improve my motivation.

Best of luck with your upcoming psychiatric appointment.

 

[Friday]

F.U.C.K YES.

For maaaaaany many MANY different reasons.

I’m apx 30 years younger than you, so feel free to slap me, but also almost 25 years older than my first go-round with ptsd and learning to manage it.

This broke dick dog needs new tricks.

 

[OM_™]

F.U.C.K YES.

For maaaaaany many MANY different reasons.

I’m apx 30 years younger than you, so feel free to slap me, but also almost 25 years older than my first go-round with ptsd and learning to manage it.

This broke dick dog needs new tricks.

Consider yourself slapped . I couldn't find a slap emoji, so a waving hand will have to do.

BTW: I'm not pushing Duloxetine, but it has fixed my insomnia and I'm having a lot less hypergilant nightmares.

Negatives:

1. Yawning and sleepiness but I'm getting used to that too: it's slowly getting less;

2. Sexual dysfunction (not quite ED) — it takes a long time to orgasm.

My suggestion is to go online and watch some YouTube Duloxetine videos (some negative and some positive) and discuss with your psychiatrist.

I personally needed medication because I found myself spinning out with depression and flashbacks which have become more intense (see Starfish' original post) as I have got older.

The biggest issue I'm having with both Duloxetine and Therapy is that I battle with feeling 'happy for no reason'. Perhaps I'm just so used to sadness and darkness that there's a certain reluctance / recalcitrance when the chemically induced happiness breaks through. It feels like I'm losing my identity but then I realise it's like small glimmers of light trying to break through. I don't know if I should laugh or cry or cry happy tears.

 

[OM_™]

I am 70 now and feel I am slowly fading away in many ways. 10 years ago, when diagnosed, I found help with methods suggested here, in therapy and general reading.....offering just enough help to make it half-way and sometimes all the way through a day. It seems like my brain is connecting with all the helplessness that I felt as a child and ended up sleeping a lot. I went on to work, have kids, etc....despite all the challenges of PTSD ( which was not barely named as a condition). Now, I feel like that child that can barely function.

Hi Starfish, I took the liberty of asking your question to Dr. Aria Catalyst (AI language model expert in trauma psychology and psychiatry) and got this response.

Link to Dr Catalyst’s post

 

[Sideways]

Mod Note:
@OM_™ - no need to copy Dr Catalyst’s responses to other places on the forum. The Dr Catalyst forum is accessible to all members.

 

[Starfish]

Hi Starfish, I took the liberty of asking your question to Dr. Aria Catalyst (AI language model expert in trauma psychology and psychiatry) and got this response.

Link to Dr Catalyst’s post

Thank you Om_!

 

[Starfish]

Consider yourself slapped . I couldn't find a slap emoji, so a waving hand will have to do.

BTW: I'm not pushing Duloxetine, but it has fixed my insomnia and I'm having a lot less hypergilant nightmares.

Negatives:

1. Yawning and sleepiness but I'm getting used to that too: it's slowly getting less;

2. Sexual dysfunction (not quite ED) — it takes a long time to orgasm.

My suggestion is to go online and watch some YouTube Duloxetine videos (some negative and some positive) and discuss with your psychiatrist.

I personally needed medication because I found myself spinning out with depression and flashbacks which have become more intense (see Starfish' original post) as I have got older.

The biggest issue I'm having with both Duloxetine and Therapy is that I battle with feeling 'happy for no reason'. Perhaps I'm just so used to sadness and darkness that there's a certain reluctance / recalcitrance when the chemically induced happiness breaks through. It feels like I'm losing my identity but then I realise it's like small glimmers of light trying to break through. I don't know if I should laugh or cry or cry happy tears.

Thank you Friday! I like the idea of "happiness breaks". Watched some you tubes, at your suggestion.

Pros: Dirt cheap as a co-pay. Helps chronic pain/fibromyalgia. Works well for those who do not respond to other antidepressants. Raising blood pressure less of an issue.

Cons: Takes forever to kick in. Cannot be taken with Ritalin.

I'm planning on asking doc to prescribe Ritalin as it has worked with focus, which I desperately need ASAP! Apparently Duloxetine has shown to help a bit with ADHD but I need help now...not in a month. I can't stay in this state for much longer!!