Any experience with a malignant narcissist?

[Rose White]

I still don’t know how to tell if someone is NPD let alone malignant since most narcissists avoid diagnosis or manipulate T’s until they are referred out. The term has been used so much that I struggle to find it useful. Also, it gives an out for abuse—as in, they have a condition (but they’ve never been diagnosed.). It’s easier to say “my dad was a narcissist” than “my dad always calmed down after hurting or humiliating me—he’s a shitty asshole.”

Conflating narcissism with sadistic behavior isn’t accurate or helpful to me currently.

 

[Elle Garnett]

There doesn't seem to be a ton of information about malignant narcissism out there. It's a type of narcissism that includes all the traits you'd expect from standard narcissism (profound insecurity, excessive need to admiration, etc.). In addition, malignant narcissists are said to have symptoms of sadism and paranoia as well. Not sadism as in being a jerk and getting off on it. Sadism as in they involuntarily experience legit pleasure, a drug-like high, from being around suffering, whether they directly caused it or not.

I know there is lots of vague, watery information and opinions out there about narcissists, much of it from people who aren't mental health experts. I'm interested in hopefully finding more legitimate info about this particular type of narcissist, or hearing from people who sincerely believe they've dealt with one.

Prof. Sam Vaknin is expert on this topic he has decades experience - look him up

 

[GammaRay]

Prof. Sam Vaknin is expert on this topic he has decades experience - look him up

I saw a television special with him once. He focuses on NPD - and actually claims to be a narcissist himself I believe. I don't know if he has written about the malignant narcissist subtype, with sadism and paranoia being additional distinct features.

 

[Friday]

I saw a television special with him once. He focuses on NPD - and actually claims to be a narcissist himself I believe. I don't know if he has written about the malignant narcissist subtype, with sadism and paranoia being additional distinct features.

Sadists, NPD people, & Paranoids? Can ALL be reeeeeally good people. Or shit people. And everything in between. The disorders, in and of themselves, do not predict ethos/ethics/morality of the individual. Even if it often predicts personality.

Putting all 3 together? Creates a very specific cocktail, that truly does indicate malignancy.

In a way that any 2 together, or 1 alone, does not.

It’s very common for narcissists, but NOT people with narcissistic tendencies (which tend to be “worse” odd,y enough), to specialize in studying narcissism.

 

[GammaRay]

It’s very common for narcissists, but NOT people with narcissistic tendencies (which tend to be “worse” odd,y enough), to specialize in studying narcissism.

This seems strange since, from what I've read, self awareness is a huge weakness in narcissists. In other words, narcissists aren't self aware enough to know that they're narcissists, let alone make a study of their disorder. That is one thing that struck me as perhaps suspicious, if not hackish, about Vaknin. But TBH, I haven't read his book or looked into his work enough to discount him.

 

[Friday]

This seems strange since, from what I've read, self awareness is a huge weakness in narcissists. In other words, narcissists aren't self aware enough to know that they're narcissists, let alone make a study of their disorder. That is one thing that struck me as perhaps suspicious, if not hackish, about Vaknin. But TBH, I haven't read his book or looked into his work enough to discount him.

It’s actually the single best test FOR NPD; ask the person if they’re a narcissist. Most, to nearly all, say? Yes. Absolutely. Of course. Because not being so? Seems insane. To narcissists.

Receiving THERAPY for narcissists… is rare. It’s like receiving therapy for being sane, to become insane, for other people. All, let’s go get electric shock treatments to gibber & drool! Um. No. That’s nuts.

But “rare” statistically speaking? Is still 10-25%.

Even the remaining 75%? Are not all, or even mostly, completely self-unaware & uninterested. To the contrary, most narcissists are extremely aware & interested in their own lives.

 

[texasbuckeye]

There doesn't seem to be a ton of information about malignant narcissism out there. It's a type of narcissism that includes all the traits you'd expect from standard narcissism (profound insecurity, excessive need to admiration, etc.). In addition, malignant narcissists are said to have symptoms of sadism and paranoia as well. Not sadism as in being a jerk and getting off on it. Sadism as in they involuntarily experience legit pleasure, a drug-like high, from being around suffering, whether they directly caused it or not.

I know there is lots of vague, watery information and opinions out there about narcissists, much of it from people who aren't mental health experts. I'm interested in hopefully finding more legitimate info about this particular type of narcissist, or hearing from people who sincerely believe they've dealt with one.

I have been married to a malignant narcissist for 20yrs an you can't even begin to grasp at how evil an cruel a person can truly be. Once He made sure I had no possible way of leaving, His cruelty was so bad people thought I was crazy. I was punished for his mistakes or worse he would place the blame on me so he looked like the victim. His punishments was always taking food,money car from me for weeks leaving me to starve an this went for weeks even months. He took all my money my credit my jobs even my cars opened bank accounts in my name forging my child support checks to open them. His doesn't want sex from me to him I'm disgusting an fat an how much better the other women are in bed than me.. what's sad is he tells everyone I won't have sex with him an it's not right that he has to go without. We been married 20ish yrs an he has been unfaithful with any woman that would have him. I never know what's about to blow up an everyday I'm told how bad I am an worthless an he can't wait to leave a find a new life knowing his abuse has effected my health to extreme degrees. He made me blind in my left eye, I was bullied into all the heavy lifting made to do everything while he did nothing he refused to get me health insurance nor would he pay for me to have anything fixed and he thinks it's hilarious that he had made sure when he leaves I will be homeless. Even my kids ho along with him because he causes a scene if it's not his way. I dumpster dive for my clothes an what ever household stuff I find because he only buys for himself an when I got good at finding stuff then I was a hoarder so I was forced to give up what little I had. The stress is so bad my hair stopped growing 7yrs ago I can't lose weight even though I rarely eat. Everything I've said so far is vanilla, even I have a hard time believing what I lived thru an he keeps pushing