Preparation For Trauma Therapy

[allitherapy]

lam, I agree it is important and helpful to have a stable and supportive home environment. It certainly makes doing the work a lot easier knowing that you have a safe place to go home to. All I am saying is that it isn't impossible to do trauma therapy without those things. I don't have those things and I have made incredible progress in processing through my traumas. I have done this with my ability to rely on myself, my coping skills, and with the help from my wonderful therapist. The work has just been much, much more difficult to do than if I had a safe place to call home, a strong support system, etc. But my point is, it can be done... it's just harder. I'm not disagreeing with you at all; I wish I had all of those things, but I also find it extremely empowering to know that I can face my traumas head on in spite of everything else. It might not work for everyone; that depends on individual coping skills, stability, etc., but it has worked for me.

 

[anthony]

Would anyone happen to have suggestions of how to proceed if one cannot get all those conditions?

As per Alli stated... you can do it, but you simply have to commit yourself to the process and not do stupid shit like threaten to kill yourself, try and kill yourself, OD, etc... These are the primary reasons most therapist won't do much with people in both the severe and complex ranges, because the patient gives in too easily. Some get some balls and see it through, persist... the majority don't, hence the problem at that level of distress.

Its once again, a choice and a commitment to that choice.

In a perfect world, we would all have a stable environment and an excellent support system.

Its primarily about, first, safety, then, raising the odds for the patient to finish the process, and not drop out like a majority do when it starts getting a bit tough. The reason why those with severe or complex PTSD aren't chosen in studies or used for assessments, is because they have the highest rate of giving up when the going gets tough.

Yes, I agree completely with your statements on how you have done it... and the person has to be ready. This is why the course here who has such a high success rate has such a high success rate, because they ensure every participant clearly demonstrates prior their willingness to complete the process by having to meet specific criteria prior to the course.

 

[Tinyflame]

Thank you both, to be honest allitherapy to live alone would be to me a 'stable and supportive (as in supporting 'healing') home environment', I wish I had that, but yes I agree, one has to work around the alternatives/ realities. I also do not tell anyone but really don't see a problem with that, nor do I have supportive family. I think the increased coping skills would always be necessary and useful, and hey if you get opportunities to 'practise' them, maybe that's a good thing, right? Perhaps one just has to recognize their limitations and keep working up to it. 'Stuff' happens, it passes, right? Maybe just takes longer to find balance and get back on your feet, figuratively speaking.

 

[anthony]

Yep, I actually agree, that living alone is just as a supportive environment for trauma therapy, because it gives you a safety zone for yourself, a buffer from the world to enable you to deal with the fallout. Living alone would be easier than living with someone for trauma therapy if you have made the self commitment to see it through, as your stressor intake from relationships, children, friends, family, etc, aren't upon you adding to your cup, at the very moment you are trying to reduce the cup of stress.

 

[Tinyflame]

Thank you Anthony, yes I think I have the balls and even despite obstacles (nothwithstanding 'myself' sometimes the worst one) I have motivation, but I think I am my own worst enemy in terms of giving up when I seem to have no energy or strength left. I think subconsciously I'm afraid nothing will work, anyway- and yes you can kick my arse for that one, I agree!

- guess the not givng up means also to proceed forward or ride out those thoughts (ignore them).
(Hey, I am going to keep your "stupid shit" quote as a personal motivator, if that's ok

)

 

[Iam]

(Hey, I am going to keep your "stupid shit" quote as a personal motivator, if that's ok ;))

Haha, That's exactly what I thought when I read it Junebug! A great motivator as is "these are the primary reasons most therapist won't do much with people in both the severe and complex ranges, because the patient gives in too easily. Some get some balls and see it through, persist... the majority don't".

If someone tells me I can't do something, or probably won't succeed, watch out! I want to have the balls to see it thru. And so far Junebug.....you have proven you do. Your still here, still working on it, still persisting

 

[Deleted member 5760]

I live alone too. Although at times I feel envious of people who have others around them constantly, it does mean I have complete control over my environment. That said, I was getting so stir crazy in these four walls that I spent the last week staying elsewhere because I just had to get out. For me, staying with my family I think would cause a lot more harm than good. But I'm also pretty used to being self reliant.

I agree alli that a person has to be willing to do the hard work in order to heal. That is the first prerequisite. Of course nobody can prevent all stressors, unless you are checked into a facility that completely isolates you.

I think if you're suicidal or need serious substance abuse treatment that is the answer. In my case I was diagnosed in a hospital (wasn't there for either of those reasons). I'm fairly sure the psychiatrist got me out of there as quickly as possible because it was not a non stressful environment. For example, I had a nurse come into my room one night and tell me not to worry about the guy across the hall who would yell out every time I passed his room, etc. I think they diagnosed me and got me out of there asap. But I wasn't suicidal.

On my really bad days I actually have had moments where I've thought 'ohhhh screw this, I'm gonna go check myself in'. Why haven't I? Because basically in my case I can't see the benefits. I'd just be placing myself in an environment with more stressors than here. Here I have control over when I sleep, eat, the tv remote (hehe), my daily activities, contact/non contact with others. I'd lose a lot of that if I checked myself in.

 

[anthony]

There was information I was reviewing the other day, and even the mental health industry agrees that its failed to learn how to handle these cases, because it approaches patients with a caring, supportive, nurturing attitude, which they are starting to see is a hindrance for PTSD patients. Yahoo... finally they're just starting to grasp what this forum has always been about, in that you cannot support any type of sympathetic approach to a PTSD patient that is severe or complex... it doesn't work. You have to put it to them, bluntly, what they are dealing with, what is going to happen if they proceed, the level of distress they will achieve, etc etc etc...

Their recommendations, funnily enough, seem to be similar to what this forum has been doing for years now... being they believe a harder approach is going to be needed, along with a complete change in how they perform exposure therapy, ie. it can't work in the office or sending a person of to achieve tasks... they won't do it or they will give up the moment it gets a little tough. There is zero chance of recovery approaching PTSD in the manner they have been, beyond oh... the simple cases for lesser PTSD severity... the ones they love using for statistical purposes in healing.

Their starting to look for answers from those who suffer and heal vs. academics who sit around theorizing about everything.

 

[allitherapy]

I don't know. I have severe/complex PTSD and my supportive, nurturing therapist is what has gotten me out of my darker days. There is only empathy with her, not sympathy. Sympathy never helps. I think if my therapist were to be overly blunt with me about things early on, it would have hurt me more than it helped. I needed the nurturing, loving support that I should have received years ago and my therapist giving that to me is what has gotten me through. I think treating PTSD is very much a case by case basis, as everyone is different, their traumas are different, and the way traumas affect them are different. I think an important thing about trauma therapy is knowing your limits, being able to convey those to your therapist, while also having an awareness of your abilities.

 

[Happy Head]

Wow reading everyone’s testimony about having a good T and taking their time to get everything else straightened out before hashing out the trauma has really hit home. My T has done this but never really told me what he was doing. It makes complete sense to me now… maybe it’s partly my fault for not asking questions, or partly his fault for not being more clear about his approach but regardless it sounds like what he is doing is the right thing to do.

 

[Iam]

I needed the nurturing, loving support that I should have received years ago and my therapist giving that to me is what has gotten me through. I think treating PTSD is very much a case by case basis, as everyone is different, their traumas are different, and the way traumas affect them are different. I think an important thing about trauma therapy is knowing your limits, being able to convey those to your therapist, while also having an awareness of your abilities.

I couldn't agree more Alli. My trauma T seems to be a combination of nurturing, compassionate empathy and being very straight forward. I appreciate both sides. I have been shocked into reality by her on a couple of occasions. It was tough, but very much needed. She has also made me laugh out loud with no doubt about it comments. I don't like beating around the bush at all and sometimes feel this is what my primary T does. When I first started with him the gentle touch was definitely what I needed. Now I find that he does not push hard enough. I need a firm kick in the ass every now and then.

 

[anthony]

When I first started with him the gentle touch was definitely what I needed. Now I find that he does not push hard enough. I need a firm kick in the ass every now and then. :eek:

This is how it should be... any beginning has a starting, but that is not trauma therapy. When you physically get into the guts of trauma, that is where pushing combined with empathetic approaches is required. The statistics right now demonstrate extremely high dropout rates, which are a direct reflection on therapist techniques failing, ie. they attempt to use nurturing the entire time, when it fails to work on trauma. The mix must be right... constantly balanced, push, retract, push, retract, rest, push, etc...

I could never stress enough that if any person doesn't have this, you can't imagine the injustice you are doing for yourself without it, regardless how good you think you have it with a therapist... if you have severe or complex PTSD, then you are doing yourself an injustice without that essential mix required from trauma specialists.