What Is The One Thing You Wish People Knew/ Understood About Ptsd Or Trauma?

[Froggie]

I may look healthy on the outside but I am far from it on the inside.

I totally agree, that is what I have found the hardest to deal with as there were no "visible wounds / handicaps" that would permit people to better understand that something is wrong and hurting a PTSDer.

 

[Loveneverfails]

That the occasional gloomy bad day does not make me an 'emo kid' or a negative person, it means I'm having a bad day.

 

[Metamorphasis]

Ten days or so ago a new friend who loves & respects me gave me a heavy talking to along "snap out of it" lines, accusing me of wanting people to feel sorry for me. I still feel crushed. She thought she was passing on helpful insights & being genuinely compassionate.

Her absolute conviction that she had to pass on what she felt she knew is a terrible obstacle in what could be a solid connection. She has experience of trauma, but never developed PTSD. The only thing she was right about is that fear is ruining my life.

She doesn't get that I experience this as horrible physical symptoms, not an emotion I could choose to let go of... I love it that she sees beauty, power & tremendous potential in me & was moved to share that, but hate it that she put her frustration about my underachieving back on me.

I am ill, not sooky. I worked hard & long to make myself do tough things I knew were necessary. And now I can't. I didn't choose to fall apart, or give up, or become weak & helpless for some melodramatic payoff. I was so strong for so long, & then willpower couldn't do it anymore.

I hate it that people don't get this. I hate it especially when they think they do, & think you have to listen to their view for your own good. A hard knock from a friend is so much harder than casual indifference from smug & ignorant strangers. I literally didn't feel able to say anything. Just cried, confirming her "insight."

I have a good understanding of how all this works, what's happening & why, & how progress is painful at times & incremental. At times it's so hard to go on. This is one of them.

 

[Chincho]

PTSD Is walking death; it is disabling.

If only they would understand this...

 

[NarcSis]

That I lived 38 years as a person with solid grounding and balance until trauma disrupted that and I cannot be that person anymore, it is fact. I will be who I need to be and function how I need to function in order to get through another day. I do not need to be judged based on who I was before, that person is gone, let her go.

 

[Deleted member 14359]

I might look okay, smiling, laughing and joking but I am not. I am actually screaming on the inside. And that 'dazing into space' and 'day dreaming' - that is me dissasociating. You all know this because you have been told by me or someone else who knows what is going on so stop mentioning it.

There are those who know and treat me differently, dare not to talk to me incase they upset me. I just wish they would be their normal selves...I am not 'special', 'not here' etc and stop talking about me.

For those who know I have PTSD and the symptoms will understand that you should not probe me so, stop asking me why I have PTSD. It is none of your business and if I wanted to tell you, I would. Besides, if I did tell them - it would not change anything because they can not help me...I am the only one who can help me with the support from those I have chosen for support.

 

[Deleted member 14359]

When I have plucked up the courage to speak to 'you' about what I am going through and what my trauma is, do not interupt me. I might not get another brave chance like that again for some time!:mad:

 

[Tinyflame]

That I cannot relate to or imagine, or have never had, for almost as long as I can remember, a concept of safety, or things working out, or a sense of much security in the present (nor therefore the future). That evidence or experiences to the contrary are surprising and hard to trust that they are real or will last.

 

[Tinyflame]

That people talk about traimas as helping one to not take things and people for granted, but traumas cause more losses and 'trauma' than they do make one feel just glad to be alive.

 

[Tinyflame]

That it almost always feels like a tragedy will hit, even when cognitively you are telling yourself otherwise.
The feeling is there.

That it makes (me) feel and worry I'm 'contagious', somehow will or am -what is the word? Beyond a burden, shouldn't be here.

 

[Hashi]

That I'm often more wound up the day before therapy than I am the day afterwards.

That I have enough to do, processing my own reactions to what happened. You falling apart over it isn't something I can make better - that's what therapists are for.

That if you suggest there are things to be grateful for, I will push you out of the window.

 

[Bubba]

That isolating and shutting people out is NORMAL PTSD reaction. I can't stand it when people insist that "they" are different and shouldn't be shut out. I don't care who you are. When I need to be alone - I NEED TO BE ALONE!! It doesn't matter who you are.