Angry outbursts

[Cufflinks]

I have taken my anger out on my wife. With most people I can be very dismissive if they make me angry but with my wife it was different. Why did I take it out on the one person I needed most in my life. The thing is that I would apologize and consider the argument over and done with once we made up. I finally realized that it wasn't just an argument or a series or arguments. I have a real anger management issue. What a chump. I'm now actively seeking help to deal with this.

 

[sorcha]

Thank you everyone. I have been arguing again, I had to walk away, it was my parents, apparently there is nothing wrong with me, it's my medication, GP has just said I have PTSD, because he had nothing else to say and many people have been beat up with baseball bats an ran over and they have no problems, so I need to stop taking my sleeping pills amytriptiline and everything will be fine again (according to my parents).

I have thought this also, but then I look at my symptoms and compare them to PTSD and I have these things happening to me... I have to cry like a baby until my son comes home.

Maybe I should stop these pills and all will be fine

 

[Britt.f7]

I have taken my anger out on my wife

Sometimes it is easier to take it out on those we love because we trust them. It seems safer. It is very unfortunate for them. I think I have a stronger personality with my husband then anyone else. He's definitely safe to me. I am glad that you are seeking help for this. I know, for me, after a while someone apologizing to me over and over again for doing the same hurtful thing to me causes me to stop believing in the apology. I want them to show me in actions.

Maybe I should stop these pills and all will be fine

Were things fine before the meds? I do know that some meds can make a person more prone to anger. My mom had that happen with Wellbutrin and, trust me, she didn't need anything making her more volatile then she already was.

 

[sorcha]

Not really, I was on Mitrazipine, they helped me sleep but they also made meet eat sugar, the more sugar the better, and my dreams were more vivid, I have terrible tinnitus right now, it is with me from 2am-6amish...and I don't know what to do anymore, spoke to mum again, she is sick of me, she thought I would leave ex, have counseling then get better, I haven't - I'm worse. Well my situation is better, mentally not better. Sadly.

I was on these before, I was fine well stronger, I left my ex when on these, in secret, took out injunction, hid I had done this lived with him whilst it went to court, then ran away the day it was served is was asking him to leave, 11 week later he left, I moved home, I was okay-ish, then I started counselling moved house and everything is messy now, especially my head.

 

[Britt.f7]

Mitrazipine, they helped me sleep but they also made meet eat suga

I was on Remron too, same thing as Mitrazipine. In the beginning it seemed fine, but you are right it makes you sugar crazy! All I wanted was sweets. Forget the healthy stuff. I immediately had them wean me off it. It was horrible.

then I started counselling moved house and everything is messy now, especially my head.

First, forget what your mother said. I know, easier said then done. Then, cut yourself slack. It is very stressful to leave a marriage(even if it is what is better for you), and to move. Even if these are positive things, the act of doing either causes stress. I know, with stress, my other stuff gets worse, physically and mentally. Talk to your doctor's to adjust your meds because the one's you are now on are not working as they should. It took me quite some time to get mine adjusted. Though I believe my NP was just slow in making changes for the most part. Despite how bleak I was doing. It's hard to stand up for yourself but I know you can do it.

Hang in there. I wish you strength.

 

[Cufflinks]

Sometimes it is easier to take it out on those we love because we trust them. It seems safer. It is very unfortunate for them. I think I have a stronger personality with my husband then anyone else. He's definitely safe to me. I am glad that you are seeking help for this. I know, for me, after a while someone apologizing to me over and over again for doing the same hurtful thing to me causes me to stop believing in the apology. I want them to show me in actions.

In the past 9 days I have owned up to PTSD, seen my GP and told him I need help, been registered with the local mental health team, registered with Combat Stress, informed my work of my position, booked an assessment with the British Association of Anger Management and arranged for a short course of therapy to deal with the warning signs and coping strategies of getting angry. Not much more I can do in that space of time....oh, and I've given up drinking!

 

[sorcha]

Thank you again, I am thinking of going back on them tomorrow much as I detest the sugar/food/raid a fridge in 5 minutes part of them, but this is awful. I will speak to the GP tomorrow, sadly again he is a 'locum' he cut me back on diazepman by not concentrating on a computer, so I don't have much faith in them, I feel I have to ask them for what I want and I don't know. I would like the noise in my ears to be quiet, lose some anger (big problems up to 10 times per day - just terrible grumpy), sleep more, dream less and lose some stress, I may just say that,see how I go...:)

 

[Britt.f7]

Not much more I can do in that space of time

I would think not! Boy, those are definitely accomplishments you should pat yourself on the back for! Just amazing! I would call all those life choices a positive! :)

I would like the noise in my ears to be quiet

My husband has tinnitus on a constant basis. I did, once find an herbal supplement specifically for that. Unfortunately I don't remember the name.

It's important to speak up. I finally did that with my nurse practitioner. Did take me quite awhile. But, when you look at it, it is your body you are putting these meds in. You should have a say in it. I would do it at your next appointment. I definitely waited too long to do it. Especially since I'm feeling better now that I spoke up and we adjusted some things. This was with his guidance, but also with my wishes. He has told me over the months that he wants me to have say, that that was important. Still, it took me three months or so to finally be assertive. I think, by that time, I was way too tired of things not working. Good luck! Let me know how it goes.

 

[Cufflinks]

I would think not! Boy, those are definitely accomplishments you should pat yourself on the back for! Just amazing! I would call all those life choices a positive! :)

I am in a determined place rather than a positive place and I know that the whole pile of cards is going to cave in at some stage. I have to get through this divorce stuff. I wish my wife would just concentrate on the good times and see that I'm as much of a victim as she is but...

 

[Britt.f7]

see that I'm as much of a victim as she is but

You can't help what people think. She is probably too much in the hurt and loss stage to see anything else right now. I wish you peace.

 

[sorcha]

I visited a Locum GP today, it went as planned. He started with 'how can I help you today and how have you been?'
me: You cut my diazepam last week so not great, I was biting my 5mg in half and ended up ill by Sunday.

Locum: I don't remember cutting you down

Me: No you said you not going to then did

Locum: Oh dear sorry about that

Me: (silence)

Locum: Any thing else

Me: Yes my head will not be quiet, tinnitus I am thinking, I am also depressed, do not want to go out and cannot sleep and am angry with everyone

Locum: Hmmm I think you have had a bad cold and that's what is wrong (checks ears)

Me: It is not in my ears it is in my head

Locum: Yes which ear is worst.....

Me: No ear is worst!!! my head is noisy, amytripyline do work eventually but only for 4 hours and I am exhausted and depressed and my head is noisy, louder at night, I need sleep

Locum: I suggest steaming at night to clear your sinuses.....

Me: (feeling very slightly angry) Okay forget about the noise I am way to anxious, give me something for this please, my clock fell of the wall last night and I almost had a panic attack, everything is noisy, I had to move my bed as cars were scaring me at night

Locum: Have you tried Prozac?

Me: Many times, my head is going at 190mph here do you not think they would make me run around like the Duracell Bunny? and over think more than I am?

Locum: Hmmmmm

Me: Can i see psychiatrist please they can help my head if I have PTSD?

Locum: No, they will send you to a psychologist

Me: Okay, so what will I do, amytriptiline are not working I am anxious, depressed, angry and tired?

Locum: Lets me look at computer.. hmm mental health, yes you have been on a few pills haven't you

Me: Yes, can you put me back on Chlopromizine please, I slept on those

Locum: No they are a sedative

Me: I need to sleep and lose some anxiety please, my parents are annoying the life out of me and I think I may going MAD again

Locum: Parents don't seem very helpful

Me: No, no-one is....physiologist is terrible

Locum: It takes a few time to see them before they work

Me: What now then?

Locum: Hmmmmm, so you have been on Venlafaxine and prozac and seroxat and ... and .... and .....Mitrazipine what about them?

Me: Yes, if that's all you can come up with then yes, fine, I hate them but just give me them, if they will knock me out, they make my dreams worse though, so I guess I will just put up with nightmares and get fat......

Locum: I cannot knock you out you have 2 boys, I will give you 15mg, they will not help your anxiety for another 5 weeks but you should be able to sleep in a few night time....

Me: Yes thanks great help!! bye bye

Locum: Yes, definitely a psychologist for PTSD ......

So back on fat pills again, I detest Locums and Doctors, that Locum is a few qualifications short of a Doctor imo

 

[KatB]

A lot of my anger can be directed to the ppl who have hurt me, but at times, I let it out on those who did no physical or emotional harm but weren't around when I was alone. Misdirected anger? Yeah. That's when i feel the most horrible.

Someone said that they were never an angry person and now, its the major issue.I can sooo relate to you.