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What To Never Say To A Ptsd Sufferer

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I love this thread!

Tired of the Fight - I am so sorry. I have 3 kids and I know just what it's like, feeling guilty and wanting to do everything for them and not being able to. And then someone comes along and makes it worse! I'm so sorry! Hang in there.

How 'bout this one... my family never lets me talk about my traumas. They say it's because they don't want to see me upset. When I try, they immediately change the subject. But one day, I actually got one member of my family to listen to me give a very abbreviated version of my traumas and how much I was hurting and how I just wished someone would give me a little sympathy, how I wished someone would care. And guess what she said... NOTHING! She sat there, patted my hand for 30 seconds and then changed the subject to her and her life. That's it! I almost wish someone would say something to me, because saying NOTHING is worse!
 
"You will work it out. You always do." That was the answer I received from my Occupational Therapist when I told him about about a problem I was having with a counseling referral. It is next to impossible for me to ask for help, and now I want to crawl into a hole. I wish he knew how upset I am, and that I was hurt by his indifference.
 
I get these comments almost daily from my finance's mother......its REALLY hard not to let it get to me, most times it does get to me. When people say things like this to me it makes me feel like I am being irrational or immature or that I am just weak and really should just get over it...it makes the whole experience worse... it has been so bad that I actually took leave from work and have been looked down on for it since I made the choice to do it, she constantly tells me I need to go back to work and that I should just move on..."life goes on, get over it" I try to explain to her I made the choice to take time off to be a better person for myself and her son and that her son helped me realize I am worth more and she shuts me up before I can get it all out cause I am just wrong and that is the end of the conversation ....I hate it! A LOT ! but then I remember who it is coming from ....someone with unresolved issues and a drinking problem. Gotta shut those voices out as hard as it is, the people who matter are the people who support you and my finance supports me, we love each other and he understands his mom and I may never really connect and is perfectly okay with that.
 
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