What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

[KP the nut]

I'm struggling today. Hubby has left for Saudi Arabia on business, he will be back next week. He was stressed about going and had a few last minute hassles one of which resulted in him taking my phone as his isn't working.

Neither of us slept last night. I am left feeling tearful and I have started shaking again which is something I did have under control. Everything feels like such a huge task and I can't help but be constantly vigilant, worrying that something bad is going to happen.

I hate feeling like this. It is another reminder that the PTSD cup can overflow.

 

[Britt.f7]

I feel like crawling back into bed. I know it is the anxiety and depression this time,not my chronic illness. I can tell because I don't feel sick, nor really tired. I just don't want to deal with the reality that is my life. Money issues. My husband works so hard, I can't because of disability, but it really shouldn't be so difficult to make ends meet. Yet it is. I don't like some of the choices he is making regarding like dipping into our retirement funds to make ends meet. There has to be a better way. There is where the anxiety lies.

I will not climb back into bed. Have to remind myself that the thoughts will just follow me there.

 

[DharmaGirl]

I'm feeling tired, and on the outside calm. On the inside I'm screaming and about to fall apart. I feel excited because I will plant more perennials in my cottage garden today.

 

[DMerish]

Somewhat refreshed/normal from getting good sleep the last few nights, but also nauseous from beginning meds again. Looking forward (sort of) to cleaning up a lot of crap around my place this weekend that I haven't had the energy to deal with over the last several months.

 

[KP the nut]

I survived the day and done what I needed, only one job left and I'll do that after this post.

I made myself go to the gym and I'm proud of myself for going, even though I didn't do as much as usual, only 20 minutes on equipment instead of 30+ minutes. I rewarded myself by going for a swim and then relaxing in the spa pool.

I began to relax as I drove home. That is until a refuse truck tried to pull into my lane when I was on the space. Immediate panic as my PTSD was triggered by a car crash with a truck. I had to pull over until I composed myself - thank goodness for essential lemon oil.

Okay, last job of the day. I will go and walk the dogs. On the plus side, all this exercise means I can have a glass of wine tonight.

 

[DMerish]

You're an inspiration KP!

 

[therisa]

Am feeling very emotional, and reacting strongly, to other's feelings, in a sad way. Like I experience during my depressions.

 

[Deleted member 6617]

Feel like curling up in a ball and crying. Feel like the little girl who just wanted to be held but couldn't ask or tell why. Feel very at odds with myself. I foresee some hibernation this weekend.

 

[therisa]

Am so sorry, Pottershand. I understand and feel like that myself, at times.

 

[DMerish]

Am so sorry, Pottershand. I understand and feel like that myself, at times.

Most of us feel like that at times. Take good care of yourself and hibernate if you need to; it's pretty much what I'll do this weekend.

 

[KP the nut]

You're an inspiration KP

Thank you (((DM))). I don't think inspiration, I'm just bloody tenacious ;)

 

[KP the nut]

I foresee some hibernation this weekend.

Yep, me as well. A little hibernation is fine. I'm thinking of it as allowing myself time and space to self heal:)