What To Do About Therapy

[Phenioxrising]

I am the Alter of this person. She has DID. But is not yet Dx'ed. I really want someone's opinion.

Do others experience nothing but the feeling of defeat when going to T. I really want to help my "host".

But know they can only do so much. She doesn't have many friends but people will always be judgmental of her. I just want her to have a good friend. But groups are not our style.

I really like older people for there maturity. But that's not the point. I know that this looks pointless. But what can we do to get along better with out fighting on whats the right path. We're confused as what direction to go. But I like her and want her to date. Cause I want a child for her in the future. I have no problem w/ society. It's the other way around for us.

 

[Alfred.Greene]

The best part of life is that you have to find your own answers. They most often won't find you, and if your looking for a man you need to consider the kind of man you want, and if your really ready for that. I suggest trying to improve yourself makes you more valueable to your date, gives you confidence, and it takes away the free time that can be quite scary.

Feel free to send me a PM, good luck!

 

[Leah123]

Remember, the feeling of defeat or hopelessness is only a feeling. Try and treat feelings like clouds in the sky: part of the weather, but not the end-all of reality, just passing events.

The goals you have, friendships, romantic relationships and children are all worthwhile goals.

Therapy can help you in ways you don't anticipate, you kinda have to go there and do it to see what you can get out of it. :)

You don't have to be 100% committed for therapy to help you. Most of us aren't, DID or not. :) Growth isn't about perfection: it's about purposefully feeding our strengths. It is a sign of strength to reach out for help in building better relationships.

 

[Powder]

I want to help but I don't know enough yet to offer much help to you.

For one thing, how do you know you have DID if not diagnosed? I am not being pedantic here; I believe people do and can know long before their therapist does.

For one thing, you might have DDNOS or I believe there is a slight differentiation between what is lumped together now in the DSM as DID and the orginal MPD. I have read some T's believe that if the split occurs before age 7 it is actually more MPD than DID with some slight differences in how to treat it. This article is his, and it's is his professional opinion. He has not been agreed with by the APA or the whole group. Many are interested in his work, but there is not enough studies done to support his contention that MPD exists and DID is a variant with older onset. Link Removed

I have read his whole site. I find it helpful and inspiring in some ways. I would not worry about the murders because that is a set of cases he worked on that involved an internalized imaginary friend. Those guys (all were male) killed early on in life, early 20's and are very, very rare.

Hope this helps, Muse

 

[NovemberStar]

I have never been diagnosed with DID either. There have been times in my life I have really really wondered if I have it or not. I've realised what it is is that I have different emotional states - and sometimes (when under extreme stress) these emotional states FEEL separate. It's like being in the back of a bus, watching different passengers take over the role of driving the bus I'm sitting in the back seat watching the different drivers take control of the bus. It's when I am pretty badly dissociated, and it's really felt like I will lose my mind completely and blackout - and not know who or where I am.

When I'm experiencing those strong emotional states it is frightening and I worry 'what if this is DID?' Sometimes I've really beloved I do have it, and have been so afraid of telling anyone least they label me and stop working with me. Or just as bad - telling me 'oh don't be ridiculous, you don't have DID!'.

Im now pretty sure I don't have it. I do have dissociation and sometimes it is pretty bad.

Don't know if you relate or not. But whether or not you have DID you definitely need to talk to yr T and be totally honest with her / him about what is going on for you.

It's the only way you can get the right support and treatment (regardless if a label or not)

 

[joeylittle]

Do others experience nothing but the feeling of defeat when going to T. I really want to help my "host".

While therapy can be really difficult and I don't always feel better after, I don't think having a general sense of defeat over and over again represents a good relationship with the Therapist.

The first, most important thing (as everyone has said) is to lay it all on the table with the therapist. Look at it this way: if things are already awful, there's not much to lose. And if the therapist can confirm the self-diagnosis of DID or refer to someone who specializes in that class of disorders, either way things are farther ahead than they were.

I'd recommend focusing on really telling the therapist what is going on, and not worry so much about the children just yet.

 

[Hashi]

If you're able to post on here, I assume you're able to print out your post and take it to the therapist, or send it to them by email, or talk to them about it when you see them. That's my suggestion of what to do.