Am I Being A Prude, Or Overly Sensitive?

[Anarchy]

@Dana1010 do you have first hand experience of the profession?

I confess that I don't, but I know some individuals who do. Work used to take me through Nairobi, and as long as I was up front that there wasn't any business, I got to chat to quite a few working girls and boys there, I also knew some transvestites who were on the game to raise funds for the [ch]operation.

You appear to be taking stereotypes and extrapolating from those stereotypes to create some sort of homogeneous aggregate, and throwing that aggregate at males in general.

your line of reasoning is unlikely to get you very far, There are likely to be as many reasons for people to go into modelling, porn and sex work as there are for people to go into any other line of gainful activity,

and, like any other line of work, it might just be an occasional thing, or a sideline, rather than a full time occupation.

nude modelling, porn and sex work are not exclusively female activities, and I don't think that there is any simple way to address an area that is so diverse, or all of the various attitudes to the area of activity and the people who engage in it.

 

[RussH]

To all who have been responding to this thread: First of all, from the originator of the thread, thank you for all of your responses. Now allow me to ask that you please be respectful of each other and not attack one another. Yes, disagree and debate, but please do so in a respectful manner.

The original intent of this post was not to vilify models or sex workers, but rather the industries that will exploit, and objectify people for profit.

When we, as a society, allows political groups or business groups objectify people for political, or profit gain, then we are opening the door for societal abuse of said people.

Does one picture do this? No, but consider this: The final line in the movie "Gone with the Wind" was Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn" It was the first time profanity was used in American movies. Was it incredibly profane? No. Did it open the door for incredibly profane things to be done in American movies? Yes.

 

[Dana1010]

do you have first hand experience of the profession?

I detect a bit of a prurient, peeping Tom undertone to this question, but I'll take the bait. I've been acquainted with a couple of dancers over the years, as well as some non dancers who knew dancers. One was a college educated girl from a middle class background. She was on her second or third date with a guy she met dancing who was all about stripping while he was in the club. He pulled her aside halfway through his party, and said, "Here. I'll show you the door. Let's not get carried away." He never went out with her again. A similar thing happened to another girl who was on a date with a guy who said he had no problem with her dancing. He just decided on their third date that he didn't want to be with a stripper,and looked at her and said, "You need to go." As for their coworkers, if they were in a relationship at all, it was always with a guy who was vastly beneath them--it was astonishing how low stripping had brought their stock down.

And mind you, those are just strippers. The situation must be vastly worse when there is actual sex involved.

 

[Ronin]

I detect a bit of a prurient, peeping Tom undertone to this question, but I'll take the bait.

I'm not sensing any. There was no bait, there was just a honest question about generic background, where it's relevant to seeing where one's coming from, experience & opinion wise.

I've been acquainted with a couple of dancers over the years

You aren't in their shoes though, still. Nor would you know if they feel maltreated, or if they feel these men were just being the usual pricks they're used to deal with, or if there was harm involved, emotional or else.

And mind you, those are just strippers. The situation must be vastly worse when there is actual sex involved.

Ah, the hierarchy of good sex worker x bad sex worker. Eventually honorable dancer x bad, bad prostitute.

Not all the situations that are about control are worse than some other just because of these hierarchies. It doesn't help to promote that idea.

 

[Dana1010]

@Kaia, you're shooting the messenger. I guess if you don't like someone's conclusions, you can always find fault with their methodology.

 

[Ronin]

@Kaia, you're shooting the messenger. I guess if you don't like someone's conclusions, you can always find fault with their methodology.

And you're not answering any of the points that were raised, by anyone, instead derail.
You also managed to insist a decent man like @Anarchy is an exploitative a-hole, and you made no efforts to apologize for that insinuation. That really isn't polite manners. So don't act like you're owed anything when it's you who's been crossing the lines here.

 

[Dana1010]

@Kaia, what have I not answered?

BTW, I know the women above felt maltreated, and knew the incidents were directly linked to their jobs because they told me.

 

[scout86]

I guess if you don't like someone's conclusions, you can always find fault with their methodology.

The point of questioning the methodology might be that poor methodology can lead to faulty conclusions. You could probably use a larger and more representative sample size.

I don't really have a dog in this hunt. I think people ought to be able to earn a living doing pretty much what ever they want. I also think they should treat each other with respect. I think @Eleanor was right. It's a big world and most things exist along continuums..

 

[Ed Norton]

I also have known plenty of women who enjoy watching porn. I'm not obsessed with it, but I look at it. Just because I do, doesn't mean that I'm a lecherous, perverted predator as is being implied. Not all men are. Not all women are victims either.

 

[Dana1010]

doesn't mean that I'm a lecherous, perverted predator as is being implied.

Nowhere was this implied. Nor was it implied that the women were all "victims"--simply that they've placed themselves between a bullet and a target, wittingly or not. Maybe they're into that.

 

[Ed Norton]

Some of your statements do seem to insinuate exactly what I am saying. I'm not sure how to quote from my phone. Perhaps I'm reading you the wrong way. You can elaborate if you wish.

 

[J_trustno1]

I am going to have to agree with @RussH somewhat but disagree with some things. A lot of the cases the rape happens when someone has sick-thinking have grown up in an environment/home where women are treated with dis-respect. A lot of these men who commit rape have twisted thinking and believe that they can get away with raping a woman just because she wore these cloths. However, what about rapes committed on women who are fully covered? I come from a country where women are repressed, people cry over a birth of a female child and celebrate a son's birth, girls are always treated like the third class citizens (I am an example of this!!), they do foeticidie inside the womb upon knowing the gender of the child and if it is a girl they kill her before being born!!

The dressing sense itself doesn't cause as much problem as the environment and their mind-sets do. I am going to share a documentary on the most brutal rape case that had happened in India on the 16th December 2012 here: http://urbanasian.com/whats-happenin/2015/03/bbc-releases-indias-daughter-on-youtube/

These rapists are not guilty of their crime because they feel that it is their right to teach the woman their lesson and true value because they see men as being superior and women being piece of crap whom they can do anything to. You are more than welcomed to watch this documentary if you like and I was shedding tears seeing her parents suffering after she died from what was done to her.

Yes, I agree with one point that female dressing provocatively do somehow show themselves as objects. I don't mind women dressing fancy and being lady like but there needs to be some modesty in their dressing sense. Some women who have low self-esteem do tend to compare themselves to those fit women and try copying them. Yes, young men and even some pathetic perverts also get wrong signals when the lady is dressed in certain way but who are they judge what one should dress like and not? Everyone on this earth has the right to choose what to wear but for myself I will personally value modesty and elegance over showing every bit of my skin (for me it's for someone special to see).