Sufferer 10 Years Untreated.

[civilian survivor]

I was recently diagnosed with ptsd. About 10 years ago my older brother passed away 3 hours after I left his room. The morning he was found, my little brother went to wake him up for breakfast. I was woken up shortly there after and tried and tried my hardest to wake him up. He was too far gone to save. This continues to haunt me to day. My current diagnosis is PTSD, GAD, Panic disorder, depression, and mild OCD. I really feel like there is alot of care and respect for the soldiers that go and serve their country, and come back psychologically torn to shreds. I respect these people and wish them a speedy recovery, but this makes me feel like people forget, that there are those of us who have this disorder who didn't sign up for the risk. They just had something terrible happen to them. I was one of these people. I didn't think I could have ptsd because I had never fought in a war. Once I was diagnosed, I began to try to find others like me because my family doesn't believe in my diagnosis. They don't want to believe the things I go through everyday, just trying to live a normal life. I am currently married, because I managed to find someone to put up with me through good and bad, but even then, there are days it seems she doesn't understand. I would like to hear from other civilian survivors who may have felt this way as well. Also I would like to hear the opinions of those who served on civilians with ptsd. I know this is not a very good introduction, but it is my first attempt at reaching out.

 

[heartists]

I didn't think I could have ptsd because I had never fought in a war. Once I was diagnosed, I began to try to find others like me because my family doesn't believe in my diagnosis. They don't want to believe the things I go through everyday, just trying to live a normal life.

I can really relate to this, although my PTSD cause is different, I also relate to being in denial about it "because I had never fought in a war" and there is that stigma. I also know a woman that went through a similar experience (seeing death of family) who has PTSD.
Your PTSD is definitely real - Ive had to do a lot of work on validating my own experiences and how they've affected me.
I hope you find some of the support you need here.

 

[Friday]

Welcome to the forums, CS.

Also I would like to hear the opinions of those who served on civilians with ptsd.

Combat Vet, here. Personally? I don't give a damn. PTSD is PTSD. I care about individuals & kicking knowledge. Not whether the monster under your bed is spiky or slimy.

 

[StarChild]

Good morning @civilian survivor. Please know, that you're very welcome on this PTSD board. As you'll see, the members here are from around the world. We don't differentiate nor compare our PTSD's. Be it from sexual or physical child abuse, rape, abduction, domestic violence, violent felony, natural disasters, or combat. And the list goes on... So, you see, it just is, what it is. Oh, and to develop PTSD is not a sign of weakness. PTSD is the normal reaction of the brain to an abnormal situation. So you don't have to be ashamed for having it.

I'm very sorry to read, that you lost your brother at such a young age. Are you supported now (in a therapy and / or medical treatment)? I just want you to know, that you're not alone in this, and that you're not "awkward" or whatever. - And as for your family; People who don't have PTSD, often have quite a bit difficulties to get what it is and what it means, to have to live with PTSD. And some, well...might never understand it. Or simply won't.

But that doesn't mean, that you can't improve your situation and live a good life. It's possible! It just takes a lot of hard work on yourself (trauma therapy). And it's very helpful to have people, who do understand, and support you on your path of recovery. (Even if it's "just" on an online forum.) So again, welcome to the forum! :tup:

 

[garden]

Welcome. :)

 

[TonyG]

I am a suffer after being a first responder to a multiple fatalities car crash 30 years ago and I was diagnosed September 2014, we all have PTSD and no matter how you got it we all suffer the same.

 

[civilian survivor]

Thank you all for your replies, and your support, and most especially for your understanding and support. I am in therapy now weekly. We have not quite reached the demon of my ptsd, but I am working toward being a mentally healthy individual. I don't quite understand how this works, but I will continue to post and try help.

 

[Deleted member 20280]

Buddy, there are those of us who signed up for combat, with the full knowledge of just what lay ahead for us. You like you say were a silent victim in all that. I wish you comfort here on the forum and a speedy recovery in your personal PTSD journey.

Sending you a UK :hug: if you accept it mate

Laurie

And like many here I too have Civilian Trauma coupled with Military PTSD.

 

[intothelight]

@civilian survivor Welcome and this is one place where no one judges the "why" or "how" an individual develops PTSD. Trauma is trauma and some people develop the disorder and others don't. This is a place to focus on recovery and living the best life possible.

 

[Ghostybear73]

Welcome to the forum :)