Advice For A Civilian Counselor-in-training?

[nlk22]

Hello everyone,

I am seeking some advice. I am currently a graduate student in a masters program for counseling. Soon, I will begin an internship at a local Vet Center. I will be doing supervised counseling with veterans and will work with many people who have been diagnosed with PTSD, as well many other mental illnesses, issues, and struggles. However, I am a civilian. I am wondering if anyone can shed some light on how I, a civilian, can truly help a veteran heal. I understand the benefits of having a counselor who is also a veteran and I also understand that some vet clients I will see may be hesitant to trust me due to my non-veteran status. Is there anything I can do to connect with the people I will help in the near future? Is there anything I should stay away from, or not do, or not say? I do not want to be ignorant to the difficulties I may face by not being a veteran. I want to be prepared; I do not want to hurt anyone through my learning process. I also would not want this issue to get in the way of my being able to help someone, and I am fearful that may be the case at times.
In my eyes, this situation is similar to that of an addict who is in counseling. Often, addicts only wish to work with a counselor who is also a recovering addict. This makes the counselor more relatable, which is huge, and can be a massive benefit in the counseling process. However, I am unfortunately unable to provide the similar past that a veteran counselor would have with a veteran client.
I do have 2.5 years of clinical experience, as a crisis worker, where I was faced with the whole gamut of mental health issues. Many of the clients I worked with during this time had been through horrible trauma's. Through my experience as a crisis worker, I feel that I am not easily tormented by the stories I have been told; I feel this has prepared me sufficiently to listen non-judgmentally. I know that a counselor who "can't handle it" when a client recounts a trauma is often not effective, and leaves the client questioning if they can trust the counselor, which is one of the biggest factors in therapy. The relationship between the client and counselor is of utmost importance!
I am hoping to be able to truly connect with the people I will work with over the next several months, but I am also anxious about the things I have mentioned here. If anyone can offer advice for me or previous experiences that were or were not helpful in therapy, I would appreciate it to the end of the earth!
Thank you!

 

[Jimmy1]

Gidday,

Firstly it would have been nice for you to use your real name. It is the most important thing as a counselor.

Anyway, I am going to head some people off at the pass before you get a nasty response.

If you are truly a student and are going to be working at a veteran center, then be prepared for some anger and abuse from veterans who are not in control. Veterans don't play nice with people and will tell you how it is. They are suspicious of everything and everyone.

Also, if you are intelligent you would have read through the forum rules first up, and you would have seen that it is a veterans only community. You are not a veteran, so you should have approached this differently. Maybe contact the site administrator and ask permission to post.

This site is full of veterans from all over the globe and from conflicts dating back to Vietnam. Some of the members don't have facilities available and some have untreated PTSD symptoms such and anger, depression, etc, etc.

Normally they would just tell you to F#$K Off.

You will probably be banned, however, if you wish to ask questions, go via the site admin, Anthony.

Cheers

 

[nlk22]

Thank you, Jimmy. I appreciate your honesty. I did not include my name because I had signed up for a different forum a few months ago using my name and was told it was inappropriate. I will take your thoughts to heart and try to find what I am looking for from a less exclusive community. I apologize if I have offended you or anyone!

 

[Anglesachse]

............Normally they would just tell you to F#$K Off............

Ahh come on Jimmy, we aint that bad are we.

I have been pretty sarcastic with the last 2, right up untill the point I told them to F*ck off.

........................ I understand the benefits of having a counselor who is also a veteran and I also understand that some vet clients I will see may be hesitant to trust me due to my non-veteran status. Is there anything I can do to connect with the people I will help in the near future? Is there anything I should stay away from, or not do, or not say? I do not want to be ignorant to the difficulties I may face by not being a veteran. I want to be prepared; I do not want to hurt anyone through my learning process. I also would not want this issue to get in the way of my being able to help someone, and I am fearful that may be the case at times.................

Why does everybody these days have to take short cuts? what ever happened to learning by doing, and learning from your own mistakes. There is so much info out there about PTSD and other dissorders, laying the ground out before you as to the symptoms and all the rest.

As for dealing with a Trauma sufferer, everybody is different and reacts to every different.

What has happend to the generations that done the hard work to get the job done

........................ I am hoping to be able to truly connect with the people I will work with over the next several months, but I am also anxious about the things I have mentioned here. If anyone can offer advice for me or previous experiences that were or were not helpful in therapy, I would appreciate it to the end of the earth! Thank you!

Best way to connect? join up and do your time. No civvie can ever understand what Military life is about, the way we think, the way we tick even has a different sound.

And knowing that you`ll be back under another user from a different PC.

F*ck off

 

[JarHed]

No civvie can ever understand what Military life is about, the way we think, the way we tick even has a different sound.

Hey Angle

I agree with you completely on that statement. However I do know that one does not have to be a combat vet to treat vets with PTSD. My therapist is highly qualified. PHD, has her own private practice as well as what she does with vets at the VA, Also teaches at a local university. She really cares and wants to help. She never assumes that because she's a doctor that she understands everything. Although I was skeptical at first, as we all are, that she could actually help me, she earned my trust. That's something I don't just give away.

I've seen many Doctors in the VA system for the many areas that I need treatment, both physically and mentally. Not one is a vet, but they are all experts in their given fields. My concern is that they will be able to help me with the problem that I have, that's my primary concern.

Just because someone was in the military doesn't quickly qualify them in my book. There's good and bad both in and out of service.

Jar

 

[Anglesachse]

Spot on Granpa, I meant only the Understanding and conecting aspect can`t be given you have to learn it.

My therapist was a civvie, great lass, fair, kind, helping, and a kick in the ass when you needed it. I have seen 2 Military Therapist in my time. Couldn`t get on with either. just no chemistry there. but Mrs B. guess it was just the experience, which she collected over time, that and here personality.

Becoming an expert takes time and effort, and does not entail coming on here with "Hi, can you tell me how I need to treat you guys" oh man f*ck off and learn you lazy bitch.

Lazy and boneidle people just realy get my goat.

 

[JarHed]

Spot on Angle,

Unfortunately this will always be a place that will attract people that don't fit the qualifications for what ever their reasons. Think we're pretty good at spotting them although if they read the requirements to post here it would sure be a lot easier.

Jar

 

[Squaddiedave]

Know the ban has happened already but I have to say it
Piss of, get your boots dusty, meet the beast then come back till then f*ck off

 

[Jimmy1]

I can understand your response to people who don't belong and are just trying to be members, but she was different in a way. She was not a journalist, she was not a spouse, she was someone that some people on here might meet one day.

Your guys are the first to whine when you go to the VA and the shrinks have no idea. At least she was trying, that is why I was polite. Sometimes you guys can be real f*cking idiots.

She does not have to deploy to learn about PTSD. She was actually quite smart coming and asking those with real issues.

 

[Zipperhead]

I've been trying to not comment on these interlopers for a while now. Having said that, everyone thinks they should be the exception. And even though some may have a more valid reason then the other, they are still invading.

I remember once someone suggesting that a student go down to a local vet centre are learn first hand from those that wish to participate. It made allot of sense to me. Here on the Forum some of us have posted "enlightening" details in the members only section. You have to be a member to see it. As this is a Veteran Only Community that implies that only those who have been there can read it. You can't blame the guys when they get upset that outsiders are peaking.

Yes this is the internet. Yes there is no safe place on the internet. But as long as we don't see it, well, let's face it. We delude ourselves into believing that this place is differant. It's our place. It's safe. How do we keep it that way? Well, we Troll anybody that doesn't belong here. We fight back to keep it ours. You can't blame the guys for reacting like this. It's the only way we can try to keep it safe.

 

[Jimmy1]

I don't disagree at all with that Zip, and I get pissed with partners and others that think they belong and don't. I also get annoyed with journalists and therapists with their solution to PTSD.

I just think that the one's coming for advice should be guided to a more useful place to gain info that can help them when they work at the VA.

There is no exception to the rule though. Not a veteran, ban them. I did report her anyway.

 

[Anglesachse]

I do get where you are coming from Jimmy, one of us could at some poiont be sat opposite her.

It is just like Zip said, the site is for us. And we have had it before that when you are polite and helpfull they hang around even longer, replying to as many post as possible. Yes they get banned sooner or later because one of us with report it to Anthony, but untill he has the time and gets round to it they just carry on.

I would also like to think that the lass in question has logged back on under a new user name, and is reading this and see`s that we live by rules. Rules that are dear to us and that we don`t like people who disrespect or ignore the rules that we need.
That alone is a lesson she has learnt here and can include in her therapies. But on the other hand there are so many would be therapist who want a free ride, and want to take the fast road to where they are going.

And at the end of the day all we want, are therapists we are comfortable with. Yeah some might have resignations if they are not a Vet. But 9 times out of 10 all we need is chemistry to feel safe. All she needs to do is, not pretend to understand us or try and connect. She needs to be herself, and the Vet sitting opposite will either accept her or not for who she is and not for who she is pretending to be.

She also has 2,5 years Clinical experience, as a crisis worker, where in here own words " was faced with the whole gamut of mental health issues. Many of the clients I worked with during this time had been through horrible trauma's". So I guess she hasn`t learnt to talk and deal with people in that time.

Sorry cocker, but they way I see it, she said she is a counsellor who can handle it, so she knows what she needs to do, she has experience, so either she was lazy from day one and hasn`t learnt or she is after something else.