Ambivalent suicidal thinking

[Justmehere]

A trigger lead to a fear of trauma, suffering happening again.. and a fear death caused by another.

My triggered symptoms include a lot of suicidal thoughts.

Anyone else experience this ironic duo of being terrified about imminently dying at the hands of another and also wanting to die?

 

[hithere]

yes, it's kind of the story of my life for a long, long time.

 

[ButterflyBean]

Yes, I have an intense fear of dying because of medical trauma, and I have concurrent, passive suicidal ideation almost every day. When I’m in an acute crisis, they last for about a week or two straight. My inner child uses the thoughts to express herself because she doesn’t have the language and/or vocabulary to verbalize her feelings.

 

[Freida]

Yep. Always afraid I'm going to get shot in the head which is bad. But if I do it myself it's different. Makes my brain hurt!

 

[The Albatross]

Sounds like a lot of overthinking to me. Cuz every durned time a real situation hit... no matter what I thought I fought my ass off to keep breathin'. That shut down a lot of that stuff for me. Not recommending a few real time situations to show ya which way the mop really flop though.

 

[Gs172003]

I think it has to do with having control of our own fate instead of something or somebody else

 

[Justmehere]

Thanks for letting me know I’m not alone in this! I had a doctor get upset at me that it was impossible to have flashbacks about life threatening trauma and be terrified of life ending assault happening as if the abuser is back (they are not) and yet also be suicidal at the same time. And yeah, I get why he is confused...

 

[macbeth]

Yes that's me.