Judging. Oh do I have a
TON to say about judging as its a huge part of my life but I will try my very best to keep it to a bare min. to just get my point across.
Ok, so there's judging and then there's this:
"If you keep doing what you're doing, you're going to die. Frankly, you're scaring me."
Caring in a non-judgmental way actually as he wasnt judging you as a person or even your actions per sey, he was worried about your saftey, thats caring. Therefore,
@atwistedfate, if you are living a reckless life and he said it in a way like "cut it out or i will stop talking to you" then he 1) cares, 2) is either trying to 'shock' you out of it or just plainly cant stick around to see a friend kill themselves. Ive been on both sides of that.
Then there is judging that we all do for saftey
but there is the judging in which is an action and in which one can take the opposite action...its a choice.
So yes, we judge whom we sit next to, walk beside, talk to, go near, etc and that is primative for saftey and these are usually not even conscience. Im speaking human instict so speaking "I" as in a non-traumatized person. I dont spend time holding up the bus to look at every single person and then decide by some way that one person looks safe enough or at a party i dont look at each and every single guest or even the ones in my sight and watch their body laungage and then figure out which one(s) would be good to talk to. We have a human instinct that we rely on to quickly scan and quickly find the person that feels, sounds, looks safer etc.
But then there's judging. I judged you because you happen to go to the bar/pub with your friends every weekend so you must be an alcoholic and have an issue; when in reality you endlessly work 2 jobs or very long hrs or study for classes in college all day and all night in the week days and on your first chance you can get on the weekend you want to do something fun. I judge that you wear certian clothes that show a bit of skin so you must be easy when in reality you just like the style and you're a virgin or dont sleep around. Etc etc etc. This is why racism is so strong still, judging people due to skin color. Judging someone for their religon etc.
That kind of judging you can stop, it is a choice. You can think maybe she just wants to have fun every now and then she dresses that way because she's confident with herself and her body. You can choose to not judge, to think those alternatives instead or nothing at all. Thats what I call judging and its done to me by my entire family.
Just my 2 cents
ETA: I'm forever going back & forth about this with my family. They are all Christians and I point out you shouldn't judge in many places in the Bible and they all default to "everyone judges". No, thats a choice.
