Anyone Else Get Anxious Right Before Appointments?

[Pogonip]

I am newly diagnosed and started a basic PTSD group class about four weeks ago. I have found that I start getting very nervous the night before the class. This eight week class is just the beginning of my recovery journey. I'm worried about when I get to the harder stuff, trauma processing, of how I will react and cope. Anyone else experience this and how did you cope?

 

[sonickel77]

Yes I get anxious before appointments. Sometimes to the point where I don't go, get numb on benzos, or go in there wrapped in a blanket, and end up sitting in the corner behind the chair so he can't see me! Sorry don't have any answers. Going back to him next week after several months away and I am nervous!

 

[anni]

Oh well, there aren't any easy answers except to just accept that exposure therapy absolutely, positively works. The facts across the board tell one that and one knows that with THAT kind of evidence it just has to be so! :) No, one can't tell it by me. I know, however, that there's nothing at all unusual about myself beyond having allowed avoidance to get completely out of control through 20 years of neglect.I know it WILL work so keep at it. Avoidance. It's what happens when one allows that anxiety and dread to win. You're not, and as hard as it is, since it hasn't been as long you'll 'win' a LOT quicker! I still have awfull anxiety when logging in here and it's been months. I do it as early in the morning as I can, while still foggy and can'trick' myself into both the routine and into just DOING it. :) It's finally some easier but not always and not a huge amount.Other avoided things, which grew over time, still suck and my life is a long series of managing these. It's quite ridiculous, and will not go into it except to say that 'they' are being worked on. I answered this since this IS the extreme of allowing that first, avoided 'thing', all those years ago.I gave myself the comfort of an'out', then another and another, etc. You can't talk yourself out of the dread, either since you need something to make sense logically to do that, and at this point none of this makes sense. You have a huge amount of positives on your side to keep the momentum going, however. Things are simpler, you can pinpoint more of your anxiety and dread, and perhaps bring yourself to just work through those first moments and get to that other side much more quickly.

It's wonderful to have set up these meetings, too! I wish I'd thought to do something so very logical, and perhaps worked this out of my system 20 years ago. Please do know that the exposure 'thing' really, really does work, across the board, and it'll get easier soon for you. It's at least something to have that knowledge while you're working through the discomfort to 'the other side'. Let us know what it's like from there. :)

Anni

 

[kris]

Yes, I get nervous for my therapy sessions still sometimes not as much as others but the butterflies are still there. I also have irritable bowel syndrome, so once the nervousness kicks in so does the unsettled stomach, so I try not to stress to much about the appointments. I have been in counseling for 8 months and the anxiety is less than when I first started, but like I said occasionally it kicks into high gear and I don't want to go.

I have never canceled or just didn't show up because no matter how much I don't want to go, I know that skipping out isn't going to help in the long run and is just delaying my progress. Sometimes though when I do go, I do not feel so much like being there and talking but I do it, I do the dang therapy stuff because it is the only way to get better. I have been living this life with so much bad energy and emotions and attitude, that it has gotten me nowhere. I have wanted to kill myself numerous times, and I know that I need help to get through this, just like everyone else. PTSD is a wicked disease and to try and suffer through it on your own is just plain dumb imo. There is so much help out there for one this website and so many good therapists, yes it might be tough finding a good one, and therapy isn't always easy, but take it from someone who really really really did not believe in therapy and talking about ones feelings, it does work.

Some days even with therapy you might feel like shit, some days will be better, but one has to remember in the end, the good days will far outweigh the bad and once your done with therapy even the bad days won't be so bad because you will have coping skills to make life that much easier. WOW I can't believe I just wrote that, I guess therapy is helping me because when I first went I thought it was a bunch of bull and a way for lazy people to make money, cuz all they had to do was sit and talk to people all day. Man was I wrong.

 

[kers]

I'm like you, kris, I have IBS issues before every single therapy session. I've been going for YEARS. It's just how my body works out its anxiety, unfortunately. Like you, it has decreased in time, and being able to go and do my therapy work in spite of it its actually a triumphant feeling. My relationship to the anxiety has changed a lot and I don't feel as dominated by it.

Pogonip, it has helped me to develop some rituals that I do before therapy, like using a certain perfume (the smell is relaxing) and sitting in my car, listening to classical music, practicing my deep breathing.

 

[Artista]

I can relate. I used to have some issues with IBS-like symptoms because I get anxious. Now I tend to run before my long drive there. I am probably not "usual" in that I drive over an hour to my T. I am a mom of young kids and appreciate the alone time driving there as part of my processing it or preparing (plus my T is worth the drive because I trust her!). I listen to music too.

Depending on the things I need to work on or talk about, I can feel my heart start to race after I park and walk there. I have used some of my time beforehand if I get there early, to calm myself and say some mantras. Focus on the positive times I've had and hope that day will be one of them. Although I have had moments of fear, usually it has had positive results in the end. I just try my best for it to be a good thing to me. I even allow myself time to chill after if I can before the ride home. That feels like a luxury to me. This is in a large city so I'll walk around and take myself out of all the dread I feel, if just for an hour or so. It is one reason I drive that far... it feels safe and not like my usual environment. Keeps me on my toes and focused on this being special and just for me. Even though it is hard work, I try to make it an enriching day too. Not always easy or possible, but I try.

 

[kris]

I don't have to drive an hour to my therapy appointments, but I do have about a 20 minute drive and usually the drive into the appointments make me more anxious and I just want to get it over with. The drive home on the other hand is a very good way for me to regain my strength/nerves or whatever else. Usually I turn the radio up loud and just cruise on home, in a blanked out state, I couldn't even tell you how I got home. If I didn't have that drive though to calm me in its on way I don't know what I would do. The radio up loud helps me to get all the thoughts from therapy out of my head. I try to leave them at the office, and not deal with them until I am at my next appointment or when I get home and can write about them. Writing my thoughts down before I go to bed has really helped me, it helps me to sleep better and to have less nightmares.

 

[Deleted member 5760]

Yes, I get nervous too. It's like a very 50/50 feeling. I really really wanna go - because afterwards I know I've moved forward with each session. But it's like a high followed by a crash - followed by that tennis ball thrown into the cube. I haven't cancelled yet. And I wont. My last one was early in the morning - and I just put myself on autopilot getting up and dressed and ready. But that feeling that is going 'you know you could just cancel' is beginning to be turned down. It's just fear talking and I know that. Maybe even fear of positive change (not very logical - but eh?).

But I think a positive sign is this. I was sitting in the waiting room and there's a sign up saying if you have cold or flu symptoms to cancel. And inside my head I kinda thought 'ahhh, there's an out. If I'm ever really incapable I'll just call and cough a lot into the phone'. I think I jumped on that thought and laughed at it before it had even finished speaking. That's probably a good sign that I actually really want to be there.

 

[PainX2]

Yes I sure do. I try and just focus on my deep breathing and clear my mind. Some days are better than others that's for sure, depends how fragile I'm feeling.

 

[TroyW]

Yes I get very very nervous and over excited not fun when I show to groups its about 15 min early so I get my seat I need routine to stay distracted