Anyone Else Hate Their Birthday?

[Zurrealx98]

So I'm turning 18 tomorrow. I always feel conflicted on my birthday. I feel so uncomfortable when people congratulate me or make a fuss about it. Not sure why. Anybody else the same?

 

[Riot]

Yup.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

My birthday marks the worst days in my entire trauma. Yep, I hate it.

 

[Rey324]

Mine is a huge trigger for me. My main abuser (mom) I found passed away day b4 my birthday. She was 46. 20 yrs later and next week I am now turning 46.

 

[Renestel]

To all , this could potentially trigger some--
Yeah, youre not alone for sure. I grew up in a family where everyone made a huge deal about birthdays and I had a really hard time understanding when i really got close to my husband and his family why they treated it like the plague. Come to find out when his mom was young her uncle called her to wish her a happy birthday and shot himself on the phone as she was listening. Epic. Horrible. She would never celebrate a birthday again. Sad for her four kids growing up, but totally understandable why its just too much for her even if it ts not hers.

 

[gealach]

Absolutely!!!!!!! I don't acknowledge it, I don't tell anyone about it, I don't celebrate it.

 

[Seasounds]

Yes, especially if I am depressed; trying to celebrate when I'm not doing well compounds my problems;

At the very least, I want some special small dinner, but I don't want to have to socialize. No way to winwith me.

Sincerely, I hope you create the kind of day you want to have, (get the atmosphere you want), at least for part of the day.

 

[Friday]

I don't hate my birthday, but I do hate being the obligatory center of attention :wtf: Especially for something outside my area of control. It makes my teeth itch.

***

But I'm also something of a hedonist. I looooooove celebrating, and excuses to celebrate. So while I hate any kind of attention on my actual birthday? I love and adore using my birthday as an excuse to go off on an adventure & drag people with me :sneaky: As long as it's nowhere near the actual date. As it's not my actual birthday? There's no obligation on their part. It's just a week in the mountains playing in the snow, or a week at the beach building sand castles & flying kites, come up for a day or three if you've got the time! Would love to have you!. (Aka Winter or Summer stuff... When my birthday is in the spring). And would just as much love it if I'm solo the whole time.

(#TrustIssues; I despise depending on other people. Including showing up. If I'm not okay with someone not coming? I don't invite them. Which may sound backwards, but I'm weird. If it's not life or death? There's no obligation. If I'm adding an obligation, then I start viewing the whole thing as life or death. When. It's. Not. So to combat the f*cked up places my head or heart goes, I have to be really solid in this = no debt. No obligation. Just me, inviting you, because I'd love to see you. Because I want you. Not because I need you.)

It just removes all the pressure, and ickyness, and paying attention to the calendar (double yuck, date specific things piss me off in general; calendars & I do not get on) and let's me play. My actual birthday, I don't tell anyone about, and as a rule I'm not allowed to plan for until the day of (except to cancel everything and completely free it up, if possible), and then I do whatever the hell I want, when I want, all day long. Whether that's marathon movies in bed, or get dolled up and go out dancing. No stress. Pura Vida.

 

[Panda Bear]

Always....all holidays and celebrations.

 

[BuckarooBanzai]

I celebrate my birthday my own way - whichever way feels right to me at the time - and so don't experience this problem.

Sometimes, I even bake or buy my own cake, light the candles, and sing Happy Birthday to myself all alone, LOL.

I find this approach empowering.

 

[Phantom Shadow]

Yes I am like many others on here. I hate my birthday also. My is Christmas Day. But I hate it because everyone is looking and graduating me an what not. I hate the feeling of being the center of attention an having people over or parties of any kind. An yes it is part of my PTSD paranoid part that is. I fight within myself. I do want it but can't handle it when it is happening and worry about it before an after that I did not react correctly or say the right words at the time. An I just turned 60.