I think I innerstand. After totally/drastically changing my entire lifestyle for health reasons, initially, and after experiencing miraculous-to-me overall wellness benefits from doing so, I ended up questioning and looking much deeper into everything else that I'd been taught/conditioned to believe/feel. The changes I made for the health of it soon included many ethical reasons, too, as I continued to dive deeper and see what I'd never took time to look at before, mainly because I didn't think I needed to.
I had plenty of time to do research since I'd become damn near bed ridden as my health was rapidly declining. Prior to reaching that point, I had just assumed the information I was receiving from various professional sources/familial sources/authority figures/school/religious figures/etc. was legit/safe/well-rounded/proven effective/in everyone's best interest/etc., based on what I'd been taught to believe.
The more I learned, the more I felt like I'd been punked, big time, in the most basic of arenas, especially once I tried and lived the opposite of what I'd been taught and experienced and sustained major overall improvements by doing so. How could all of that harmful information/stuff still be considered acceptable, much less "the norm", is beyond me. I had to learn how to unlearn while still actively learning, and found it to be rather difficult at first, but eventually discovered just how critical it is. I've also come to realize and accept that I'll never be considered "normal" in this existence, and I'm learning to take that as a compliment. lol That thought used to cripple and paralyze me beyond action.
I had also assumed that once I acquired knowledge that helped me so greatly, others would be anxious to hear about it and wishing to eagerly learn similar things, especially those who suffered from very similar symptoms and such. But instead, I found that many didn't want to hear any details about what I'd learned, especially diet related stuff dealing with animal products/caffeine/alcohol/artificially created stuff. The same information that set me free within my own being has also managed to make me a prisoner, of sorts, due to having very few, if any options in the social/mainstream scene that offer up the types of things that can actually healthily nurture life.
So many AFGO (Another F'n Growth Opportunity) moments, so little time and energy to explore them all. But when I do....I'm usually damn glad I did. Trying to comfortably co-exist as a highly sensitive canary in the proverbial coal mine of life and trying to more healthily exist while being constantly surrounded by a sea of tox-sick-city is a challenging gig. But then again, so was conveniently ignoring all of what I've since learned while trying to simply exist in my former life as a morbidly obese miserable middle-aged woman mostly bed-ridden in severe emotional and physical pain and such. It's an ongoing struggle no matter which road we choose, it seems. Struggle Management....the never ending juggling routine we all partake in, whether we wish to or not. I hope that's in the same vein of what you were meaning. If not, my apologies for rambling on.
