Kadoodles 23
New Here
Hello everyone,
I have a similiar story. I am the girlfriend of a fellow guy who has ptsd. Our relationship started out amazing, we met spent the night together and talked non stop and had a wonderful conversation spent Sunday night at dinner and had a few drinks and then Monday morning I had gallbladder surgery I woke up that morning to text messages from him that he had wanted to see me before I went into surgery I had said no a few times and by that time I was like sure why not.
He stayed there with me the whole time said he had missed me was glad to see me. I woke up from recovery and there he was waiting with me mom amd hadnt left the waiting room. My mom was the one who took me home to watch over me the next couple days. Guess who came home and wanted to watch over me as well. Over the next few days we spent alot of time together. It was then that I started falling in love with him. He wasnt like any other guy I had ever dated, I was Happy for once in my life. Things went excellent from there. We have only been together for a month in a half but it sure does feel like alot longer then that. Hes my bestfriend and brings a smile to my face everytime I see him.
He has opened up a little bit and told me some of the things that he had went through since he had been on 3 tours and was the leader in all the tours and lost people over there. I never would ask about anything I felt that if he wanted to talk about it he would be the one to bring stuff up and he has. Well 2 weeks ago was the first time that he shut me out. I didnt really understand why? It scared me cuz I hadnt heard from him, I contacted his brother to make sure he was alright, and come to find out he had broke his phone after receiving a phone call from one of his fellow army friends that somebody in his pack had been killed in Iraq. He had explained to me that is what happens when PTSD effects him is that he completely shuts down.
Things have been pretty good since then. this last weekend he had said he was going to spend time with the family and I said ok have fun, sent him a few messages randomly saying I had missed him and once again no response, but he was updating Facebook with random pics he found on the internet, mostly military related. I got a little bit upset that I didnt talk to him but was fine, I talked to him a little bit on Sunday and he had said he needed some time with his family I told him that I loved him and to text me whenever.
Monday morning I woke up and had a weird feeling so I took a pregnancy test, said positive, waited a few hours and took another one, faint line but still positive. I sent him a message asking if i could come and get my books from his house for school and by the time he responded I was already home, so went to class and then called the doc to be seen and then went to the gym. He was there, you could tell there was something different. I went and did my own thing. He saw me before he left and I said hey can I talk to you before you leave. I followed him outside and didnt want to tell him but said IM PREGNANT. He didnt say much, told me he loved me and that he had to go do errands and he would see me later to bring my books to me.
IN the mean time the doctor was able to get me in and confirmed that I was pregnant. After getting off work he had messaged me asking what the doctor said, told him I would rather tell him in person, went and saw him and showed him the paper. He was still in shock and kinda distant and didnt say too much which isnt him at all.
In the beginning of our relationship he said that he was ready for kids and he couldnt wait til we had one and wanted there to be a serious future with us, (we had not been trying at all, the doctor told me that with everything going on the chances of me actually getting pregnant were low and i was having cysts rupture monthly so that made the % go down further). I left his house and 5mins later he sent me a message saying there was a problem. I called him to talk and thats when things went downhill in a hurry. First he started off by saying that he needed some time and space and I told him that was understandable and that even I was still in shock. Then he kept saying how he doesnt know what he wants now and hes not sure if hes going to move to cali to help his dad out or what. The conversation kept getting worse. It ended with him telling me that he didnt want to be with me and that he wasnt happy and even told me that when hes with me he wants to be somewhere else. He told me to get some sleep and we would talk more tomorrow. I was completely in shock just 3 days ago we were laughing and having a good time, cuddled up and inseparable, we had talked about getting a house together so the 3 of us, me him and my 4yr old could live together and BAMMM like a brick wall he says this?
What do I do? How do I take this? Is this what the ptsd really does? Do I just give him his space and not talk to him for a few days? Weeks? Any input would be gladly appreciated.
I have a similiar story. I am the girlfriend of a fellow guy who has ptsd. Our relationship started out amazing, we met spent the night together and talked non stop and had a wonderful conversation spent Sunday night at dinner and had a few drinks and then Monday morning I had gallbladder surgery I woke up that morning to text messages from him that he had wanted to see me before I went into surgery I had said no a few times and by that time I was like sure why not.
He stayed there with me the whole time said he had missed me was glad to see me. I woke up from recovery and there he was waiting with me mom amd hadnt left the waiting room. My mom was the one who took me home to watch over me the next couple days. Guess who came home and wanted to watch over me as well. Over the next few days we spent alot of time together. It was then that I started falling in love with him. He wasnt like any other guy I had ever dated, I was Happy for once in my life. Things went excellent from there. We have only been together for a month in a half but it sure does feel like alot longer then that. Hes my bestfriend and brings a smile to my face everytime I see him.
He has opened up a little bit and told me some of the things that he had went through since he had been on 3 tours and was the leader in all the tours and lost people over there. I never would ask about anything I felt that if he wanted to talk about it he would be the one to bring stuff up and he has. Well 2 weeks ago was the first time that he shut me out. I didnt really understand why? It scared me cuz I hadnt heard from him, I contacted his brother to make sure he was alright, and come to find out he had broke his phone after receiving a phone call from one of his fellow army friends that somebody in his pack had been killed in Iraq. He had explained to me that is what happens when PTSD effects him is that he completely shuts down.
Things have been pretty good since then. this last weekend he had said he was going to spend time with the family and I said ok have fun, sent him a few messages randomly saying I had missed him and once again no response, but he was updating Facebook with random pics he found on the internet, mostly military related. I got a little bit upset that I didnt talk to him but was fine, I talked to him a little bit on Sunday and he had said he needed some time with his family I told him that I loved him and to text me whenever.
Monday morning I woke up and had a weird feeling so I took a pregnancy test, said positive, waited a few hours and took another one, faint line but still positive. I sent him a message asking if i could come and get my books from his house for school and by the time he responded I was already home, so went to class and then called the doc to be seen and then went to the gym. He was there, you could tell there was something different. I went and did my own thing. He saw me before he left and I said hey can I talk to you before you leave. I followed him outside and didnt want to tell him but said IM PREGNANT. He didnt say much, told me he loved me and that he had to go do errands and he would see me later to bring my books to me.
IN the mean time the doctor was able to get me in and confirmed that I was pregnant. After getting off work he had messaged me asking what the doctor said, told him I would rather tell him in person, went and saw him and showed him the paper. He was still in shock and kinda distant and didnt say too much which isnt him at all.
In the beginning of our relationship he said that he was ready for kids and he couldnt wait til we had one and wanted there to be a serious future with us, (we had not been trying at all, the doctor told me that with everything going on the chances of me actually getting pregnant were low and i was having cysts rupture monthly so that made the % go down further). I left his house and 5mins later he sent me a message saying there was a problem. I called him to talk and thats when things went downhill in a hurry. First he started off by saying that he needed some time and space and I told him that was understandable and that even I was still in shock. Then he kept saying how he doesnt know what he wants now and hes not sure if hes going to move to cali to help his dad out or what. The conversation kept getting worse. It ended with him telling me that he didnt want to be with me and that he wasnt happy and even told me that when hes with me he wants to be somewhere else. He told me to get some sleep and we would talk more tomorrow. I was completely in shock just 3 days ago we were laughing and having a good time, cuddled up and inseparable, we had talked about getting a house together so the 3 of us, me him and my 4yr old could live together and BAMMM like a brick wall he says this?
What do I do? How do I take this? Is this what the ptsd really does? Do I just give him his space and not talk to him for a few days? Weeks? Any input would be gladly appreciated.
