Not sure what to do
New Here
Hi all, something I did in my childhood has just been really haunting me lately and I don’t know how to move past it. This is really shameful and embarrassing to even type so I’m so sorry to anyone who even might be reading this. But when I was 11/12 and my brother was 2/3 (huge age difference) I asked him to touch me through my underwear as a massage or something. I have no idea what was going through my mind but i do know that I stopped it after like 3 seconds.. which to be fair.. 3 seconds is a long time.
Anyways it just happened that once, but I don’t know how to move on past that or forgive myself or if I’m even worthy of forgiving myself..
I feel like such a monster. And I’ve always been one to HATE rapists and child abusers.. I feel personally victimized whenever I hear the stories.. so to remember that I did something similar.. makes me the worst person in my eyes.
Is there any way forward through something like this? I just don’t know
Anyways it just happened that once, but I don’t know how to move on past that or forgive myself or if I’m even worthy of forgiving myself..
I feel like such a monster. And I’ve always been one to HATE rapists and child abusers.. I feel personally victimized whenever I hear the stories.. so to remember that I did something similar.. makes me the worst person in my eyes.
Is there any way forward through something like this? I just don’t know