Connecting with people is a trigger

[Seychelle]

I really don't want to start this thread, but I'm making myself do it as a very first baby step in trying to desensitise from this particular trigger. It's very hard to write this and I am getting dizzy.

I find it much much easier to face up to physical and sexual abuse memories - I know how to work through them to gradually desensitise to them. The emotional control triggers (eg starvation fears, which I started a thread about a while back, and this one about connecting to people) are much harder for me to work through. They're not attached to any particular trauma memories - it was just all-pervasive growing up.

Just wondering if anyone else has connecting with people as a trigger? I've recently learnt how to (occasionally) connect with my OH. I don't really connect with anyone else, although I have friends etc. I never learnt how to do it growing up - I didn't even connect to any of my toys as a child. If I try to now, I get terrified and badly triggered.

 

[iluvcaffeine]

Hi :) I have a similar issue. Falling in love triggered me bad. It was one of the most difficult things I went through in my entire life. It was definitely an internal war inside me. One one hand, love (and all those hormones!) were present. On the other hand, falling in love means giving trust, which triggered me. This was true because in order to trust one must be vulnerable. And if one is vulnerable then they are susceptible to being hurt again...

It takes me a LONG time to form strong friendships as well. I am always stand-offish for a long while.

so, yeah, giving trust is a definite trigger. -- at least for me.