Coping With Anger

[Casey_03]

In addition to what everyone else has already suggested, maybe cleaning? I find it strangely helpful in dealing with anger and rage. It also has the added benefit of making my apartment look nice afterwards.

 

[Friday]

If you haven't read this thread Dealing With Anger or read it recently? Do so :)

 

[Ronin]

maybe cleaning?

This, though if you're compulsive about it or flashbacking mid cleaning, please be careful // have time for pauses.

 

[Ronin]

I'm not really here or really real

You are really real & here.

Real enough to type it out.

Real enough to doubt it. And it's a good thing you are out. Well done.

 

[watundah]

Screaming into a pillow can help.

I hope you're feeling better today.

 

[Chava]

Thanks again for more ideas! :) And caring!

I woke up yesterday and the anger was gone and all replaced by sadness (that's not quite the right word...more like some kind of terror-sad-meltdown). Felt really unreal...like all these days up until now, for years, I was trying to be real or thought maybe I was real, and then woke up and felt like I did not make it...to "real". It was unbearable. Called my therapist and couldn't talk much, but rerouted to just being able to rest a little (also physical pain) and then work on a little grounding art project later.

Now just taking care of pain. I think I hit all the emotional peaks or lows in about 12 hours. System overload. But I didn't get wasted or end up in ER, so I guess that's one good thing. Trying to keep pain and everything else just manageable...able to shut out the situation making me so angry a little better for now...maybe I had to crash and meltdown first. :hungover: But now hopefully able to keep things a little better in check for this week.

 

[Flossy]

@Chava said "System overload. But I didn't get wasted or end up in ER, so I guess that's one good thing."

It's not just one good thing. It's a f###ing HUGE thing. HUGE. Write it up on your wall in chalk, girl and smile every time you look at it. Celebrate it. You did a huge thing. It must be recognised and applauded.

Apart from this, pain is a huge Stressor. I dont remember the source of your physical pain. But, giving yourself permission to manage pain with supervised meds is essential to managing the PTSD. If you have Fibre, there are meds that are not pain meds that work on Fibre. Edronax is one and Pristiq. Somehow they block the over-reactive nerve cells messages.
Both of these are also excellent anti-depressants in my experience.

 

[Chava]

Thank you @Flossy :hug: A couple sources of pain, partially physiological but not perfect explanation for how I experience it. I respond well to nerve pain meds (gabapentin). The pain can clash with other things going on, stress, and lead to meltdown. It seems to happen all together...like I won't have a meltdown if I'm feeling physically good. There is definitely a powerless aspect.

Controlling the pain is key, but sometimes it's hard because I don't want to tip into numb from my meds either (combining tramadol and gabapentin is a little tiny bit la-la land, but if I can get the pain under control everything feels better the next day).

Have not heard of the other meds you mentioned, but thank you. At some point everything seems to quit working for me, but targeting the nerves seems most helpful. Painkillers just help me do my job or not meltdown sometimes. But the right nerve meds help my body feel more "normal" and not even get to the point of so much pain. I really did my best but the stress and anger overwhelmed me at the end of last week. I crashed into feeling unreal and am still there, but managing pain okay and just doing life...a little half-assed. :blackeye::lurking:

 

[Flossy]

@Chava

If you have not had it done, you can ask your doc to test you for Fibromyalgia. There are pressure points on the body that if pressed equate the diagnosis. Fibro is said to be cause unknown, but my experience is that it is directly tied to psychological stress. Most docs agree with that thought but the mechanism is not understood.

Some anti-depressants work on it. Not usually SSRI's, mostly SNRI's. Pristiq and Edronax are both SNRI's.

I know it doesn't feel like it right now, but your self-awareness and intellect will result in you getting control of both the pain and your PTSD eventually.

Maybe it will also help to join a forum on dealing with personalities who trigger you. Eg: narcissistic PD. It helped me.

Really sucks that there are so many factors to getting better. But I guess there are so many factors to life. And they got us unwell.

The one wonderful result of all this learning, especially about PD's is that you will be able to recognise the people who are not compatible with you very early on, before they get in close to you and keep them out of your life. I have to have absolutely no contact with anyone with Narcissistic PD and my life is better for it. I felt guilty at first for judging but I then learned to feel proud that I could gauge who would harm me or use me.

I hope some of this helps.

 

[Lionheart]

Just an FYI....I think it is counter-productive to strike out and hit something when angry as it conditions us to violence when we are upset and feeling rage.

I think the first step is to get the rage down to anger...I don't really know how to do this, but in the past therapy worked; I tore up papers and bought some cheap dishes to break...*(thing is ya have to clean up the mess afterwards, but it helped).

If I can come up with anything else that might be helpful for you I will post again.

Best of luck to you,
Lionheart777

 

[Chava]

Some anti-depressants work on it. Not usually SSRI's, mostly SNRI's. Pristine and Edronax are both SNRI's.

Ah! SNRIs are not really my friends. :( I've tried the major ones (Effexor and wellbutrin, unless that' an NRI...really unhelpful). I tried a tricyclic, amitriptyline, and it kept me awake at night, no matter what time of day I took it. Even lowest dose. Which was too bad because it had a mildly positive effect on my mood and fog/bubble. But I seem to be really sensitive to the serotonin stuff (amitriptyline somewhat close to an SNRI)

If you have not had it done, you can ask your doc to test you for Fibromyalgia.

Have been checked an it's not fibro. But might be similar sensations, though maybe more stabbing. Definitely nerve pain though and probably some very similar triggers to fibro.

Maybe it will also help to join a forum on dealing with personalities who trigger you.

I'm not triggered by personalities. I don't want to talk about the triggers (nothing against anyone here, I'm just too upset and sort of just trying to keep a little distance and not meltdown). I mostly avoid people, but don't seem triggered by any particular personalities...unless like creepy. :wtf: Also, I'm just having a hard time understanding it too. A lot of things I am not happy about and feel like i'm at a tipping point...also feeling a little bit trapped...not many options (escape routes! ) :dead::dead::dead::dead::dead: