No, it doesn't sound stupid. Not at all. You're afraid, that's a real thing.And I know it sounds stupid that I can’t just say that/text that to her.
Exactly - you are responding to something that doesn't have to do with HER - it's got to do with something else, something you can't quite name.I think this whole thing with her at the moment is somehow jangling a lot of stuff for me that I don’t really understand. It feels very stressful.
If you think about it in that context - does the idea of bringing this up with her get any easier?
(BTW - when I've been dealing with things like this, I know that being able to say something out loud was the most challenging option. Writing it down and sharing the writing, that was easiest. Writing down and reading what I wrote, next easiest.)