Relationship Did I Do The Right Thing?

[Sephira]

I agree! I don't know how I didn't see it Nursenurse. Everyone kept telling me to get away, but I'd make excuses and stay. I know I was starting to internalize it, he was starting to make me believe I was truly the problem. I'm going to move on. I know he isn't good for me and I think you are right about his behaviors. As i think back over the years, i see that they were always there but not as pronounced. In a way even though I'm so sad over losing him, this is probably the best thing that could have happened.

 

[Namaste23]

OMG! Run and don't look back. I have recently ended a relationship with a narcissist who was also controlling, verbally abusive and manipulative. Although the relationship didn't last long it left me very confused so I am now trying to figure out how it could've happened to me. I found this forum as apparently those who were narcissistically abused can develop PTSD.

My advice will be to stop thinking about him and concentrate on yourself, try to understand what made you stay in this relationship, work on co-dependancy. There are so many sites and forums where you can find information.

One interesting thing I read about why someone stays in an abusive relationship is Stockholm Syndrome. It's all new to me and I wish I knew it all before.

No one deserves to be abused!

Hope this helps.

 

[Sephira]

God, I was stupid. Stupid. I let him call me this morning. I wanted to tell him that I would not be his gaming buddy. That I realized he would never take responsibility for his actions, was abusive and that I deserved better. His response? He started singing "Hallelujah" and said I finally got it. That he didn't want me or the relationship. I had messed up one too many times. This is the same man that told me he loved and adored me less than a week ago. I'm hurting and in pain, and he seems to be happy and fine. I don't get it. I just can't speak to him for any reason, I realize that now. So insensitive. And you know what the sick, sick thing is? I still love him despite all the abuse. Time for some therapy. *sigh*

I will move on. I will get over him. I will heal and find someone worthy of my love and affection. This is my new mantra.

 

[nursenurse]

Don't answer him ever!!!!!!! Change phone numbers, get a new email, whatever it takes . He is more toxic than Chernobyl.

 

[Kkdawn]

Sephira as much as you say you love him you have to love yourself even more. It's going to be hard since you have been going through this cycle for years. But you really need to seek counseling for yourself.

I had really low self esteem for years and allowed myself to be cheated on and verbally abused. It took me going to counseling and picking my self up to realize I deserve to be treated well. I know it is going to be hard but you have to find a way to block his number and get him out of your life. You have to take care of you.

He's only being a jerk because he knows you will keep taking it and every time you take his calls you keep giving him control of your life. I hope you can get out of this cycle and work on knowing how much you are worth.