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Dissociation? Depersonalization?

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So we ( t and i) talked a little last week about the dissociation at the end of my session. I dissociated just talking about it. I only heard about half of what t said. I admitted that to her today. She was very understanding. We talked more about it today and I was able to stay with her. She checked on me a couple of times to make sure I was with her. It was a really hard session. She said it is going to take time to stop dissociating. She gave me an exercise to do with my husband where I have him start touching me (fully clothed) and when I'm uncomfortable tell him to stop and he has to stop immediately. She said I need to practice saying stop and having that honored because it wasnt as a child or teenager. It makes sense but I dont know if I can do it. I've never told him to stop before. Consciously I know I'm safe with him, but subconsciously apparently my brain feels otherwise. Sorry for rambling.
 
That sounds like a great plan. When touching, I have found it helpful to focus on exactly what my senses tell me (I feel the warmth of my spouse's hand, I feel their fingertips touching the back of my hand, I can feel one of their fingernails ...), rather than what the voices in my head say.
 
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