DID Dissociative parts want out

[Punky143]

Not a good day and most of my parts wish we weren't around. I've been working on trauma stuff. I attempted to contact my T but never heard back and I can't tell you how damaging that is. Rarely do I ever bother sharing it so to reach out was a risk and not hearing back confirms that I am alone. I have been having flashbacks on top of the other stuff dissociation brings and I'm overwhelmed, sad, frustrated and I don't have much positives to tell them/parts. What do other people do when they feel like this? It's awful and isolating and scary.

 

[Ronin]

Okay, for starters, remember where reality is: you're not stuck, that trapped feeling is trauma, depression and what not talking. Not something objective... and definitely not forever. (If you were physically stuck, still not forever. There's people who care for you, look for you, or will be happy to meet you... you only may not have met them yet.)

Your t mighta not get your message, or have a lot going on, and people rarely can respond immediately... things need time. You'll get a reply, and an okay one, just give her a Lil bit of time? ;)

You got this far, even the littlest and most scared of you. You got each others backs good.

What is happening now is you're only waiting for a message. Your t didn't leave you, doesn't hate you, didn't stop caring.

So anybody got ideas how to spend time while you wait? Favorite cartoons, food, toys, games? ;)

It's a bad day, but that day will pass in a few hours. Or the feeling terrible changes. Or something nice happens in the day. You can, also, get better tomorrow, it's OK to not feel ok right now.

 

[Sideways]

I'm overwhelmed, sad, frustrated and I don't have much positives to tell them/parts

These are feeling statements (and awesome job nailing down exactly how you feel in such difficult circumstances).

Communicate that to the team maybe? That you're having these feelings, and they're quite overwhelming.

Because feelings come in waves. This isn't destructive behaviour, it's a shitty place in time where negative emotions have gotten on top of the good and neutral emotions. And they'll pass.

Sometimes communicating that to the team can facilitate better communication. Leading by example, you're letting the team know that it's helpful to share when someone is having a really hard time.

Then second @Ronin 's suggestion. Act in spite of how you feel, and engage those other parts that might be feeling isolated with things that reassure them: even though we're feeling bad, doesn't mean our experience of life right now has to be all bad.

Especially with littles, that can be really reassuring. And for older parts that want to just quit? It demonstrates that you're a reliable leader, even in the tough times.

These difficult emotions make perfect sense given what's happened. Acknowledging them for what they are can sometimes be part of what helps them keep moving, rather than getting stuck.

If everything is just to hard? Simplify. Be gentle with yourself.

 

[talon]

Not a good day and most of my parts wish we weren't around. I've been working on trauma stuff. I attempted to contact my T but never heard back and I can't tell you how damaging that is. Rarely do I ever bother sharing it so to reach out was a risk and not hearing back confirms that I am alone. I have been having flashbacks on top of the other stuff dissociation brings and I'm overwhelmed, sad, frustrated and I don't have much positives to tell them/parts. What do other people do when they feel like this? It's awful and isolating and scary.

when i supported a lady with DID with 20 alters not all of them friendly i encouraged communication with family by using a daily diary if i was not there to be peacemaker . She had a history of seeking abuse as learned behaviour ( revictimization ) and her alters apart from the littles called her a sex toy / fxck toy which resulted in harming. Being able to be peacemaker and educating the alters helped i being able to explain , reassure to create harmony . The two Littles 2yr olds also were peacemakers because they were the historians . Being able to communicate with family when i was not around was helpful once they got used to doing so. sometimes the teen 16 yr old would write something which angered the host such as clean up your shit i look up to you . This caused conflict but in time we came to understand that harmony was possible i being the peacemaker who saw both sides of the argument . I found so called professionals were the problem rather than the solution they in ignorance causing conflict

 

[TruthSeeker]

when i supported a lady with DID with 20 alters not all of them friendly i encouraged communication with family by using a daily diary if i was not there to be peacemaker . She had a history of seeking abuse as learned behaviour ( revictimization ) and her alters apart from the littles called her a sex toy / fxck toy which resulted in harming. Being able to be peacemaker and educating the alters helped i being able to explain , reassure to create harmony . The two Littles 2yr olds also were peacemakers because they were the historians . Being able to communicate with family when i was not around was helpful once they got used to doing so. sometimes the teen 16 yr old would write something which angered the host such as clean up your shit i look up to you . This caused conflict but in time we came to understand that harmony was possible i being the peacemaker who saw both sides of the argument . I found so called professionals were the problem rather than the solution they in ignorance causing conflict

Not a good day and most of my parts wish we weren't around. I've been working on trauma stuff. I attempted to contact my T but never heard back and I can't tell you how damaging that is. Rarely do I ever bother sharing it so to reach out was a risk and not hearing back confirms that I am alone. I have been having flashbacks on top of the other stuff dissociation brings and I'm overwhelmed, sad, frustrated and I don't have much positives to tell them/parts. What do other people do when they feel like this? It's awful and isolating and scary.

While I recognize your initial post was a while back, here's my input. I got calendars on my wall and plan things to do that they will like weekly....it is a distraction, a real mood changer, and attention given to those parts and it prevents dissociation or staying in bed wallowing. So for example, my white board on Monday may have the house cleaner coming.....and we all work together for a clean environment and afterwards a reward.....go to the pool and do water aerobics (the pool is good as is the bath tub), another day I work on teaching materials and for those parts that cooperate....we watch a cool movie in the evening, listen to music we like, or take a walk.....exercising usually helps I've noticed....another day I do clay sculpting or painting.....another day....I take us all for a walk in the park....and so forth. So, I plan distractions that work for the majority and that seems to help keep me on even keel and when my T cancels or some other person cancels.....we suck it up and do something else that is fun/distracting. That really helps "prevent" my funky crappy moods and is emotionally stabilizing. It keeps my end-it-all part busy having fun rather than starting shit thoughts in my head.

A second thing that I do is have group meetings in my head, and use emotionally sensitive language...or more carefully crafted language geared down to kid self-talk.... when there is a problem or a situation that needs attention. Everything has a price (pos. or neg.) and most things can be turned around....for a price (reward, bribe, etc.)-call it what you want but I can bribe my parts to clean the house.....on task behavior=reward. I've worked with my parts to get them to believe I have their best interest at heart....they can trust me to keep them safe. So, diversion.....getting out to fun things....light shows, Xmas tree light ups, New Years fireworks (I know they don't work for everyone), free musical things in the community, exercising regularly-getting out from under those comfy covers, doing my hobbies.....it's not just one thing....it is things all of me enjoys.....taking turns hasn't been a problem much. Hope you are feeling better. Good Luck.

 

[talon]

While I recognize your initial post was a while back, here's my input. I got calendars on my wall and plan things to do that they will like weekly....it is a distraction, a real mood changer, and attention given to those parts and it prevents dissociation or staying in bed wallowing. So for example, my white board on Monday may have the house cleaner coming.....and we all work together for a clean environment and afterwards a reward.....go to the pool and do water aerobics (the pool is good as is the bath tub), another day I work on teaching materials and for those parts that cooperate....we watch a cool movie in the evening, listen to music we like, or take a walk.....exercising usually helps I've noticed....another day I do clay sculpting or painting.....another day....I take us all for a walk in the park....and so forth. So, I plan distractions that work for the majority and that seems to help keep me on even keel and when my T cancels or some other person cancels.....we suck it up and do something else that is fun/distracting. That really helps "prevent" my funky crappy moods and is emotionally stabilizing. It keeps my end-it-all part busy having fun rather than starting shit thoughts in my head.

A second thing that I do is have group meetings in my head, and use emotionally sensitive language...or more carefully crafted language geared down to kid self-talk.... when there is a problem or a situation that needs attention. Everything has a price (pos. or neg.) and most things can be turned around....for a price (reward, bribe, etc.)-call it what you want but I can bribe my parts to clean the house.....on task behavior=reward. I've worked with my parts to get them to believe I have their best interest at heart....they can trust me to keep them safe. So, diversion.....getting out to fun things....light shows, Xmas tree light ups, New Years fireworks (I know they don't work for everyone), free musical things in the community, exercising regularly-getting out from under those comfy covers, doing my hobbies.....it's not just one thing....it is things all of me enjoys.....taking turns hasn't been a problem much. Hope you are feeling better. Good Luck.

Music is a great way also to be grounded in having a normal day . Music for everyone can be difficult depending how many you are .When i have more time i will come back to you . If i can have more information on family then maybe i can help more , Be strong

 

[TruthSeeker]

Music is a great way also to be grounded in having a normal day . Music for everyone can be difficult depending how many you are .When i have more time i will come back to you . If i can have more information on family then maybe i can help more , Be strong

I am not did.....I do not have multiple ANP-just one with a number of child/teen EPs.... fragments of personalities....many of my parts have many well developed talents....my self...is the largest part....makes the final decisions, takes the action, works, makes the schedule, and works with the rest of my parts so that life goes on...My organization/scheduling and balancing life activities.....is critical to everyday success. I have a musical part....we have a once a month music group of 8 people and we play at nursing home gigs....Xmas music, Celtic music, and some older tunes and patriotic music for the elderly. Yes, music can be very helpful, can sooth, and help get chores done.