Do You Ever Feel Like Your Trauma Wasn't "traumatic Enough"?

[katz]

Your mention of your brother here, @Leighlee87 really resonates with me. As the o...

Do we have the same brother? LOL
I was also very close to my older brother. He helped me to understand a lot about how our family worked. He was also able to help me remember a lot of people from our family and from our past so I could match up who I was remembering at a time when I had a memory.

Like you, I don't have much contact with him anymore. At least, regarding family issues. I miss him.

 

[katz]

I completely understand. Even though I suffered verbal, emotional and physical abuse by my parents in...

Thanks. I appreciate your kind words.

 

[katz]

I too have had these feelings and I think everyone is different. Everyone has different levels they...

What you said caught my attention--do you often get angry when people tell you "how you feel"? I get very angry when some one -anyone-tells me how "I" feel! It makes me very angry to be told anything like that, since they don't know anything about me- much yet how I feel !

I wonder if this is some of the effects of what happened to us?? Thoughts?

 

[Deleted member 34328]

@katz YES!

 

[bring em all in]

Sometimes I feel like I'm over-dramatizing my traumatic experiences, and that I'm just a big cr...

I so experience that. My PTSD came from emotionally damaged/unavailable parents, severe bullying in school, and medical trauma. In reading Pete Walker's book, I saw where chronic non-physical trauma can be devastating. I also read Childhood Disrupted, The author writes about how "adverse childhood experiences" such as "not good enough parenting" and bullying actually changes your brain as it develops. The good news is neuroplasticity, which means the brain can be re-wired in adulthood.

 

[KristenEve]

I even start comparing myself to soldiers, (because of the word PTSD) which makes me think that "mine wasn...

Me too

 

[KristenEve]

What you said caught my attention--do you often get angry when people tell you "how you feel"? I get very...

People in my life that don't understand...YES. I hear I'm being too emotional or sensitive. Maybe I shouldn't focus on it. It's like they think taking an eraser to that part of your brain is an option!! I do get angry because I feel like I'm allowed to feel this way but they are thinking I need to forget about it. As hard as it is, that's the last thing I need to do. I need to remember it happened and then somehow cope and adjust to it. That's my current state.

 

[Rani G2]

Hey F-uckYourselves,

the question about “not traumatic enough“ arises (I think this has been stated here already) because we ask ourselves, are we suppose to suffer this much? As if it needs to be justified, so that I am allowed to be" this way".Who says that? How and who defines this?

When people tell things like “Come on, at some point you need to overcome! You cannot expect those people to have the knowledge about trauma, about changes that take place in our minds, the whole impact of it. Its hard though, when people who are suppose to give us that emotional support reject us, play down or trivialise. That happens (My own experience) when people think of “attention seeking“, which I believe is not just about that, behind that lays the fear of looking closely at human suffering, seeing limits there, where we are forced to accept that certain things are beyond control. Acknowleding these aspects means, that people are at some level challenged to look at their own self, understand their own finiteness, their own pain. Some are maybe just not willing to do that right now, and some probably never will.

 

[abbynormal1929]

I can relate. My abuse was mostly in the emotional relm. My wife was physically abused regularly throughout childhood up through her 5 year first marraige. When I express frustration with life she has no problem reminding me that she's had it worse. However when she talks about it in a more neutral mood, she says that emotional abuse she expereinced was just as bad or worse then the physical, mostly cause the physical abuse was more predictable. Main point: I believe it's all terrible.

 

[LMaKenna]

"" A 'you are not alone' kind of thing. And also to remind myself that 'useful' is a better test than Deserving. Because there does need to be some kind of test before you diagnose and treat. The most useful test seems to be the usefulness test."""

BlueOrange, i really don't understand. This is not directed at you so don't be offended, it's directed at the comment. What the FFFF&%*%^^&% does usefulness have to do with trauma and how it affects you? I help everyone and anyone i can. I also just cut open my arm because i'm trying to deal with stuff and counselor just cancelled for the 5th time in the last 2 months(neglect is one fof my issues). I'm sorry, i'm sorry. I just don't understand and i'm really trying to find a way to holld on righrt now. Sorry my handds won't stop shaking i'm doing more backspacing than actually typing. i spend more time thinking everything is djuist a stupid littl thing even rthough i know it's not.

 

[Deleted member 34328]

@LMaKenna are you with anyone right now?

Is there a number you can call or text?

 

[Cain]

Sometimes I feel like I'm over-dramatizing my traumatic experiences, and that I'm just a big crybaby with no s...

I feel this a lot. my trauma comes from the worst times of my depression. i was taken advantage of in my weakness by much older men and it hurts. but it feels like it’s not bad enough because i technically wanted to... even though i was just a kid and i didn’t know what i was getting into. please, someone tell me that being this hurt over that is okay. please tell me i’m not just overreacting. i don’t know what to do.