Poll Do You Feel Like A Victim?

[aut555]

Thank you for your validation. It means so much to me.

 

[Deleted member 35429]

I found an old screen shot that elaborates a little on this topic. Top paragraph..."ironically, victims of rape who blames themselves have a better prognosis" etc

 

[aut555]

I found an old screen shot that elaborates a little on this topic. Top paragraph..."ironically, victims o...

So liked reading this. I did blame myself for the father issue, the rape that followed was a date rape and l was trapped in a vehicle but didn't recognize as such until middle-aged. I was very good at denial techniques because that is control, voila. Now l understand l am not a controlling person but l control how l react to things to keep the status quo of my neglected inner child. She stays happy and feels safe. Thank you for this snapshot.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

@Orion, the very top paragraph in that screen shot puts into words what my therapist is saying as to how me being "bad" and my mom & step dad being "good" and how its connected.

 

[physicist13]

person

 

[J'qel]

I am a survivor. I made it through. Still dealing with the aftershocks that I denied existed for a long time until they knocked me flat (don't do that-is bad). I lived through it, and it didn't kill me, but I think it tried. I'm scrabbling my way up bit by bit, and goddammit I will make it to the top, some day.

 

[The Albatross]

Survivor. That means time and time again I've been in situations and seemingly powerless and not been killed, maimed to the point of disability, and I'm still breathing and what ever it took for me to do so, was what I had to do to survive in THAT moment at THAT time.

I almost clicked "fighter" but in all truth, I didn't always fight.

 

[NoWhereKnowWhere]

I was a victim at the precise time that crimes were committed against me and never again after that.

I HATE the term survivor for me it means I AM as in an identity and I don't want my identity smushed up with the horrible shit. But then my T says I'm very good at compartmentalising for some reason I don't think it was ment as a compliment but that's how I took it:tup: I'll take what I can get.

Fighter doesn't seem right either.:meh:

I AM A NINJA!!:playful:

Definitely! it has been decided that I form hence forth shall identify as a ninja cause ninjas are cool.

 

[One step at a time]

I am myself. I bake cookies and sing and have preferences and experiences, but my identity is the sum of all that, rather than any one piece.

It is true that I have been the object of abuse, which is sometimes called being a victim. I think this word is stigmatized because while it denotes helplessness at the moment of abuse, it sometimes carries a connotation of continued helplessness, which is not true. I was a victim as a child.
It is also true that I have survived things. Sometimes this is called being a survivor. It is true that I fight for myself. Sometimes this is called being a fighter.

But none of these facts are my identity, nor do I really "draw strength" from these facts. Mostly, I draw strength from doing things I enjoy, and from people I love. I am myself.

 

[Lionheart]

None of the above.

I was a victim. I was also a survivor...

However, now, I like to think of myself as a "healing warrior"......because the word "warrior" conjures thoughts of healing, wounds, battle, and victory...(at least it does to my mind).

A warrior develops or is "empowered" with certain skills for which he/she must train.

Being a healing warrior implies that my trauma was a 'war' that I fought and won, and it implies severity, the pain and the magnitude of trauma/cPTSD.