Do You Go Outside?

[Adrian2016]

I have been very symptomatic last few weeks. I have been re exposed to several of my worst triggers. At points I have been struggling with obsession on death and dying, as well as fantasizing violent revenge on my tormentors. I do not go outside anymore unless I absolutely must. I have been incarcerated before and in many ways I feel like I am again. How many of you struggle with going outside, particularly around lots of people??

 

[Friday]

There are only 2 places I get a break from over active senses : In a completely controlled environment, and full sensory overload. Think inside/home, or in the mosh pit of a concert. 2 extremes, but they both work. Everything else takes a helluva lot of energy & concentration.

 

[shimmerz]

I fight this every day. It is so hard. Prior to PTSD, you couldn't keep me inside...

I was 'incarcerated' by my mother. I ran away several times because of it and finally left home at 17. Way too young and ill prepared. I often times, these days, feel like my mother finally got what she wanted. And she has been dead for 35 years. *heavy sigh*. I feel for you.

 

[Ronin]

I like being out & it's where I feel alive, I'm claustrophobic as hell when doing badly.

Crowds also don't bother me that much, chances of close-up interactions I don't want bother me more than that. Plain out crowds & random fellas, however chaotic and disorganized, I just cruise through most times.

Mostly really depends how I'm doing, stress & sensory, and where I am personality wise at the moment, how much a shut-in by choice.

 

[dnp]

Yes, I locked myself inside for several years total. Only left the house to get food and only when the supermarket was empty. Meds and therapy made it possible for me to interact with the world again. Isolation feels so right when you are doing it, but can keep you from getting the help you need. I could have gotten better sooner if I had gotten the right help sooner.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

How many of you struggle with going outside, particularly around lots of people??

Me me me!

I dont have an issue with being outside, my fear (terror) is of people so if outside included no other people then id be just fine. Very lonely, but fine.

 

[Sideways]

I developed agoraphobia during a 12 month inpatient stay (predictable: locked away in a low stimulus environment for too long).

My agoraphobia fluctuates. Sometimes, getting downstairs to check the letterbox is too hard. But I know the signs that it's getting worse, and the sooner I catch it, and fight it, the easier it is to get reasonably back to normal.

For me personally, I have a connection with water. So when I'm really bad, I get my T to take me to wherever there's moving water. Creeks, rivers, the coast. Expanses of water for me to focus on take away the anxiety of people being around me. It's a way for me to go out and practice being around people, but using the water as a way to keep me calm. When my anxiety starts to peak, I refocus on the water. There's something neurological happens in our brain with moving water (so I understand). Definitely works for me.

 

[Adrian2016]

Me me me!

I dont have an issue with being outside, my fear (terror) is of people so if outsi...

Same here...I love the outdoors, if I lived in the country my vitamin D would probably go way up..my nervousness and paranoid thoughts are so bad nowadays I can hardly go into a store even on a good day!

 

[Changing4Best]

I have Lyme Disease, which has over 200 symptoms and is caused by tick bite(s). I have been bitten 4 times that I know of. Needless to say, I am terrified to go outside, walk in the grass or anything like that. Even when I am walking on a sidewalk, if someone has mowed their grass and the cuttings of it are on the sidewalk I get the heee-beee-jeee-beeees! I also am not supposed to be exposed to direct sunlight because of one of the meds I take and also heat effects me adversely, to the point that I will get to acting confused and out of sorts when I am exposed to it. This too is caused by one of my meds.

I do try to get out for walks outside occasionally anyway. I know that it is good for me, even though all this is part of the picture. I go out early in the mornings or near sunset times only though, or stay under an awning and out of direct sunlight. I sit on the porch to do this, basically, and I do enjoy being out there sometimes. I feel safe there. I will say "Hi" to folks walking by even.

I'm an outgoing person, in that I like to talk with folks and be around people. So I go to church, attend the local Senior Center and visit neighbors. These places are all inside and so I feel safe there.

I can even get a panic attack while watching someone on TV or online walking in the grass! I immediately think of ticks and get the chills or something of the sort. I don't own a TV and I am very selective about what websites I visit even because of this. I do belong to National Geographic online though. I like their stories and somehow deal with the fear of grasses and land that I have while watching them.

I have had the Lyme Disease since 1985 or so and I almost died from it in 1990, when it went into my heart. It took 8 Dr.s to find out what was wrong with me and a hospital stay and I.V. antibiotics to cure it that time. Needless to say, this is a big part of my PTSD, but I am also the victim of childhood and adult sexual abuse.

 

[Silent one]

I fear going outside. I only go
If it's necessary. While out, all I can think about is getting back home. I speed through my errands like the energizer bunny. I had to quit my job recently, too much stimulation and people!

I guess practicing being out would be the next step for me. I hope you can manage being outside soon. Best wishes to you.

 

[Adrian2016]

I have Lyme Disease, which has over 200 symptoms and is caused by tick bite(s). I have been bitten...

Wow, I am so sorry for your pain...that really says alot about the strength you posses in your character...amazing that through all that you have endured you are able to keep your faith and to keep pushing...I applaud you and you have just made me realize how self centered I can be sometimes..thank you for your inspirational spirit....you will be in my prayers! Stay strong :)

 

[Adrian2016]

I fear going outside. I only go
If it's necessary. While out, all I can think about is getting back...

Right back at you friend! I know what you mean I had to quit my job as well...I get over stimulated very easily...hopes you will feel the sun shining upon you soo, when you are ready...be blessed :)