Do You Perhaps Punish Yourself By Resisting Self-care? Why?

[AngelKeeperJ]

I have down days. I am hoping with the new meds that I will perk up and do self care on a regular basis....

...But when I am under the waves I hide under my blanket and try to be still and calm. I do the bare essentials for things around here. I manage to keep up with the essentials. I do those every day. I feel relief at the end of the day when it is all done. Nothing more to do....

I'm hoping my med strength I will perk up as well. Hiding under the blanket and sleeping is my coping skill when I am overwhelmed. Feelings get to be too much...it IS hard to care about me.

Before my parents came back from Alaska, and I was living alone, it was bad. Showers, teeth, hair, and surroundings didn't matter. Since I live with them, I try to do self-care, so they won't know how bad I am.

 

[DharmaGirl]

When I start getting really depressed I cancel therapy appointments. That makes no sense, I know, but I do it.

 

[Spiderallis]

I'm not sure if I'm doing this now by letting my kitten shred my hands?

If you are I am too, only with a fully grown iguana instead of a kitten.

I've got a chronic health condition I sometimes just do the bare minimum to care for. The clinic I see my MD and T at has set me up with a care advocate to work on that. It's not immediately life-threatening, but it's shortening my lifespan. That's the worst example, there's a lot of ways I don't take care of me.

Hadn't thought about the reasons behind the ways I neglect myself. Thanks for an awesome topic, I've got a lot of thinking to do.

 

[Philippa]

Wow, iguanas have pretty sharp claws.

 

[Spiderallis]

When I have scratches, they look like kitty-claw marks. Most of the time I've got long fingerless gloves that work, unless she gets startled and holds on tight.

 

[Philippa]

I'd imagine she would have quite a grip when she does hold on. I have to carefully pry my hand out of kitty's claws when she grips on. They are so damn sharp. I need to get special clippers.

 

[missmary]

Growing up it was so important to make sure everyone else was OK - it is an outdated survival tactic I am trying to unlearn.Working on this with my T.

I totally feel the same. I just suck things up until it BLOWS and then- only then -do I take a little time to myself to do something for me, because I have to. *sighs* I hope to find balance some day...

 

[goingonhope]

I'm faced with a little dilemma: The chatter-box is a' chattering away and is eliminating my choices, attempting to persuade me to believe that I shouldn't quote and post here because I asked a question and I am very interested in your comments, ...and additionally the thread is going along well and just fine as is.

When I thought of a solution and considered possibly quoting another and placing my somewhat lengthy and deep comments in my diary, I then follow this with the thoughts, someone might just not want their words quoted and appearing in another's diary as well as likely their alerts.

? So I don't know what to do. :confused: :notworthy:

 

[Sammy]

Posted a response on Tuesday and guess what my T asked me yesterday... when was the last time I had a complete physical? When I gave my answer, he just scowled at me. He gets it though and proceeded to give me a push, asking about health concerns and what I should be doing. Crud, he is going to pester me until I start actually exercising and making appointments. Ugh. I don't like them and just don't care. He keeps telling me to go through the motions until I do care. Argh. :facepalm::stop:

 

[Lionheart]

I have resisted self care on a physical level because it seems so unnatural to me, but I am working on changing that. When I began therapy, I started seeing my family physician on a regular basis, but I didn't educate myself on my chronic illnesses, nor did I take any positive action and therefore, I've not made much progress. *(I'm still smoking, somewhat sedentary, overweight :cp: etc.). I neglected my physical health because I was hyper-focused on healing from trauma, a mistake I hope others won't repeat.

However, I am beginning to exercise, lose weight, cut back on smoking etc. I stopped consuming sugar and have lost 10 lbs in 2 months, so I am on my way, (but still have far to go). I think as a survivor of childhood trauma that I did not learn to value myself or care for my body properly, but that is changing, ...finally. Great topic thanks for posting it!!!

 

[Traumagirl]

Maybe it's my depression that keeps me from caring from myself. It makes no sense. I do the least amount possible when I need it the most. My chronic illness needs a lot of care, and on bad days, I just can't get myself to do it.

 

[KP the nut]

I almost posted but I haven't got the courage to say what I want to yet. I will but :sick::facepalm::stop: