Does Anyone Else Mask Their Anxiety?

[seekinghelpfromhell]

Gadgie, while I wouldn't want to be totally alone, I do wish my spouse was more understanding. She does keep my private business private, but mostly I think that's embarrassment than out of respect for me. She does give me an awful hard time for not being able to cope like a "normal person". She's getting tired of the whole thing, and wants to know when it will ever end. I'd like to know too.

I've had to explain to her that I have had this all my life, and that even though it "seemed" as if I was functioning "normally", my entire childhood was torture, as a very young adolescent and into my 30's I self medicated, sometimes to an extreme, and after I stopped doing that, I had trouble controlling my anger and lashed out at her. When I realized that this might ruin my marriage, I worked on controlling my anger, but I got very physically sick. I involved myself in things that caused even more trauma for me, and it's been difficult ever since. Finally I sought out help, and got handed my diagnoses. All that explaining really doesn't help, she still just wants it to be over. Well, so do I. Does she think I like living this way?

So, in some ways, I'm envious. I wish I could retire and not have to work - I dread it every day. It takes me time to put my hand on the door to leave and gather my nerve to get to the car. It takes me time in the parking lot to gather my nerve to open the door and walk into the building, all the while hoping I don't see or make eye contact with anyone I know. It's hard for me to conjure up a polite smile and say hello to people, when all I want to do is hide...

 

[Denial-River]

At times I have tried to hide my anxiety, but the physical symptoms are so strong that I usuall...

I'm glad I wasn't alone! ☻ I have never been able to mask it; people I've never met & store clerks will approach & confront me about it...I would LOVE to know how to mask it no matter how little the results!!! Hope someone has a nugget of knowledge to share☻ Thanks for your post!

 

[Beemo3780]

I went through periods in my life trying to hide it, and for the most part I can. Only the people that know me really well can usually tell when I'm having anxiety issues. There have been just a few instances where I've needed to "escape" where ever I am though because it got too bad. I can remember one time I had a panic attack at work during a meeting. I had to keep myself as composed as I could, and I left the conference room and hid in the women's bathroom down the hall until I could breath normally again. That one snuck up on me, but I had a lot going on at the time. Had just gotten news that my permanent stay away order against my ex was granted, and I was just days away from moving to a new state after living in the same place for 35 years.

 

[Gs172003]

I try. Sometimes I succeed, sometimes I don't.

 

[Naoru]

I hide everything, everywhere, all the time ... always have my mask on.

Except in therapy. She always knows. :bag:

 

[Freedomfighter]

At times I have tried to hide my anxiety, but the physical symptoms are so strong that I usuall...

I don't try to hide my anxiety, but have to in certain situations at work in order to keep surviving. I don't feel like having to hide any symptoms of this condition really, but there are many instances when anxiety does hit and I wish that I was not at work so I could attend to my own needs. Instead I have to behave as if nothing is wrong, be nice to people that harass the workers and pretend that the people who I work with are good people.

I usually just stay away from people that give me anxiety in the first place, but that is tough to do. And I have had that happening too: totally relaxed and then suddenly anxiety hits out from nowhere and I am flabbergasted because I do not know where it came from. And then there are just little small incidents that spike my anxiety and it behooves me why they are so intense when just little problems arise. But then I realize that many small problems can often have a similarity to crimes that happened to me and just one symptom from a little problem can subconsciously remind me of a stressor from my traumas.

That is so tough to deal with.

 

[Rumors]

Still fighting the anxiety myself..... Just really good at hiding it. I do a lot of self talk in my head. I say things like "you are fine...this is safe...no one is going to hurt you... Deep breaths and go to your happy place." Sometimes I can dial things down a bit by sitting quietly and repeating that in my mind. It's just exhausting sometimes....

 

[Deleted member 541]

Hide mine very well, no one knows when I'm anxious. Although when it gets REALLY REALLY bad, my eyes get glossy and bloodshot like I'm doing drugs. That's the only visible sign. When my daughter was younger and lived at home with me, she knew when I was having one because of my eyes, and she called my anxiety attacks, Mac attacks!!!,

 

[Mim28]

Went to bed and woke up with a higher level of anxiety than normal. I go through phases where my anxiety...

Hi Rumors. Yes, this is pretty much how I live my life, so it's a great surprise to people when they find out. Or they don't find out. They just think I'm not feeling well. Most people wouldn't guess because I generally have a calm and rational demeanor. On top of it, I now work in a very loud environment and I miss having an office where I can take a couple minutes and do some breathing.
Whether or not others notice is not important. If you are feeling anxious inside, you absolutely should discuss it with your Therapist. Your sessions are time for you. it's easy to justify why it's might not be important.... we didn't freak out.... didn't cry.. but it doesn't mean that it's not still affecting and hurting us. Best of luck!

 

[Gadgie]

I can't really hide my anxiety when I'm in public places, as if I'm in a store with my shopping trolley, and I find myself surrounded. I tend to "mark time" like I'm walking, but not going anywhere?

I also get fidgety and nervous looking, (to the extent where I get looks from the shop security) Lol

It's a horrible feeling to get, and yet afterwards I feel embarrassed about my behaviour?

 

[lostforgottensoul]

I cant mask or hide my anxiety. I shake very badly, sometimes so much I have trouble walking.

I downloaded this app (on android): Dead Link Removed

I use the breathing technique and mediphor that works best for me, constantly when I feel the anxiety raising. Im also on Serquel XR (extended release) and xanax (now less due to the Seriquel) to help keep it going super high as it used to but I still need to use the other stuff to help.

I also use DBT self soothing and distraction.

Its important for me to constantly using tools to keep it from going too high and manage it when it spikes.

 

[Denial-River]

I try. Sometimes I succeed, sometimes I don't.

As long as you keep trying is all that matters. great job! ☻