Dog And Kids Are Scared

[Very confused..]

Hi. I am brand new here but really need help. My boyfriend has PTSD and we have been together not even a year. He got my children and me a puppy for Christmas. Since then he has punished her pretty harshly. Last month he kicked her down 4 stairs and body slammed her for biting him. Two days ago he kicked her for chewing his charger. The puppy ended up limping and not wanting to eat.

I told him he cant do that to her. I kept saying it and he said i was nagging him. He got really upset and we quit talking. The next day he hugged me but i was still mad because the dog was limping still. He got really mad and stayed outside all day.

Today we still were not talking and i told him how concerned i was. He got upset again and told me that im not understanding his PTSD and that im wallowing in my own depression (family issues). Now he is yelling loudly at me to the point that im balling my eyes out.

My son told me he doesn't like him for all the yelling.

He is staying outside again and blamed it on me that he is outside because i make him feel like a monster.

Am i doing things wrong? What am I suppised to do?

 

[Friday]

Am i doing things wrong? What am I suppised to do?

Yes. Break up with him.

PTSD doesn't make you abuse animals or people.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

I dont know what country you are in but here in the US that IS animal abuse, it IS reportable, and it is the next step before spousal and child abuse! PTSD is NOT excuse to kick a poor dog! I would get myself, my children, and my dog away from him for all of your saftey!

 

[ladee]

Well first of all, PTSD or not, abuse in any form to any living thing is not acceptable.... Even your child is telling you he doesn't like the atmosphere... what do YOU think you should do? It doesn't matter what you do or don't do, HE is accountable for is actions. I will simply ask why you are staying? You didn't break him and you can't fix him... and keep that puppy away from him !!!

 

[digger]

What others have said. PTSD is not an excuse for abuse.

 

[InfinityBT]

The situation got better to worse. I moved to a new city to escape my toxic mother and this job i found was a dream come true. He was so supportive when i lost custody of my sons and now he is telling me to get over it. I lost custody for moving 5 hours away and my mother was involved and it's a whole novel to write.

But now when i express my concern he blows up and it's my fault...

 

[Sweetpea76]

Nope, nope, nope, nope!

PTSD doesn't make people kick puppies... You have to have a personality that makes you think it's OK to kick puppies, and have no remorse on top of that, and even take it out on other people. Then you decide that your PTSD rage/stress makes those actions Ok.

 

[Sideways]

It's incredibly easy to kill a puppy from kicking it. Ruptured organs, particularly the kidneys, are the most common reason.

I'm so sorry this is happening. But if him leaving your house isn't realisti, the puppy needs to go to a new home. Even if you can tolerate violence against animals (which is a sore spot for me), it's really important that your kids don't witness that sort of treatment of animals. The puppy isn't safe, so one of them have to go.

 

[Recovery4Me]

We had a thread once, a hot and heavy thread concerning entitlement thinking on hurting animals (was a dog in particular). There are thousands of personalities on this board...but let me share this- they came together in no uncertain terms to shout out -NO to physical abuse.

Take a step back and consider

 

[InfinityBT]

Nope, nope, nope, nope!

PTSD doesn't make people kick puppies... You have to have a personality tha...

That is what i tried to express and he said im doing it the wrong way and beating a dead horse. That he feels bad but he snaps and im supposed to accept that.

 

[Recovery4Me]

That is what i tried to express

At this point, I humbly and respectfully ask...are you seeing a therapist? The main problem is not within him understanding what you are offering... it is more than discussing the poor puppy.:hug:

Consider reviewing this site The National Domestic Violence HOTLINE:
http://www.thehotline.org/

 

[ladee]

So what I am reading from you , is that you are not reading us in how serious this is. You do not have time for 'he said/she said'. If you have more concern on his reaction that what he did to the dog, then you need to consider he is abusing you in telling you to get over it in regard to your children... and if the dog inst there, who do you think his next target will be.... If you came on here for us to teach you how to calm him down, that is not going to happen.. if you came on here for us to help you see how dangerous this situation is... we are doing that...No one here on this site will be ok with him abusing an animal, and what we aren't saying is... you or your son will be next..... you have the answers and we can only hope you get you ,your son and the dog out of the situation...