Emotional Flashbacks And Pain?

[Kas_Can_Fly]

I was in the bath about an hour or so ago when I suddenly felt black; angry, darkly and deeply disturbed, filled with disgust and hatred. Then I started feeling sharp pains around my neck. I've had sudden mood switches before but I put it down to being in bad mood, however it was more than that as the emotions evolved and changed with no trigger. I got angry and wanted to hit the water and scream, like an child with a tantrum. I started experiencing pain with no cause around my neck, my neck clicked very loudly so I thought externally that it would stop but then I could barely breath. It was like having a flashback but everything I saw, smelled and heard was normal, I've heard people talk about emotional flashbacks was this one? What about the pain?

I fell asleep for a while after and now I feel better but really shaken and shaky, my muscles are quivering and whilst I don't feel on edge the same way I did before, I definitely don't feel relaxed. Confused.

 

[holycross1]

I actually know what your talking about.

It is so real and so irrational all at the same time.

I try to envision that I have gotten a bit to close to an open fire. And let it hit me like the feeling of to much heat that I know will pass as soon as I can step back. Doesn't always work. But most times it does. It happens a lot to me the last few years. Still learning to cope. I would say that "YES" it is an emotional flashback.

My theory is that we are like these large emotional capacitors that get jolted by "little" flashes and triggers that happen so quickly day by day that we become used to them. Even blind to them. But each little charge stores up in the capacitor we have become.

A capacitor stores up a charge and at a predetermined capacity level it discharges similar to a battery. Some capacitors discharge fast. And some not so fast, but still quick. When we reach our level to discharge as PTSD survivors we discharge then. Not later. Not when its convenient. Right now! Because we have got to let off the huge volume of stored mini events and triggers. For whatever reason, our minds and hearts have to let it go.

That's my theory. As wrong as I may be. That's what I have to offer you.

 

[Kas_Can_Fly]

Thanks that's a very useful insight!

I actually dissociated fully and I've found a message posted by another part of me on a different forum - somewhat of a hateful message. I don't know if it was what I was experiencing that brought her forward or if she was experiencing it underneath. So whilst it could have been an emotional flashback that triggered me enough for her to come forward it could have also been her having a flashback underneath that I was only partially feeling until it got too bad that she came forward and took control I don't know.

But it's useful to know either way that it could have been. Thanks

AJ
xx

 

[TLight]

That's the only type of flashbacks I get, emotional and physcial. I writhe in pain and terror and can't speak. I can see the room, but I'm so 'in' the experience, I can't connect to anything. Sometimes I can get out of them, but yes, my muscles quiver and ache for days on end and I'm shaken by the whole thing.
I hope to God it's some sort of releasing and not just reliving.