• We are a multilingual website again. Read the notice about this.
  • Understand AI use at MyPTSD: all AI use is explained in our AI help page. AI use is by choice here. It exists if you want it, but does nothing unless you choose to use it.

Feeling Greener Than The Grinch

Status
Not open for further replies.
Grief. What a mess! I am sorry. I actually feel very sorry for this little girl being born into this mess.
Both of those little girls won't have much of a chance by the sounds of things.

Imagine that being put on facebook that they are upset about having a girl. She could possibly one day see that.

What a situation to be born in to - in both cases.

Gosh profound grief and loss that results from your PTSD is a real bummer to feel. It isn't fair. Simple as that.
Feeling the feelings. Oh gosh I hate that.

Getting a midwife is a stroke of genius and a really good way to go to creating a plan and a future for you, your partner and your future child/children. Proactive and clever indeed.
 
:x3:

Interestingly, that is one of the first things I said when I heard what they had done......bloody ungrateful little #$$%..........

I really, really, really want to get my life together, I love my partner like it hurts, and I really want him to have a happy life.....seeing his downcast face every time my pregnancy test is negative is really painful.

Whatever I have to do, I will do it to make sure that he gets the best quality of life possible.....he's had such a horrible life up until recently, he deserves so much better than what I can give him, but he has chosen to stick by me, so I will honor and cherish that decision by making sure that he does not have reason to regret it.

I really appreciate everyone's input here, I often bounce home from work wanting to get on here to see what people have said, and you all have really helped me.

I spoke to the brother in law today, to ask if he wanted me to send up some cooked dishes to help out with the Christmas dinner he was hosting at his place.....after all, he might be an asshole, but I've never met parents of newborn's with a crap load of energy a week after the fact!!!!!

He was surprised, but tried to take the opportunity to try to butter me up and blame my partner by saying that he (my partner) had complicated things by trying to say that I wasn't invited, even though it was 'assumed' that I would come with my partner to dinner......

Only problem is.....when I AM invited to an event, I am specifically named....ie 'Will you and Bubzilla be coming to xxxx?.' Considering that he rang up my partner and just said, 'are you coming to Christmas dinner?', my partner knew immediately that it was deliberate, and he (bro in law) knew that my partner would pick up on it, and that I wouldn't attend as a result.

So when he tried to tell me that I was 'always invited and always welcome', I refused to let him off the hook, and just said that I was sure he had more important things to worry about with a newborn.

I also told him that generally speaking, when one is invited to an event, one is mentioned either directly or indirectly, and since there was neither, it was safe on my part to believe that I wasn't invited! He tried to blame my partner again, so I just stated that it WASN'T my partner's fault, but that I was going to leave it at that.

He asked why I couldn't come, so I stated that he had left is so late that now I was on call (I'm in Aged Care), so he tried to play dumb, and asked if it was only on call, or working, so I played dumb, and told him it was both!

So he tried to push the point again, I just stated that if I was on call, it would make sense to remain in an area where I could actually GET to work if they DID call!!!! (He lives 2hrs away on the other side of the city!)


Sent him a text afterwards stating that I was working solid from last monday through to next monday, with Christmas being the only day off, but I was on call.

Also said that now (because you were such a manipulative $%&*) my brother was staying over, so that was that. And as a final little coup de grace, I said that next time it would be a good idea to contact me directly to avoid 3rd party complications (mother in law had been on his case after finding out I wasn't invited).

The interesting part is, he would have said NOTHING to me if I had not called to offer help for Christmas dinner.

That man puts my heart rate up, and visibly increases my anxiety.
 
:x3:
I spoke to the brother in law today, to ask if he wanted me to send up some cooked dishes to help out with the Christmas dinner he was hosting at his place.....

I also told him that generally speaking, when one is invited to an event, one is mentioned either directly or indirectly, and since there was neither, it was safe on my part to believe that I wasn't invited!
He tried to blame my partner again, so I just stated that it WASN'T my partner's fault, but that I was going to leave it at that.

So he tried to push the point again, I just stated that if I was on call, it would make sense to remain in an area where I could actually GET to work if they DID call!!!! (He lives 2hrs away on the other side of the city!)

The interesting part is, he would have said NOTHING to me if I had not called to offer help for Christmas dinner.

That man puts my heart rate up, and visibly increases my anxiety.

I am confused. Why are you offering to assist someone that excludes you, lies to you and manipulates you and your partner? If you do things for people who treat you badly, you are reinforcing to them that treating you improperly is okay. So it is important to be mindful of that dynamic.


Obviously I know very little about your situation so this might all be explained elsewhere. I don't understand why you would have contact with your brother in law anyway - did he not betray your sister?

Anyway my questions might not at all be relevant. I was just confused.
 
no, it is my partner's brother, who cheated on his now ex wife.

And I offer the assistance because it is harder to be an asshole in front of people to someone who is being nice......at least I know I'll always be the nice one, and that way I'm blameless.

Not always blameless, but I'll keep trying to fight the urge to give him some back.

:ninja::p
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Donation drives

2026 Donation Goal

Goal
$1,800.00
Earned
$910.00
This donation drive ends in
0 hours, 0 minutes, 0 seconds
  50.6%

Trending content

Featured content

Back
Top Bottom