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Feelings of guilt because of disassociation

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newclassroom

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Whenever I disassociate I start feeling really guilty and somehow 'weak' compared to all other people in the world who dont disassociate. I know I should be self compassionate because my brain is helping me by coping in a way that brains do. But I cant help but feel weaker even though that's not true. I just feel so numb and paralyzed it breaks my heart that the big dreams that I have for myself seem like too much and I start feeling like I can never achieve a beautiful life because of disassociating sometimes. In that moment I feel defeated and numb. I know it passes but the intensity of it just breaks my heart that I cant function like a normal person and will have to live with disassociation for all my life because theres no cure for it. Disassociation is a coping mechanism which I give myself and my brain compassion for. My brain is doing everything it can to protect me. I just dont want to feel so paralyzed and broken because of disassociation though. I just want to pull myself back out from whenever I'm disassociating because it makes me feel like my lifes over because I'm weak and have disassociation while other successful people dont. What are your thoughts on this? How do you manage disassociation when it gets too much and too foggy?
 
Whenever I disassociate I start feeling really guilty and somehow 'weak' compared to all other people in the world who dont disassociate.

comparing myself to others is a sure ticket to dissociation in my own case. i often wonder if comparing my insides to other people's outsides is a form of dissociation, all by itself. even when i "win" by judging myself superior to the person i am comparing myself to, i am still basing the judgement on a dissociated reality. i have no way of **knowing** another person's life. what yardstick am i using for the comparison?
 
Whenever I disassociate I start feeling really guilty and somehow 'weak' compared to all other people in the world who dont disassociate.
Everyone dissociates. Every single person. Dissociation is a spectrum from zoning out or day-dreaming, to more complex and pathological forms like derealisation and depersonalisation. So, you aren't weak - you're doing something that everybody does.

Which turns it into more of a "how do I dissociate less?" question. Which is super achievable.

We beat ourselves up enough without adding to the pile with misconceptions about things that everyone does:)
 
Whenever I disassociate I start feeling really guilty and somehow 'weak' compared to all other people in the world who dont disassociate. I know I should be self compassionate because my brain is helping me by coping in a way that brains do. But I cant help but feel weaker even though that's not true. I just feel so numb and paralyzed it breaks my heart that the big dreams that I have for myself seem like too much and I start feeling like I can never achieve a beautiful life because of disassociating sometimes. In that moment I feel defeated and numb. I know it passes but the intensity of it just breaks my heart that I cant function like a normal person and will have to live with disassociation for all my life because theres no cure for it. Disassociation is a coping mechanism which I give myself and my brain compassion for. My brain is doing everything it can to protect me. I just dont want to feel so paralyzed and broken because of disassociation though. I just want to pull myself back out from whenever I'm disassociating because it makes me feel like my lifes over because I'm weak and have disassociation while other successful people dont. What are your thoughts on this? How do you manage disassociation when it gets too much and too foggy?
This really hit home. I don’t really have any suggestions tbh I feel that way every single time I dissociate. To know that because of dissociation I can’t even take care of some of the basic things in my life which probably means nothing to people who don’t dissociate... because they don’t even think about it before having to do them (probably just an assumption).. but it just feels like that. It makes me feel guilt sure but more than that I feel angry and feel suffocated as though my life will never get better.
One thing that really helps me is listening to people I can learn from. Jordan Peterson’s talks really help me. Sometimes I listen to Osho. Or Alan Watts. But yea, it still doesn’t make it easy. Thank you for being honest and for sharing how you feel.
 
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