Been uncovering possible memories I had a child, needless to say they're quite bad. However, I never had flashbacks or any idea I might have been a csa victim growing up. I started uncovering feelings and thoughts about 6 months ago and it's been the most turbulent time of my life. Derealization, psychotic, and dissociation episodes have been very abundant. So I believe these flashbacks hold some validity given how aggressively my brain has reacted. Plus it would explain things like my hypersexuality and that I used to dissociate a lot as a child.
However, a huge part of me is put off by the fact I never had any idea or clue about this growing up and now it's suddenly coming up at age 22. Not to mention the "memories" have kept changing. Some things have remained the same, like words and feelings, but the setting and time frame is fuzzy and always changing and it's so frustrating trying to figure what a figment of my imagination and what's real.
Has this happened to anyone else? Just not remembering a thing for years and then boom, something triggered possible memories? And/or things keep changing in the memories?
However, a huge part of me is put off by the fact I never had any idea or clue about this growing up and now it's suddenly coming up at age 22. Not to mention the "memories" have kept changing. Some things have remained the same, like words and feelings, but the setting and time frame is fuzzy and always changing and it's so frustrating trying to figure what a figment of my imagination and what's real.
Has this happened to anyone else? Just not remembering a thing for years and then boom, something triggered possible memories? And/or things keep changing in the memories?