Got over my trauma now I have a ton of anxiety

[master z]

Hard to know how much opportunities I missed makes me sad n the second chances I don't get

 

[Justmehere]

Maybe the anxiety was there all along.

Trying to change her and be wrapped up in her stuff was your way of coping with it. You held on because it was less scary than letting go.

Now you have let go of that way of coping and her.

Now you’ve got to replace it with the harder task of learning to reinvest all that energy you spent on her towards taking care of you. That would lead to many people feeling anxious.

But it’s never too late for a new beginning.

 

[master z]

What you said sounds right

My way of coping up until last few months was taking care of a domestic violence victim

 

[master z]

I have always had anxiety and always had OCD tendancies because was abused as a child. Because I am 29 anxiety was treated way diffrently.

Also come to terms that no matter what because of who I was dealt with for parents I would have never had the child hood I needed to be happy

 

[Abstract]

Hi Master z do you want to say more about what happened as a child?

 

[master z]

I have a controlling abusive mom and a codependent enabling dad

When I was a kid I was misdiagnosed with a learning disability I never had. So take someone who has the ability to figure out neuro behavior to treat trauma and autism but was made to feel inadequate by parents , teachers and kids at school.

It led me to live with a false identity, self esteem issues, sex and relationship issues, codependency issues, really bad un treated anxiety and led to some OCD behavior. I am embarrassed by past bad behavior and have anxiety of people judging me for things out of control.

I couldn't ask for help because every time I did my controlling mom interfered and used it as a way to abuse me and manipulate me and make her feel better about herself.

The thing is I never had a learning disability and was smart enough to go to Stanford . I have a vision problem but my mom would exgaraggte and led to huge trauma.

So if someone says I have aspergers or ask if something is wrong with me that triggers me off. I have social anxiety, gad, trauma and some OCD not aspergers

 

[AliciaEff]

Hi master z,

I understand the confusion here. Generally when people say things like they “got over” something it means they have moved on or healed without ill effects. You seem to be describing getting away from trauma rather than getting over it.

So you are saying that your ex caused you trauma and you got away from her. You would expect that getting away from this trauma would make you feel better, but it has caused you severe anxiety. So you are still being affected by your trauma, but it is not happening to you anymore. Is this accurate?

Are your audiobooks about trauma and PTSD? It’s great that you have moved away from your ex and it will take time for you to want to process the trauma, but I think it’s good if you eventually move in that direction. As others have pointed out, leaving her is not the same as getting over the trauma and the anxiety might stay until you are able to face it.

Let us know if you need help finding resources to work on this or if we’re still misunderstanding your point.