Hair Trigger

[skeenr]

I can go for a week without an episode, but any hint of confrontation with anyone and suddenly I'm a different person. I am typically just an overall negative person, but once I get triggered everything is black and white and I attack aggressively towards anyone near me. How do you control such sudden hatred. I have only one person as my support network and she is breaking under the strain of me, school, and finances. How can I stop from every episode ending with me questioning our relationship and asking to tell me if she is staying or leaving? I know I become manipulative and I don't like it, I am just looking for help learning to change reactions to triggers because I am triggered too easily to ask the people around me to change for me.

 

[cherryblossom]

I really don't understand how your thread title of 'Hair trigger' relates to your post?

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

Maybe they meant hair trigger as a phrase. In the US 'hair trigger' would mean something easily triggered or without rational thought I guess.

Maybe it's just an American phrase I don't know...

 

[skeenr]

Hair trigger is a saying. When something is so sensitive that it barely takes any pressure to trigger.

 

[ghotiff]

@skeenr I have a 'hair trigger' for fear, not anger so I'm not sure if I can help...but I would like help.

Do you recognise when it happens. It is possible to 'walk away', is it possible to alert your friends that they should 'walk away'. Sorry if that isn't helpful, I don't have an anger problem to reference.

 

[skeenr]

Sometimes it is sometimes it isn't. It is usually coupled with a crippling feeling of being cornered that increases my aggression.

 

[Springer80]

Well I think I'd start by showing your girl this thread you wrote. Also I would take time to calm yourself but weave it into your whole lifestyle don't just do it after an icident.

I start doing things that take the heat off your supporter. Do the finances, figure out the bills.

I'd go swimming, to yoga, walking etc. slow exercise. Its not new age soft bs, slowing your breath down, especially the out breath (long, deep, slow) regulates your nervous system and realeases your muscles.

Just look at ed norton in The Hulk. Yes I'm being a bit flippant but its true. You need to soothe your sensory system, calmly.

 

[Springer80]

Using the word cornered is interesting because it implies a kind of fear, or a pressure at least and your residual reaction is force.

 

[skeenr]

Well my ptsd is caused by emotional abuse from my step father. For years he would sit me down and berate me about everything I did wrong so now I get extremely triggered by any conflict with other people.

 

[cherryblossom]

Hair trigger is a saying. When something is so sensitive that it barely takes any pressure to trigger.

Thanks for your explanation. Being in the UK, that is a totally new phrase for me. I was thinking about head hair, and how it related to your post etc :oops:

I guess it just goes to shows that language can be a barrier on the world wide web, and how perhaps you need to be more exact and not use colloquialisms when posting.

 

[Springer80]

Okay and because you were a kid and helpless against him physically and also because as an adult he held credibility over you and as your mums partner he had the emotional advantage.

That must have been tough to wrestle against.

 

[skeenr]

It has made me view any conflict with people like I am sitting being talked down to again by him. But other people give when I strike back like I couldn't do with him. So I get triggered then get some feeling of power over others and exploit it.