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Happiness Challenge Round 2 May 7th

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1) grateful that the rain is so warm now it's only nice walking in it(raining non stop for two days or so), the cranberry juice, managing to kick my self in the behind and finishing the housecleaning despite the anxiety
2) Positive experience: being able to clean the house without being stressed, but in a slow but steady pace and finding some serenity in the midst of it, strangely enough
3) Meditation: read some texts, prayed and meditated for 15 minutes(no flashbacks, not really relaxed since my daughter came and asked me stuff)
4) Exercise: one hour walk in the woods and 25 minutes of yoga
5) Random act of kindness: smiled at and greeted some people on my walk, one elderly man too(he seemed shy, but smiled back and look surprised when I greeted him) and then I helped a mum in my neighborhood and picked her son up at the kindergarten while picking my daughter up and walked by her house and dropped him off, so she didn't need to go out in the rain(she's a single mum and she told me she's tired of being the only one picking her son up and that she wished so much someone else would do it at least once).

This random act of kindness really forces me to go against my impulses a lot! Greeting a older man is something I have big troubles with, unless they're familiar to me. But the other day I thought about the fact that it's really unfair to all the good men to treat them like they were like my abusers, so I'm really working hard on it. (I just have troubles getting a single sound out of my mouth as my mouth gets so dry from nervousness..)

I wish you all a good nights sleep or a good day, depending on when you read this. Hugs for anyone who wants one.
 
1. I am grateful that I am still alive. I am grateful that the birds are still alive. I am grateful that I am still hanging in here.

2. Journal Positive Experience: That I am reaching out to other people. That I am making contact. I am doing this at least despite how bad I am feeling in myself.

3. Exercise: Not completed, back still playing up. Rain too heavy for walking.

4. Meditation: Tried to keep doing this morning whilst waking up.

5. Random Act of Kindness: I stayed where I volunteer to teach someone how to use a computer. He had a brain injury so I had to change the strategies for him specially.
 
"...the aim of a happiness project isn't to hit 10 on the 1-to-10 happiness scale and to remain there perpetually; that would be neither realistic nor desirable. I sought not to achieve perfect 'happiness,' but rather to become happier".
Gretchen Rubin from her bestseller "HAPPINESS AT HOME"

She uses the example of a project that one has been procrastinating on. While working on completing that endeavor one might feel burdened, or even upset, but once it was complete, or even on its way at all, one would feel great relief and happiness, because the unfinished nature of it would have been making one unhappy.

The above might explain why some of us may have had a rough day or two along the way here, but the point is to keep at it no matter what!
 
1. I am grateful that I actually read The Happiness Challenge in bed last night and it was quite soothing. I meditated and napped and it was quite soothing. It was nice respite from the anxiety and stress of the day. I felt comforted by the tactile blanket I had wrapped around me.

2. That friends rang me and we went to see out painted up piano.

3. Meditation - yes

4. Exercise - short walk

5. Giving positive feedback
 
The topic for today is Will Power and habit. I can only speak from my own experience here, which may or may not be common. I am terrible at establishing and maintaining new habits. I have started habits and established them, only to forget about them and notice a week later that something I’ve done for three years regularly I’ve just plumb forgotten about. Another way to say this is that I am very very distractable.

Anchor talks about will power, and explains that this is a limited commodity in human beings. Probably we have all heard of “decision fatigue” by now. The idea is that the more decisions you have to make (large or small) and the more effortful they are, the more your ability to make the next decision will degrade. So if you are making a lot of tiny but unclear decisions all morning, and then you have to decide what car to buy in the afternoon, your “decider” will have worn out with all the little stuff and you will have a tough time making the large decision later.

For those of us struggling with large issues, it can make a HUGE difference to limit the number of decisions we have to make in a day. For example (I heard this on the radio the other day and was stunned!) the President of the United States uses this - he only has blue suits, and all the shirts go with them, so he doesn’t need to think about what he wears in the morning, he just puts on whatever he grabs from the closet. He doesn’t make any menu choices – that is up to other people. He delegates all the decisions that he doesn’t need to make to others so that he is “fresh” for the big decisions that are his job. Pretty smart.

Anchor tells the story of wanting to play his guitar more. He made a chart, and after 21 days… three check marks. Failure. So he looked at what he was doing. He would come home from work and … instead of playing the guitar, which was in the closet in the living room, he would flop on the couch and turn on the t.v. And then he would run out of time and need to be on to the next. He diagnosed the problem as one with “will power.” It was just too much effort at that time of day to get up and walk across the living room, open the closet door and get out the guitar – particularly when the remote was Right There at hand. So he moved the remote, and bought a guitar stand and put the guitar next to the couch. Another 21 day chart and … success! He had played the guitar every single day.

So if you want to do something that it is hard to get yourself to do – set it up so that it is easier to do it (he calls this the 20 second rule – he got the guitar 20 seconds more accessible!) I sleep in my workout clothes (not sneakers!) and I have my workout video cued up and ready to go in the AM. It doesn’t work every morning, but I’m exercising A LOT more regularly than I used to.

It works the other way too – making things less accessible can help to short circuit bad habits – the example he gives is of a compulsive shopper who froze her credit cards in blocks of ice in the freezer. If she wanted to buy something or go shopping she had to thaw the chunk of ice around the card out first, and that was usually long enough that the impulse passed.
 
I love Mother Teresa, Sheila! She's such a inspiration! I think it was she who said she would never fight against anything, only for something. She refused to visit a protest against war, but she did visit one FOR peace! I think that's such an important mental attitude; and try to live my life according these words. (not always so easy though) :) Thank you Sheila for sharing those words![DOUBLEPOST=1369636132][/DOUBLEPOST]Hey Team21 I really hope we go for another round because I would miss you so much otherwise, you help me so much! And even if you don't cope with coming in every day you inspire my simply by being here and doing the best you can, despite PTSD(and sometimes other kinds of suffering and difficulties too!) dragging you down! It's a big confirmation of the force of life!

It seems so strange this: I started cleaning out the house and in 12 hours I have received three offers to get things I have needed for a long time.. What is that?? Letting go of things I don't need, despite the fear and lack of trust that I will ever be able to get those things again if I turn out to need them later, and within less than 24 hours receiving the things I need?? Oh... Just glad! :)

I wish you all a good day and share a video that always pick me up so much! (I love Oprahs screaming!! :D )

 
What does TBC mean ms.Spock? :)

So if you want to do something that it is hard to get yourself to do – set it up so that it is easier to do it (he calls this the 20 second rule – he got the guitar 20 seconds more accessible!) I sleep in my workout clothes
:) How smart! I will have to try this; and make the things I want to do easier to do somehow. Thank you for sharing that!
 
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