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General Has Anyone Else Experienced Holistic Therapy
- Post starter amethist
- Start date
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KP the nut
VIP Member
(((Wife of)))
His TT may surprise you. My T was very open to holistic methods, in fact he was one of the people who got me interested. He had crystals in his office and used aromatherapy along side EMDR. IMHO, both have merit working together.
His TT may surprise you. My T was very open to holistic methods, in fact he was one of the people who got me interested. He had crystals in his office and used aromatherapy along side EMDR. IMHO, both have merit working together.
Ladyhope Somerset
Platinum Member
Wow Amethist, such amazing achievements and how liberating for you both and all in the first morning!!
Thanks for sharing this.
xx
Thanks for sharing this.
xx
Ladyhope Somerset
Platinum Member
As KP said, Therapists are generally more inclined to embrace the holistic approach compared to Psychiatrists.
Although even they are more open minded these days :) .
Well Amethist, like KP, I too had tears of joy for you and H. So glad for both of you. Tell H we're rooting for him !:tup:
- Post starter
- #30
amethist
VIP Member
Sorry it has been a week since the last installment, but her is the next part.
Hubby and I then went our separate ways again, hubby with Adam and me with Paula.
Paula lit another incense stick and we chatted for a few minutes about how being out some where strange had been for me with hubby. I explained how calm we were and how surprised I was at the way hubby had been, being out in a strange place only slightly wobbly, but enjoying being able to go a short way for an hour.
She then settled me onto the comfy table, and covered me with a soft fleecy blanket, for the cold as well as comfort.
She then led me slowly into a meditation, with my eyes closed and imagining a ball in front of me slowly and to try and move it above my head and behind me. I got the ball and moved it, but could not move it back forward. But I could see all sorts of colours in front of me.
She then asked me to think of how this had effected me and how I felt about the future, all in a calm and quite voice. She then suggested I go back before his accident, when we both were happy together, a time before it all came crashing down around us, a time and a feeling that I wanted to get back to.
This was actually the morning of his accident, as it was my day off, it was the 1st of August, the sun was shining brightly the sky was clear and blue, and we were both happy with our lives. Hubby had suggested we go tot he coast for the day, as it was so nice, But I told him no, you have to work this afternoon, but we laughed about him skipping work and joked he would get the sack if he was found out.
So that was the good feeling I wanted to get back to.
She then asked me to look into my subconscious mind and pull out the fears I was holding in there, the thought that I shoved away not to be thought about if possible.
There were many of them, like hubby not being able to keep going and leaving me alone, or him not being able to keep going with life and one day just disappearing forever, in other words, him ending his life. of us loosing the house and everything we have, because of his PTSD, when we I had fought to keep it when I got divorced, and now through all this.
The tears flowed big style at all this, not crying as such, just flowing because of the hurt and pain I was holding inside.
I also had the fear that he would move forward and I would be left behind, still reeling from all that had gone on, and not heal as fast as him. Holding him back from doing things, stopping him form running when he wanted to, and making him walk instead. Not that I have wrapped him up in cotton wool, but scared that I would stop him growing and learning from his new mistakes, so he did not get hurt so much again. Scared he would not be able to cope, and I would end up being the nagging wife saying "You cant do this because, and you should not do this because". I wanted him to be the man he can be, not the one I think he should be now. But was full of fear that I would get in his way, and then that destroy us.
So she took me back before the accident, back to the time where he was the man I met and married. Too see how he was then, and how much of that is still there, and to trust his judgement as I did then. To feel the love we had then, and to see and feel that we could bring it back, we just had to see and feel it.
She then asked me to look for other fears I may be holding with all this, and where I could change that fear into a positive means of going forward in the future. Again these were fears that hubby would try and go back to do some of the things he used to do, when he actually does know he never will be able to, for quite a few reasons. Then suggesting I look into my subconsciousness mind for the answers of ways that these things could be done, but maybe in a different way, so learn to find a way to guide us both into this would be a better way than stopping him doing them.
I was so deep into all this, that I had not noticed Ernie pop his head round the door to see how we were doing. I had not heard the door open at all.
This was a hard session for me, as I had not let so much out like this, but it felt a safe place to do this, and I did feel a lot lighter afterwards. Like I had just got rid of a load of monkeys that had been pulling me backwards all the time.
By this time it was late afternoon and we were all tired from it all. Hubby was tired but so much brighter and lighter in his looks and the way he was talking. He even told everyone that he wanted to take me out for a meal that night, to celebrate how good he felt. It seems he had taken to how Adam had worked with him in a similar way to how Paula had worked with me.
A few of the others there looked at him as if to say "Yea OK mate, we will see if you can do it, when you come back tomorrow. I could understand this, as we had not been out for a meal for over 4 years, and was something we missed doing.
They should not have doubted him, as we did have a meal in the restaurant next door to the hotel that night. When we got back to the hotel that afternoon, it was hubby who asked the hotel receptionist if she would book a table for us, it was hubby who got the room key, and it was hubby who led the way back to the room.
We both showered and got semi dressed up and went out for a meal that night. Like it was something we did every week. Him just drinking shandy, and sat not being bothered by what was going on around him. Not on alert waiting for something to give, and me not watching him and waiting too. We just ate and talked like we always used to do.
This was something to tell them next morning.
To be continued ......
Hubby and I then went our separate ways again, hubby with Adam and me with Paula.
Paula lit another incense stick and we chatted for a few minutes about how being out some where strange had been for me with hubby. I explained how calm we were and how surprised I was at the way hubby had been, being out in a strange place only slightly wobbly, but enjoying being able to go a short way for an hour.
She then settled me onto the comfy table, and covered me with a soft fleecy blanket, for the cold as well as comfort.
She then led me slowly into a meditation, with my eyes closed and imagining a ball in front of me slowly and to try and move it above my head and behind me. I got the ball and moved it, but could not move it back forward. But I could see all sorts of colours in front of me.
She then asked me to think of how this had effected me and how I felt about the future, all in a calm and quite voice. She then suggested I go back before his accident, when we both were happy together, a time before it all came crashing down around us, a time and a feeling that I wanted to get back to.
This was actually the morning of his accident, as it was my day off, it was the 1st of August, the sun was shining brightly the sky was clear and blue, and we were both happy with our lives. Hubby had suggested we go tot he coast for the day, as it was so nice, But I told him no, you have to work this afternoon, but we laughed about him skipping work and joked he would get the sack if he was found out.
So that was the good feeling I wanted to get back to.
She then asked me to look into my subconscious mind and pull out the fears I was holding in there, the thought that I shoved away not to be thought about if possible.
There were many of them, like hubby not being able to keep going and leaving me alone, or him not being able to keep going with life and one day just disappearing forever, in other words, him ending his life. of us loosing the house and everything we have, because of his PTSD, when we I had fought to keep it when I got divorced, and now through all this.
The tears flowed big style at all this, not crying as such, just flowing because of the hurt and pain I was holding inside.
I also had the fear that he would move forward and I would be left behind, still reeling from all that had gone on, and not heal as fast as him. Holding him back from doing things, stopping him form running when he wanted to, and making him walk instead. Not that I have wrapped him up in cotton wool, but scared that I would stop him growing and learning from his new mistakes, so he did not get hurt so much again. Scared he would not be able to cope, and I would end up being the nagging wife saying "You cant do this because, and you should not do this because". I wanted him to be the man he can be, not the one I think he should be now. But was full of fear that I would get in his way, and then that destroy us.
So she took me back before the accident, back to the time where he was the man I met and married. Too see how he was then, and how much of that is still there, and to trust his judgement as I did then. To feel the love we had then, and to see and feel that we could bring it back, we just had to see and feel it.
She then asked me to look for other fears I may be holding with all this, and where I could change that fear into a positive means of going forward in the future. Again these were fears that hubby would try and go back to do some of the things he used to do, when he actually does know he never will be able to, for quite a few reasons. Then suggesting I look into my subconsciousness mind for the answers of ways that these things could be done, but maybe in a different way, so learn to find a way to guide us both into this would be a better way than stopping him doing them.
I was so deep into all this, that I had not noticed Ernie pop his head round the door to see how we were doing. I had not heard the door open at all.
This was a hard session for me, as I had not let so much out like this, but it felt a safe place to do this, and I did feel a lot lighter afterwards. Like I had just got rid of a load of monkeys that had been pulling me backwards all the time.
By this time it was late afternoon and we were all tired from it all. Hubby was tired but so much brighter and lighter in his looks and the way he was talking. He even told everyone that he wanted to take me out for a meal that night, to celebrate how good he felt. It seems he had taken to how Adam had worked with him in a similar way to how Paula had worked with me.
A few of the others there looked at him as if to say "Yea OK mate, we will see if you can do it, when you come back tomorrow. I could understand this, as we had not been out for a meal for over 4 years, and was something we missed doing.
They should not have doubted him, as we did have a meal in the restaurant next door to the hotel that night. When we got back to the hotel that afternoon, it was hubby who asked the hotel receptionist if she would book a table for us, it was hubby who got the room key, and it was hubby who led the way back to the room.
We both showered and got semi dressed up and went out for a meal that night. Like it was something we did every week. Him just drinking shandy, and sat not being bothered by what was going on around him. Not on alert waiting for something to give, and me not watching him and waiting too. We just ate and talked like we always used to do.
This was something to tell them next morning.
To be continued ......
KP the nut
VIP Member
(((Amethist and H))). I am blown away by what you are writing. Thank you so much for sharing.
Sunshine71
Gold Member
Thank you for the amazing update Amethist - I have spoken again to Sharon this morning.
I suppose it such early days - I have everything crossed that this will help you both long term. :tup:
With healing wishes Sunshine xxxxxx
I suppose it such early days - I have everything crossed that this will help you both long term. :tup:
With healing wishes Sunshine xxxxxx
Meadowsweet
Diamond Member
It sounds wonderful. And it sounds like you and hubby are so together in all this. I'm really pleased there are people like you out there.
- Post starter
- #34
amethist
VIP Member
Huge apologies for making everyone wait so long for the next part, PTSD and your own life have to be flexible.
After a good nights sleep, we were both up and about early on the Saturday morning, ready for a full English breakfast and eager to set of for our second day of holistic therapy. We were still talking about the day before whilst eating and wondering what they would bring up today.
As it was a later start, we had plenty of time after breakfast, for me to sit and have an hour on my PC using the WiFi facilities in the restaurant.
Back into another taxi, :rolleyes:, and off again to start the day, both of us looking forward to it all.
They were all there by the time we got there, all waiting to see if we had been out for a meal the night before, and amazed that yes we had, and it had felt so good to do it again.
Hot drinks all round before we started and then we were off again. hubby off with Adam, and me with Paula. Leaving the others to wait and see if anyone else arrived, but doubting it.
As we had done so much work the day before on how hubby and his PTSD had effected me, and I had done so much good work over the past few years, Paula suggested that we look at my own demons instead, things that effected me apart form hubby.
Oh boy was this going to be hard for me to let go of and leave behind. Well that's what I thought anyway.
We went back into the same room as the day before, Paula lit an incense stick and we got started.
She again took me into a meditative state, and asked me what was hurting me the most, what did my subconscious mind need to let go of. Immediately the thought of my dads death came forward, how I felt that for what ever reason I had been kept out of it and did not know he was so ill until it was too late, and how much it still hurt that the rest of my family could do this.
Paula suggested that I look at it as a film on a big screen, and take myself back from the hurt I felt when I did get to my dads side, even though he had already passed by then. Step back form the hurt and pain of knowing that they had all been with him for most of his last day, except from me.
As I did this the screen went blank, as it does when the film ends, I was also convinced someone was holding on gently to my foot, as if it were my dad saying, "It is OK, I know how you felt, I know it hurt and it was wrong what they did, but now let it go". Wow what a feeling of love for my dad I felt just at that moment, tears streaming down my face, but not of pain anymore.
Paula then suggested that I look at myself and my family, and to say what I saw in my deep subconscious mind.
Oh was this amazing.
I could see a large bramble growing over and trying to block the sun from a flower struggling to grow underneath. Paula asked what this meant in my mind, to me it meant that i was the flower and the rest of my family were the brambles, trying to stop me form growing free as a flower should. She then asked "Why dont you grow through the brambles to the sunlight", I told I couldn't as I would be battered and bruised again. "So how else can the flower grow, what other way can you it reach the sunlight", I was asked. "By growing sideways away from the brambles", I told her, "So do it then".
I could then see my own freedom, my way for braking free from what ever hold they had on me, as the flower "A white and purple crocus" was now in a pot growing strongly on its own out in the sunshine. like this one.
Paula then asked what would happen if I just walked away from them, what could I now see around me.
As I looked back I could see them stood under some trees in the shade, in front of me was a bridge with steeping stones underneath, and a small man stood by the bridge smiling. He looked like a Buddha figure, as if he he was telling me it was OK to cross the bridge now, so that what I did. Leaving them stood together, in the shade under the trees.
All I could think of then was why had it taken me so long to leave them behind, and the stepping stones were what i was using before, but kept falling of and going back to them, only to be hurt again.
Paula told me later that my face changed when I crossed the bridge, like a huge weight had been lifted of my shoulders, and she could see me physically relax.
I was then asked if there was any guilt in my subconscious mind that needed releasing, and the only thing that stood out, was that I did not protect my daughter years ago, when she was about 14. But at that point I realized and felt that I should not feel guilty for something that was impossible to do. It was not something that could have been done, as I could never have seen what was going to happen to her. It was not my fault.
I felt free-er at that point than I had felt for a very long time, also very tired and hungry.
By now it was lunch time, and we were both ready to go find something to eat.
Almost finished now, sorry it has taken so long.
After a good nights sleep, we were both up and about early on the Saturday morning, ready for a full English breakfast and eager to set of for our second day of holistic therapy. We were still talking about the day before whilst eating and wondering what they would bring up today.
As it was a later start, we had plenty of time after breakfast, for me to sit and have an hour on my PC using the WiFi facilities in the restaurant.
Back into another taxi, :rolleyes:, and off again to start the day, both of us looking forward to it all.
They were all there by the time we got there, all waiting to see if we had been out for a meal the night before, and amazed that yes we had, and it had felt so good to do it again.
Hot drinks all round before we started and then we were off again. hubby off with Adam, and me with Paula. Leaving the others to wait and see if anyone else arrived, but doubting it.
As we had done so much work the day before on how hubby and his PTSD had effected me, and I had done so much good work over the past few years, Paula suggested that we look at my own demons instead, things that effected me apart form hubby.
Oh boy was this going to be hard for me to let go of and leave behind. Well that's what I thought anyway.
We went back into the same room as the day before, Paula lit an incense stick and we got started.
She again took me into a meditative state, and asked me what was hurting me the most, what did my subconscious mind need to let go of. Immediately the thought of my dads death came forward, how I felt that for what ever reason I had been kept out of it and did not know he was so ill until it was too late, and how much it still hurt that the rest of my family could do this.
Paula suggested that I look at it as a film on a big screen, and take myself back from the hurt I felt when I did get to my dads side, even though he had already passed by then. Step back form the hurt and pain of knowing that they had all been with him for most of his last day, except from me.
As I did this the screen went blank, as it does when the film ends, I was also convinced someone was holding on gently to my foot, as if it were my dad saying, "It is OK, I know how you felt, I know it hurt and it was wrong what they did, but now let it go". Wow what a feeling of love for my dad I felt just at that moment, tears streaming down my face, but not of pain anymore.
Paula then suggested that I look at myself and my family, and to say what I saw in my deep subconscious mind.
Oh was this amazing.
I could see a large bramble growing over and trying to block the sun from a flower struggling to grow underneath. Paula asked what this meant in my mind, to me it meant that i was the flower and the rest of my family were the brambles, trying to stop me form growing free as a flower should. She then asked "Why dont you grow through the brambles to the sunlight", I told I couldn't as I would be battered and bruised again. "So how else can the flower grow, what other way can you it reach the sunlight", I was asked. "By growing sideways away from the brambles", I told her, "So do it then".
I could then see my own freedom, my way for braking free from what ever hold they had on me, as the flower "A white and purple crocus" was now in a pot growing strongly on its own out in the sunshine. like this one.
Paula then asked what would happen if I just walked away from them, what could I now see around me.
As I looked back I could see them stood under some trees in the shade, in front of me was a bridge with steeping stones underneath, and a small man stood by the bridge smiling. He looked like a Buddha figure, as if he he was telling me it was OK to cross the bridge now, so that what I did. Leaving them stood together, in the shade under the trees.
All I could think of then was why had it taken me so long to leave them behind, and the stepping stones were what i was using before, but kept falling of and going back to them, only to be hurt again.
Paula told me later that my face changed when I crossed the bridge, like a huge weight had been lifted of my shoulders, and she could see me physically relax.
I was then asked if there was any guilt in my subconscious mind that needed releasing, and the only thing that stood out, was that I did not protect my daughter years ago, when she was about 14. But at that point I realized and felt that I should not feel guilty for something that was impossible to do. It was not something that could have been done, as I could never have seen what was going to happen to her. It was not my fault.
I felt free-er at that point than I had felt for a very long time, also very tired and hungry.
By now it was lunch time, and we were both ready to go find something to eat.
Almost finished now, sorry it has taken so long.
KP the nut
VIP Member
(((Amethist))), I am so pleased for you and H and that it worked so well.
I'm unsure whether to add the next bit, but hopefully you won't take it in the wrong way. Deep breath, I have to admit, I'm also a bit jealous - sorry:oops:.
I'm unsure whether to add the next bit, but hopefully you won't take it in the wrong way. Deep breath, I have to admit, I'm also a bit jealous - sorry:oops:.
Meadowsweet
Diamond Member
Thats great stuff Amethist. I spent a long while using visualisations to understand whats inside, I think its really helpful. I'd be interested to know if they use the same methods for your hubby. (((hugs))) to you both.
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