Poll Have You Tried Group Therapy

[cragger65]

Have You Tried Group Therapy?

I did a search and couldn't find a thread on this topic, so I thought I'd ask. Have you ever tried group therapy? I was "stuffed" into a group after my breakdown, even though I knew it was the wrong thing for me, and it went horribly.

The experience still haunts me, but I'm wondering if maybe there is merit in trying again? What was your experience?

 

[Tinyflame]

Hi cragger,

I think much depends on whether or not it is your decision to go; you have to want to, be ready to (even if you're fearful or don't know what to expect), and I think you have to go by whether you think you should be there (is it applicable to your situation).

I've been told you usually have a better idea if it's for you after going about 6 times.

I think a lot depends on the individuals, too - some you can relate to better than others.

I don't think I could handle group therapy itself- I'd be a "clam", but I found an excellent-sounding ptsd/trauma program on the Internet (am Catholic also) in Los Angeles and I think Kansas that I wished was available here that was group-based but focuses more on the "present" than the "past". I would try it in a heartbeat if it existed here, I think.

IMHO I guess you have to go by what your heart and "gut" tells you.

 

[TLight]

I attended a 10 week sexual abuse survivors group put on by a local hospital a few months ago. There were 8 women and we all bonded really well during group. It was facilitated by two therapists and we went through a notebook, discussing things like boundaries, coping, feelings, etc. I was all very good information and I got a lot out of it. Plus we did a check in period and talked a lot after establishing a few rules.

I was pretty cautious at first. My therapist thought I was ready for it, as long as I was careful with the group. She said there would be a lot of needy people and I needed to have good boundaries with them. I did.

One woman called me during group instead of calling a crisis line. We helped each other, but it was a little reactivating. Then after group we decided we'd keep in touch. We got together once, and that went well. Then she called up all excited about this 'empowering' sales group and she wanted me to be her partner in it.....some sort of legal thing. She was really into it, saying all the people were wonderful, already bought tickets to the convention, etc.
I made it clear I was a biologist and would like to pursue that avenue and I wasn't really interested in this. Repeated over and over that I'd like to keep our relationship as a friendship. Said I was happy for her, but I also said as long as we continue our healing work, the career and money thing would fall into place. She snapped back at me, "God, can't you just be happy for me?"
I said that I used my 'I' statements, said I was happy for her, was not judging her, but really just wanted our relationship to be about support and sharing good times.

She was upset with me. It just sort of freaked me out. She called again and left a message about this huge party she was throwing for all her new 'friends.' I just didn't call her back.
It just all felt weird to me. Seemed like a relationship headed for stress.........I bailed.

 

[Deleted member 541]

OOPPS I hit the wrong button. I should have voted yes, and it went wrong. I did a small stint of time with a rape survivor group at our local hospital.

It didn't go well and the group was closed down....

 

[anthony]

I have done group therapy, and I would have to say it is by far the superior method to truly helping a person overcome their trauma, however; saying that also means that the person actually wants to help themselves and not just sit there and listen, say little to nothing, and lie if asked a question by not divulging the full scope and depth of their trauma. It only works if you want to truly get better... like any therapy. It all comes back to openness and honesty, putting all fears and issues on the shelf and just opening up and letting it out.

If you can't do that... then group therapy will do nothing for you, nor any other therapy for that fact.

 

[cragger65]

The group went badly because of where I was at at the time. I was too confused by the diagnosis, and therefore as to why I was there, and too angry at the things that were going on in life, and the people yanking the strings.

I did commit to telling my story, and shared with the group openly about myself, as well as giving them supportive feedback and encouragement regarding their own story. However, I overloaded a few times in group, the last occasion resulting in the group leader coming down quite hard on me, and another piece of me broke it seemed. I decided it was best to remove myself at the time, and pursued individual counciling.

 

[Cindy]

week-end retreats

I've attended four week-end retreats for women who have survived childhood sexual abuse. The first two retreats were very powerful and offered good information. Gave myself a space to validate my experiences and reactions. The first time I went, it was the first time a verbalized it to anyone other than my therapist. I was trashed. But I stuck it out with lots of support from the facilitators and other participants.

The second experience I was able to take more in and share and support others.

The third a wash because of the facilitator. It was very flat and not dynamic enough to allow sharing and engaging others in conversation.

The fourth week-end was a nightmare! I will never go again. The facilitator actually was turning it around on us. Placing part of the blame on the child victoms for 'being available'. It took me a month to get over the feelings this stirred up and my therapist two sessions to clean it up. He was furious. I don't think I will go agian. I love this retreat center but I can't take the destructive risks.

Cindy

 

[Other]

It may be a very long time before I even consider group therapy; though my therapist is more accustomed to working in a group environment, I would be unable to cope with the setting.

I suppose, if I were to step outside of myself for a bit, I could imagine group therapy being helpful to some more than others.

-Other

 

[cragger65]

Everything does depend on the facilitator, for sure. It's too bad, it sounds like the retreats have true potential for you Cindy. I'm glad you got something out of the first couple anyway.

The group I attended was at our local hospital. I should have known better, it has a horrible reputation, but I was in a bad way. Got crushed all over again. I don't know if I could ever find the trust to try it again, unless I knew the therapist running it and already trusted them.

 

[Grama-Herc]

My only experience with group therapy was when I was in hospital and had no choice. After 4 days of not opening my mouth, I finally began to feel somewhat comfortable and began to open up. For me, it was a fantastic experience. But then, it was in a very controlled environment and I felt very safe there. But it was very helpful for me.

 

[Cindy]

Hospital group settings (sessions)

After the adjustment period, the group setting in the hospital, depending on the facility gives you opportunity to ask questions and reflect on your personal status with regards to where you are at. Sometimes I have found it difficult because the group is made up of many different mental health diagnoses. But overall if handled properly they can be enlightening. There is only one time in a hospital group setting I basically lost it - on the topic of forgiveness. I had to walk out.

Again it depends on the facility and the facilitator.

 

[2quilt]

I went to a rape survivors' group therapy, and it was hell from the beginning because it mixed abusers who were commanded by the court system to be there, mixed with survivors. Talk about gasoline and a lit match. And it was led by a True Ashhole.

I tried a group for women at the VA, and it was stuffed full of too many women, so by the time it was over, not all of us got a chance to speak because the first few women had alot to say. Several times I had come with stuff to talk about and ask for help, but I just ended up listening to other women for 2 and a half long hours.

I joined a smaller womens' group from the VA, more structured, and it was good at teaching coping skills, but when it ended on the scheduled time, (3 months) there was no aftercare, other than the emergency room, where the VA lets veterans sit and rot. Plus, the VA is where I was raped, and the management took no responsibility and the VA police would not help me, so...

I had tried groups at other places too, but it seems that there is one person that takes up all the people's time and nobody else gets to express their pain. One person monopolizes the conversation while the rest of us nod our heads.

Group just doesn't work for me. That's just me.