Hearing experiences about other people’s depression

[wicked juggalo]

I simply can’t find resources for my depression, and I don’t hear people talk about the symptoms that make depression really disabling, if that makes sense. Staying in bed for days, having no appetite, being self-destructive and purposely ruining your life, and I feel really alone. I See it listed as a Symptom but Ive just never seen anyone talk in depth about it.

 

[whiteraven]

I simply can’t find resources for my depression, and I don’t hear people talk about the symptoms that make depression really disabling, if that makes sense. Staying in bed for days, having no appetite, being self-destructive and purposely ruining your life, and I feel really alone. I See it listed as a Symptom but Ive just never seen anyone talk in depth about it.

Hi @wicked juggalo, and welcome to the forum!

There are tons of book resources out there about depression and a number of websites. I suspect if you read through this forum, too, you'll find lots of discussion about the various symptoms people deal with.

I've had depression for a very long time (it was diagnosed before the PTSD), and I've gone through periods where I was not functioning well at all. I've been on medical leave twice--during which I mostly sat in a chair in my living room in front of the TV and just zone out--have had issues both with not eating and eating too much, used self-injury for years as a coping mechanism, and never did the thing I wanted to do because I was too depressed and felt horrible about myself.

I went from severe to moderate depression, and I see it now as a chronic, mostly low-grade norm for me with occasional severe episodes.

Feel free to talk about how you're feeling here!

 

[arfie]

i don't believe the generalized symptoms cover my own depression. how more is there to say about a lethargic, apathetic slug languishing under the blankets? every party needs a pooper, so go ahead and invite me. i promise to ignore the invitation without comment. i feel like i am the very definition of boring while i am depressed. what more can i say?

when i am ready to get back to living, the feelings which inspired the depression seem far more pertinent.

 

[wicked juggalo]

Hi @wicked juggalo, and welcome to the forum!

There are tons of book resources out there about depression and a number of websites. I suspect if you read through this forum, too, you'll find lots of discussion about the various symptoms people deal with.

I've had depression for a very long time (it was diagnosed before the PTSD), and I've gone through periods where I was not functioning well at all. I've been on medical leave twice--during which I mostly sat in a chair in my living room in front of the TV and just zone out--have had issues both with not eating and eating too much, used self-injury for years as a coping mechanism, and never did the thing I wanted to do because I was too depressed and felt horrible about myself.

I went from severe to moderate depression, and I see it now as a chronic, mostly low-grade norm for me with occasional severe episodes.

Feel free to talk about how you're feeling here!

For me, I get severely depressed in the autumn and summer but usually my depression is quieter in other seasons, it’s coming back now but I have a lot of things to look forward to, like being closer to friends and teammates. So I’m healing a little, and I understand that relapsing into depression and Self-harm is just a part of healing.
So when I’m depressed I just lay in bed the whole summer … and forget to eat and just play video games all the time. Chronic fatigue is a huge symptom for me. I put in screen time limits and they helped me a lot since video games can get unhealthy for me. I’m also coping by having a meeting point in a park to see my friends.

 

[mamachick]

I have fallen into the depression. My sister died in August. We had not spoke in 9 yrs and she abused another sister when she was dying of cancer. So, its not grieving any loss to be blatantly honest. However, both parents gone forever ago, and loosing 3 sisters in past 9 yrs, the realization that I am the only one left in our nuclear family. Then a good friend of mine died of a major heart attack august 21. That has weighed heaving on me. We were friends for 50 yrs. Actually, I have lost more than a handful of people in the past few years. This is on top of my many illnesses. Im on oxygen full time. I have 2 dogs that shed and cant vacuum anymore. My husband hates me making requests and makes it difficult. I feel pretty helpless. My dogs sleep in my room and even though Ive been coughing and sneezing, I wont even try to dust and vacuum. For the past 3-4 days, Ive barely been able to brush my teeth and I just stay in my bed. I haven't showered and bedding needs change, and I dont care. This is way off for me. Im so tired...I sleep at least 15 hours of 24. Its raining out and when husband tried to take dogs out they would not go, then one peed in my bedroom. First I asked husband to get green machine to clean up....but then said never mind, I dont have the energy to do it. I have never been this bad in my life. No appetite and only ate a banana and couple crackers in several days....Had bad case of colitis and scheduled to get gallbladder out in oct. I just dont know how to crowl out of the hopeless hole I am in. If you have read this, thank you for taking the time. Not very pleasant, and mad at myself.

 

[Tinyflame]

I felt so sad to read this @mamachick - there you were trying to cheer me up while feeling like H*ll yourself!

Remember too with the need for oxygen that changes so much. Most people feel very depressed or immobilized. One tiny step is great. But so is cutting yourself a break. And a dog-accident isn't a bomb- not the end of the world. Please don't be mad at yourself, you can only do the best you can at any given time, especially when your health won't cooperate, and tomorrow is a new day. And undoubtedly you will probably feel a lot better after your gallbladder surgery.

Much much love to you xoxox.

 

[Tinyflame]

Somehow I made a booboo 2nd post @mamachick so I will add gentle hugs instead!!

 

[mamachick]

Tinyflame-my junk didnt hit me util a week after yours. Just an accumulation. I am taking care though, I love staying in bed with comfy pillows. My husband doesn't get it. Wants to take me to ER, something must be really wrong if there's no dinner. Hey still got humor, always got humor.lol

 

[Tinyflame]

Oh @mamachick it's a wonder he didn't say he's getting scurvy..

 

[mamachick]

Oh @mamachick it's a wonder he didn't say he's getting scurvy..

Have to miss much more than a few meals. lol