Just a little venting here, thanks for the support ahead of time. It does help.
Wife of 3+ years had multiple triggers this week and really went off on me today. I got the "You don't care or respect me; we should separate" talk again. I've had it many times, and when they get really bad, I come on here and this helps me release a bit.
I meet up with some college friends 2-3 times a month. My wife absolutely hates it, but I need a little "me" time every once in a while, correct? I shouldn't say she absolutely hates it, most of the times she disapproves, a few times she's somewhat "supportive," I think she understands why I do it. Either way, she was not happy this time (Monday). The following day, she hosted a cooking party for a friend. There was a lot of people she didn't know and the anxiety triggered her again (Tuesday). Things kinda lingered throughout the week, where it felt like at anytime she would boil over, but it didn't really come until today.
She started blasting me with all the wrongs I've ever done to her since we've known each other; how much I've disrespected her thru the years. To me, they seem like very minor offenses, but I've realized as I've educated myself on PTSD, that they can mean the world to a sufferer. I try to assure her that I've learned from those mistakes and I do really care and respect her. She says "no, you don't." I ask her to name one time in the past year I disrespected her. She can't name any, but says I am. It's all in her head.
It's extremely frustrating, when I don't feel like I am doing anything to warrant this treatment. I do my best to not "punch back" but it does eventually boil over and I take it out by slamming the door, or stomping the ground. She says that triggers her too and I am working on catching myself.
I love my wife very much and am hurt to see her like this. I feel like I'm a good husband. At least, I'm trying my best. It's just tough to be constantly told how awful a person I am.
Apologies for being a little long-winded. Not looking for solutions as I've found time is the only real cure for these things. Just support. Thanks.
Wife of 3+ years had multiple triggers this week and really went off on me today. I got the "You don't care or respect me; we should separate" talk again. I've had it many times, and when they get really bad, I come on here and this helps me release a bit.
I meet up with some college friends 2-3 times a month. My wife absolutely hates it, but I need a little "me" time every once in a while, correct? I shouldn't say she absolutely hates it, most of the times she disapproves, a few times she's somewhat "supportive," I think she understands why I do it. Either way, she was not happy this time (Monday). The following day, she hosted a cooking party for a friend. There was a lot of people she didn't know and the anxiety triggered her again (Tuesday). Things kinda lingered throughout the week, where it felt like at anytime she would boil over, but it didn't really come until today.
She started blasting me with all the wrongs I've ever done to her since we've known each other; how much I've disrespected her thru the years. To me, they seem like very minor offenses, but I've realized as I've educated myself on PTSD, that they can mean the world to a sufferer. I try to assure her that I've learned from those mistakes and I do really care and respect her. She says "no, you don't." I ask her to name one time in the past year I disrespected her. She can't name any, but says I am. It's all in her head.
It's extremely frustrating, when I don't feel like I am doing anything to warrant this treatment. I do my best to not "punch back" but it does eventually boil over and I take it out by slamming the door, or stomping the ground. She says that triggers her too and I am working on catching myself.
I love my wife very much and am hurt to see her like this. I feel like I'm a good husband. At least, I'm trying my best. It's just tough to be constantly told how awful a person I am.
Apologies for being a little long-winded. Not looking for solutions as I've found time is the only real cure for these things. Just support. Thanks.
