Best advice I can give is delete your Facebook account. I could go on and on about privacy and politics and job related bullshit. I could rant and rave about poseurs and liars and fakes. I could mention spam and a million other things wrong with "The Social Network" ad nauseum.
None of that bullshit is worth the effort.
So, delete Facebook, eh, Sludge? Really? For vets suffering Combat related PTSD, I say yes.
Here's why:
1. We all ready have issues with isolation, paranoia, and social interaction. Why willingly place yourself in a virtual environment that only furthers these feelings? You have stated that you feel the need for social interactions with your family, yet you are ashamed of what they will think. This is perfectly normal for us Beast-battlers, but trust me, hiding behind a virtual persona online with people you actually know and have met is a bad idea...especially family.
2. Instead of Facebook, send an email, or a text message. Then work up to phone calls. Or if one is so inclined, write actual letters! By hand! On Paper! This is the best case scenario, because you can re-read what you have written, reflect on it, and then decide if you want to actually send it. Sounds crazy, but try it out. Seriously. One never realizes how therapeutic writing can be for oneself until they try it. Sorry, typing don't count.
3. The interwebs is generally an environment where context and syntax are lost. We don't realize it, but tone of voice, gestures and facial expression are just as important as speech when communication with another human being. There is nothing wrong with using the web to communicate, but to get yourself on the path to some semblance of a "normal" life, you need to start over from scratch and rebuild from the ground up.
4. You would be shocked to find out that most if not all of the people on Facebook are just as numb and sad and lonely as you are....and they do not have PTSD. Again, trust me on this one. It's fact. Why face a bit of reality and humanity when you can let the electronic crack box do it for you. I guess what I am saying is most people feel like they don't fit in most of the time. It is one of the things that make us human. We need to interact with our own kind on an instinctual level. We do not get a choice. We have to. It is part of our reptile-brain imperative to reproduce.
5. Once you delete your account (it takes about two weeks), create a new one. No pictures, no posts about how big the dump you just took was, or re-posting stupid pictures of cats with baby talk captions, or music videos no one but you even knows about. Just post once with " I don't use this account anymore. Just call me or write." Don't accept and friend invites or anything. Set all the Facebook spam emails to go direct to your spam box, and ignore them. Now you have a Facebook account that you can use for those web apps (like Spotify and such) that require one, but you have no way to feel electronically alone AND you have the kick in the butt to get out there and communicate like people should. You may even find the folks you actually want to talk to will call you, if only to find out why you deleted your account. (Best answer to that question is, I have a phone. Why spend a week having a conversation when a call allows it to happen in real time?)
6. You found us. You don't need 1500 "friends" that likely are not even real people but false web personas just like the one you used to have. Here you are kindred. You do not have to worry about what others think because we all think the same sort of ways and feel the same isolation and rage and anguish and fear. Most of the folks on Facebook would be hard pressed to spell those words, let alone define them. Here, we all live them every day. Just like you. Hell, many of us here have a persona we use. Funny, though- they are all the same. Some random angrysadscareddisgustedreadytostompgutsfrustratedlonelyisolatedcavedwellingcryingnumbempty bastard reaching out to try and feel a little better about themselves and life in general.
7. There is a bazillion other things to do in this world that are far more entertaining and far healthier than staring at the crackbox and feeling sad because it seems you don't fit in to an electronic money making scheme poorly disguised as a way to interact that does everything it can to keep you from ACTUALLY interacting with others. No reason to make yourself feel that way if you can help it.
As for feeling like one doesn't fit in. Hell, I felt like that long before I joined the military, let alone ended up with PTSD For me, I found it was much more fun to force others to adapt to me, rather than trying to adapt to them. Handlebar mustaches, ugly fishing hats and loud Hawaiian style shirts did it for me;)
Hang in there, it seems like it gets worse before it gets better, but with a little effort, things will get better. Nice thing about being on the bottom is there is nowhere to go but up.
None of that bullshit is worth the effort.
So, delete Facebook, eh, Sludge? Really? For vets suffering Combat related PTSD, I say yes.
Here's why:
1. We all ready have issues with isolation, paranoia, and social interaction. Why willingly place yourself in a virtual environment that only furthers these feelings? You have stated that you feel the need for social interactions with your family, yet you are ashamed of what they will think. This is perfectly normal for us Beast-battlers, but trust me, hiding behind a virtual persona online with people you actually know and have met is a bad idea...especially family.
2. Instead of Facebook, send an email, or a text message. Then work up to phone calls. Or if one is so inclined, write actual letters! By hand! On Paper! This is the best case scenario, because you can re-read what you have written, reflect on it, and then decide if you want to actually send it. Sounds crazy, but try it out. Seriously. One never realizes how therapeutic writing can be for oneself until they try it. Sorry, typing don't count.
3. The interwebs is generally an environment where context and syntax are lost. We don't realize it, but tone of voice, gestures and facial expression are just as important as speech when communication with another human being. There is nothing wrong with using the web to communicate, but to get yourself on the path to some semblance of a "normal" life, you need to start over from scratch and rebuild from the ground up.
4. You would be shocked to find out that most if not all of the people on Facebook are just as numb and sad and lonely as you are....and they do not have PTSD. Again, trust me on this one. It's fact. Why face a bit of reality and humanity when you can let the electronic crack box do it for you. I guess what I am saying is most people feel like they don't fit in most of the time. It is one of the things that make us human. We need to interact with our own kind on an instinctual level. We do not get a choice. We have to. It is part of our reptile-brain imperative to reproduce.
5. Once you delete your account (it takes about two weeks), create a new one. No pictures, no posts about how big the dump you just took was, or re-posting stupid pictures of cats with baby talk captions, or music videos no one but you even knows about. Just post once with " I don't use this account anymore. Just call me or write." Don't accept and friend invites or anything. Set all the Facebook spam emails to go direct to your spam box, and ignore them. Now you have a Facebook account that you can use for those web apps (like Spotify and such) that require one, but you have no way to feel electronically alone AND you have the kick in the butt to get out there and communicate like people should. You may even find the folks you actually want to talk to will call you, if only to find out why you deleted your account. (Best answer to that question is, I have a phone. Why spend a week having a conversation when a call allows it to happen in real time?)
6. You found us. You don't need 1500 "friends" that likely are not even real people but false web personas just like the one you used to have. Here you are kindred. You do not have to worry about what others think because we all think the same sort of ways and feel the same isolation and rage and anguish and fear. Most of the folks on Facebook would be hard pressed to spell those words, let alone define them. Here, we all live them every day. Just like you. Hell, many of us here have a persona we use. Funny, though- they are all the same. Some random angrysadscareddisgustedreadytostompgutsfrustratedlonelyisolatedcavedwellingcryingnumbempty bastard reaching out to try and feel a little better about themselves and life in general.
7. There is a bazillion other things to do in this world that are far more entertaining and far healthier than staring at the crackbox and feeling sad because it seems you don't fit in to an electronic money making scheme poorly disguised as a way to interact that does everything it can to keep you from ACTUALLY interacting with others. No reason to make yourself feel that way if you can help it.
As for feeling like one doesn't fit in. Hell, I felt like that long before I joined the military, let alone ended up with PTSD For me, I found it was much more fun to force others to adapt to me, rather than trying to adapt to them. Handlebar mustaches, ugly fishing hats and loud Hawaiian style shirts did it for me;)
Hang in there, it seems like it gets worse before it gets better, but with a little effort, things will get better. Nice thing about being on the bottom is there is nowhere to go but up.
