How A Person Emotional Blackmails People

[Sandra]

Me too Loloma.

 

[Sandra]

From the same book.

We buy the blame, and our guilt flows freely. We're ripe for the belief that comes from giving in to the blackmailer.

 

[Sandra]

From the same book.

Obligation and guilt were tightly bound together. Few of us can contemplate not fulfilling what we consider to be our obligations without feeling guilty.

 

[Sandra]

Sometimes yes and sometimes no. Confronting my family would only lead to violence against me. So in this particular situation this is not a good idea.

On the other hand there are a whole host things I need to stop running away from and turn around and face and confront. I don't know if I can do it though.

My siblings weren't violent towards me just treating me in a nasty way. But I hear you loud and clear on that Ms. Spock. And I hear you about confronting people. It took me almost 20 years to finally confront my brother. And the outcome was not good.

 

[Anna]

I was beaten once by a family member who was also a child. I remember once being pinned against the stairs and the thumping round my head. I remember hearing the bones creak.

I never talk about it, because if I do the emotional blackmailer will tell me it is all a lie. Everything I remember is a lie. My whole childhood is a lie.

 

[Sandra]

I hear you Anna, some people will NEVER own up to their wrong doings.

 

[Sandra]

Now that I think about it I am dealing with an emotional blackmailer right now. I recently got angry at someone for being rude to me and ignoring me on yahoo messenger. And I told him I didn't like how he was treating me. So far he has given me the silent treatment. And in his eyes he is right and I am wrong. And refuses to apologize. Now I can see what failed his marriage on his end. Cutting off the lines of communication and trying to blackmail me into thinking he is right and I am wrong. Needless to say it isn't working on me. And I bet that's why he is giving me the silent treatment. All I can say is if he treats people like this he is going to end up a very lonely man.

 

[Marie E.]

Very lonely indeed Sandra!!

 

[Sandra]

If I wasn't reading this book right now I probably wouldn't have realized he was trying to blackmail me into thinking he is right and I'm wrong. So this book is working for me already.

As I said in another post about this info helping for our futures. Little did I know I would be facing that sooner then I thought I would.

 

[Sandra]

From the same book.

Once blackmailers see that their target's guilt can serve them, time becomes irrelevant. If there's no recent incident to peg their guilt and blame-peddling on, one from the past will do just fine. There's no point at which a guilt producing event is allowed to diminish and reparations are considered fully made. Blackmail targets discover that whatever their real or imagined transgression may be, there is no statute of limitations-no point after which an ancient crime ceases to be an issue, or a punishable offense.

 

[Sandra]

From the same book.

Even if the guilt we feel is appropriate, an emotional blackmailer will not let us forget what we've done or allow our guilt to serve it's function of helping to correct our behaviour and serving as a teacher for the future.

 

[soulofLC]

OUCH! Sandra. Too true, that one really hurt! (sigh...)

<No need to quote the post directly above your reply. Thanks Amethist>