How A Person Emotional Blackmails People

[ms spock]

That also comes to another issue for children that had been abused. They were always in a survival mode. But they never had a choice. And children should not have to live like that.

Absolutely Sandra.

How to turn off the hyperviligance is a big question for me.

 

[Sandra]

At least for me I still live in a survival mode. As to me it's always been this way.

 

[Sandra]

They build themselves (for a variety of complex reasons) and feel better making us less than them.

They are basically throwing their pain onto us. In their eyes that is releasing their pain. But is only making matters worse.

 

[Sandra]

Wow! That is a great strategy!

That's what an abuser thrives on to watch their victim squirm and be in pain. As I had mentioned in their eyes it lessens their pain to dump it on someone else.

 

[Sandra]

At least for me I still live in a survival mode. As to me it's always been this way.

As I still try and protect myself more then if a person that hadn't been abused. My walls are still so high.

 

[soulofLC]

I can relate to that Sandra...I feel like I protect myself to the point of isolation. Yes, that is what has always happened and I don't know how to get out of it. It is so painful, but so is the alternative.

 

[Sandra]

A lot of it has to do with our lack of trust too SoulofLC. But that is a normal reaction when one had been so abused.

I am bad myself for staying so isolated too.

 

[soulofLC]

I think that is why this forum is so appealing. It is the only time I really feel connected to anyone. Yes, Sandra, lack of trust and expecting to be abused again...I guess that has to do with abuse and the PTSD response?

 

[Sandra]

Absolutely SoulofLC.

 

[soulofLC]

Thanks for confirmation Sandra.

 

[Sandra]

Another good comeback for an abuser is how you would like if I treated you in the same manner? But I am not going to because I'm not going to stoop to your level.

 

[ms spock]

They are basically throwing their pain onto us. In their eyes that is releasing their pain. But is only making matters worse.

Well it feels better for them. Otherwise they wouldn't do it.

They have a different framework from us.