How Do You See Your Significant Other?

[Deleted member 28812]

How do you see you significant other? Could you nail it down to one word? How do you see your role in the relationship?

I ask myself if my husband sees me as naive because I do not see all the dangers he does.

 

[Kintsugi]

In one word... companion.

How do I see my role in the relationship? It is manifold, as is his. I play many parts as does he. He is protector. I am financier. He is builder. I am communicator. He is fixer. I am patience. He is action. I am thought. He is strong. I am calculating.

It goes on and on.

Are you a supporter, and thus he sees dangers that you would not think of?

 

[Deleted member 28812]

Yes and my guy hates going to restaurants and so on.
He sees dangers where I see none. At least this is what I think.

 

[Kintsugi]

I hope to reassure you by saying that paranoia is not a virtue.

I happen to be with someone who is also extremely paranoid, so we're mostly on the same page, but it's not something I would call a desirable trait or a personality plus. Perhaps he is better able to recognize whether or not his paranoia is founded by being with someone who does not feel that same paranoia.

Just my two cents. :)

 

[Deleted member 1860]

Yes but are those dangers real? Are they likely to happen?

 

[Deleted member 28403]

@Solara In most cases not, by my guess...

I see her as my ray of hope, basicallly, a life source, reason to live... She is much better than me!

And for myself... I often can't understand how and why does she love me so much!

 

[Lionheart]

I see my significant other as my better half, my companion, lover, best friend and partner. I see my role as different than hers in some ways, but equally important. (I am fiercely loyal and protective of my loved ones, so perhaps the Lion Avatar fits me in that respect).

If I may comment about danger;....I think that as a PTSD survivor that I have a heightened sensitivity to possible signs of danger, in that I am hypervigilent. Perhaps, you are witnessing hyper-vigilance and are not naive at all, just maybe not as sensitive to it.

 

[illusionist]

He Tarzan
Me Jane

 

[WillyKat]

Remote.

 

[Seagreen]

I see my partner as childlike. He is playful, trusting, carefree, naïve, selfish and unreliable. We have a lot of fun being silly together but whenever there is a crisis he is no where to be found. My role is to do all of the manly stuff and take on all responsibility. His role is to help out when asked and muck around with the kids. I wish he could be more of a grown up sometimes.

 

[Momofthree]

First off I'm a 'sufferer' and I have three children under the age of 10 who are not my SO's but whom I have full time with no support from my abusive ex husband. I see my SO as my safe place, in his arms the world goes away and I know I am safe. I think my role in the relationship is to be his partner in crime :) I am extremely loyal and a care taker/ spoiler I love to give until I have nothing left to give and then I give some more. This leaves me drained and vulnerable. I am vary often taken advantage of and abused by those I'm trying to help and love. My partner is my refuge, he is the person who at the end of the day will sit quietly and watch TV with me after the kids are in bed or he will keep the kids at bay for a couple of hours so that I can play a video game, read a book, or take a nap.
As for the danger thing I agree with @Lionheart777 hyper-vigilance is a common symptom of PTSD, our 'fight or flight' trigger is very sensitive and because of this we tend to have a higher level of response to a situation then is necessary. Where a none sufferer would hear a loud noise and turn to see what it was (maybe jump a little) and then once they see it was just a car backfiring they move on, a sufferer may fall to the ground, duck and cover, and then have a racing heart rate for several minutes afterward. The restaurants may be a crowds thing, I don't care for crowds because there is nothing worse then that embarrassing moment of having a trigger happen around a bunch of strangers.

 

[Nam]

Rock

He is stable. Always consistent. He is my lighthouse in a raging sea.